Over the Horizon
by Only The Lucky
Summary: Three years after the tragic suicide of Rosemaire Hathaway. Her old friends and lover reunite, trying to get over the grief of what happen. But what will happen when Rose mysterously rises from the dead?
1. Chapter 1

**Over the Horizon**

**Prologue **

Rose's P.O.V

"He'll be back." I told myself while pacing in my room. The covers were disheveled stuff was randomly on the floor and I'm pretty sure my bathroom didn't smell of fresh either. "He'll help me." I continued on, not really knowing if it was true or not. NO! It's true, all of it is true.

After the attack me and Dimitri got together again, more of a celebration than a spur of the moment. We were both alive, and we both had that to be thankful of. I know I'm thankful, and he showed me how thankful he is. I smiled back at the memory, it keeping me sane till reality kicked back in.

"But he left." I said while sitting on the floor, stopping me never-ending pacing. "He's gone." I curled up in a ball. I looked ridiculous, just sitting there. Tears running down my cheeks, my hair not perfect like it used to be also I haven't taken a good shower in a while. A knock on the door temporarily sent me out of my cruel depression. Lissa let herself in, not even letting me get up to get the door.

Lissa stood in front of me, high and mighty. She wore her regular designer boots along with a black silk mini skirt and a tank top covered by a dark red jacket buttoned up enough to show her cleavage. Her hair, perfect, make-up, perfect, life, perfect. Me, well that needs no explaining.

"Rose, tonight is the night of the prom! We've graduated and they're letting us go out to the mall again to get some dresses." She said oozing happiness. Lissa recently was always oozing happiness. She and Adrian's spirit sessions kicked up a notch, doing more spirit and doing it all the time. A result, me getting the darkness. I didn't even know I was sucking it away from her – I just was. Like I'm not in control of it anymore.

"So get up Rose, let's get you out of this funk."

"I don't want to!" I yelled shocking her. "I want to sit here, and do nothing. Okay Lissa, so go out with your royal ass hats and do whatever you want because that's what you always fucking do!" I screamed getting up and pushing her out of the door before she could even respond. Sorrow filled the bond, and unknowingly got up into me. Making me feel – sad.

I burst into tears as I though again about my Dimitri situation.

First it was annoying not being able to see him. But because of the large strigoi attacks they needed more guardians. The time limit was a week, then a month, now people are saying forever. I'll never see him again, it breaks my heart and the darkness is so not helping!

Then something just clicked inside – _"Make it go away." _A voice like mine urged me. _"Make them all go away"_

"Yes, make it go away." I said calmly and looked at my closet. I opened it up; the hook was nailed into the wall, holding up a winter jacket. I took the jacket off and pulled at the hook till it came free. I then took on my of animal behavior book and a chair in the corner. I put the chair in the middle of my room and climbed on it. I lined the hook with the ceiling and started banging my book on the hook to push it in the wall. I was surprised no one was disturbed my the noise but soon my attention was elsewhere.

When I was done, the hook was comfortably in the wall the hook shiny point gleaming proudly. I didn't smile at my work, all I did was go back to the closet and get the rope that I got from survival skills test. I tied the rope to the hook, making a another tie at the bottom.

"_Not quick enough!"_ The voice said. I went the bathroom pulling out the razor I took from Lissa to keep her away from it. I bent over the sink and made deep crimson lines on my wrist. The red bleed out of me onto the sink. Lots of blood that I was almost memorized by it.

I went back to the chair, the blood making a trail behind me. I climbed on the chair and took the rope, snuggling around my neck. I took a deep breath, my mind surprisingly blank. Not thinking of anyone or anything.

I took another deep breath, and kicked the chair from under me.

**A.N/ Okay so I decided to make a full blown story of this. Yay? Not sure how this will pan out, I mean I have the story laid you in my mind I just hope you guy's love it like my brain does! So can't wait to get your response. Of course this is a prologue so it's short – duh but other chaps will be longer! The one-shot I made will not be in this story but it will be mention so you people can read that if you want to. **

**Also I can already hear the questions of why our awesome Heroine is committing suicide over a guy. Everyone knows when you're already down adding things to your misery makes those things that much worse then they would be when you have a clear head. So the darkness only intensified the pain of losing Dimitri. For Rose and of course there are other things to it – but that will be explained…later. **


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N – Time to see what Dimika thought when he found out Roza was dead…**

**Chapter One**

**Dimitri's P.O.V**

I was ecstatic, the strigoi had been neutralized, those surprise attacks weren't going to be coming for a while. Since some of our communication devices were either out of service or lost we couldn't contact the school to say we were coming home earlier. I was almost twitching in my seat with excitement to see my Roza. I pretty much memorized her face, body, voice, smell and of course attitude.

I thought I might be gone for too long, and I might not be able to see her again. When we pulled up to the school's iron gates I could feel something wasn't right. When the van pulled next to the dhampir dorms and I seen all the crying I knew something wasn't right.

Everyone came put, some asking questions others just happy to be here and going to their rooms for well-deserved rest. I caught bits and bits of their conversations.

"How could she do that?" One girl asked another.

"I can't believe this! She was the best, now she's gone!" Meredith asked a novice through her tears. It seemed that I could almost erase those cries to one in particular.

I turned in the direction I head the screaming. A bus that usually took students off campus was crowded with around five teenage girls and some guardians, all of them hovered over something, or someone.

As I approached one of the guardians recognized me.

"Oh, Guardian Belikov, you got to comfort her, she's dealing with this pretty hard." One said. Confused I look at the middle of the mid circle to see light blond hair on the ground screaming and crying. She looked up at me and jumped on me, her thin arms going around me.

"She's gone Dimitri! She's gone, she's dead and it's my fault!" She screamed I pulled her away to look in her eyes.

"What happened?" I asked but the pieces were coming together, yet I refused to see the outcome.

"Ro-rose, she killed herself, Dimitri." She said through her tears.

**Two hours later**

Sitting up in my bed, the table lamp on, with one of my westerns open on my lap, yet I have no desire to read it. No tears fell, and for a moment I wondered if I lost my emotion. If only Rose created my emotions, every one of them, annoyance, irritation, friendliness, warmth, lust and most importantly – love. Now that she's gone. It's gone. She died, taking some of me with her.

I turned the bedside lamp off and put my book away. I lay in bed, with no intentions of falling to sleep.

"Why Rose?" I asked as one lone tear fell down my cheek.

**Three Years Later **

The people in the coffee shop must have caught up on our tension because some people were leaning in on our conversation. Others were leaving trying to avoid getting on the queen's bad side. Even if the queen just stormed out of the coffee shop minutes ago.

I can't blame her. I wanted to do the same thing when I came here and saw them. I was only at court because Viktoria graduated a year ago, and taken a one year break and now is ready to get a charge. I don't know what made her change her mind about being a guardian but I'm happy for her.

"So Dimitri, where have you've been these three years or so? I thought you were going to be Lissa's guardian." Christian said picking up his son and putting him on his lap.

"Originally." I said. "But I was needed for another assignment across seas." I explained.

"It's funny really." Christian said with a humorless laugh. "That when you're needed you're always away." I stiffened. Was he possibly blaming me for Rose's death? Was I to blame? After all the question I asked myself about Rose's death, that wasn't it. Adrian shot Christian a warning look and he just shrugged. Same old Christian. I wonder if he knew about me and Rose's relationship. If you can call it that.

A few awkward moments passed as we all just drank our coffee that was still warm, not like the air around us. Lissa came back, her eyes puffy and hair messy and make-up smeared. But she had some strange hope in her eyes. She sat down in her original seat and her guardians took their places.

"It's clear that none of us are over Rose's tragic death." She said, stumbling over the last couple of words. "It's been just about three years and we still haven't coped no matter how good of a brave face most of us put on." She said and her eyes flicked to me.

"So, tomorrow we're all going to work out our problems – together, and go to group therapy. There will be crying involved so bring some extra tissues." She said. She took her baby from Christian and left without another word.

"Therapy? If I'm gonna be crying it's because I have a killer hangover." Adrian said. Christian glared.

"No, we're all gonna do this! For Lissa, damn for all of us. Would Rose want us going around secretly still moping around. No, she'll say we better get off our pity party asses and suck it up."

Adrian smiled slightly. "Your right." He said. "But I still don't wanna go."

"You should go Adrian, Lissa's right. I don't even know you people and know that all of you are suffering from some sort of trauma." Viktoria said.

"Even you big brother." I just drank my coffee and ignored her comment.

Maybe therapy will help, Lissa anyways.

**A/N – Action coming up in the next chapter! How do you think I did with Dimitri's reaction to Rose's death? What about the therapy thing? Tell me your theories of the story! I know what's gonna happen I just wanna hear your thoughts! **


	3. Chapter 3

**Lissa's P.O.V **

"Worse timing ever, Lissa." Christian said while holding Andre. I sighed.

"It's not like I'm the only one at fault here Christian; you kicked in some sperm to make this happen too!" I said to loudly. It's not like anyone can hear us though, me and Christian's room in the royal palace is on the top floor with lots of open space around us, only my guardians might be able to hear us. Not anyone who will go gossiping though.

"I know, I know. It's just it's dangerous to bring another baby into the world right now, what will happen if that psycho tries to go after you again?" I didn't even wanna think about my recent close encounters with death. As queen you'll always have people against you, mostly those people will try to destroy you on the inside. Creating rumors, spreading lies, things like that. Desperate measures are when people try to kill you.

Poor Tatiana couldn't handle the pressure, almost immediately after I graduated someone tried to kill her, she resigned and she helped me with my campaign. Sadly after I was elected that person still went after her, succeeding in killing her with some sort of poison that burned her inside out. Horrible way to die.

I had three attempts that someone tried to kill me.

The first was when someone poisoned on of my dresses. It was a classic way to kill someone, like how people got rid of monarchs in the human world. Unlike for them I thought the dress was too big and had on of the maids try it on instead. When she starts screaming bloody murder everything sort of clicked into place. Luckily we were able to cut the dress off of her in time, she didn't look that great afterwards though and I used my magic to heal all her injuries, physical that is. The poor girl was traumatized and ended up leaving court and going somewhere secluded in the country.

The second one was at a dinner party when the desert came my cake was full of a poisonous powder that one trip down my throat, it would clog up making me choke. Unluckily the chef tried the cake out when I said I wasn't feeling well enough to eat it, a tell-tell sign of pregnancy. He tried to convince me to try his masterpiece by taking a bit. He fell dead only seconds afterwards.

The third and most recent was when I was reading files on a strigoi attack in Australia, an odd place to host an attack since Australia is sunny when it isn't having some storm or something. Tropical places like that strigoi stay away from which made the case much more unusual. Nevertheless I got a paper cut which I thought was normal, when I went to the doctor that night, which was luck on my part because I already had a scheduled appointment. The doctor inspected my paper cut at the end of the appointment because she asked me about my day and I brought up the paper cut since I haven't got one since I was twelve. With on look she could see it was infected because the skin around it was turning a sickening green color. She gave me some antibiotics which was enough to stop the infection – more investigating and it turns out it was another failed attempt to kill me.

Which makes this pregnancy that much more inconvenient. I always wanted my children to be close together in age yet when this bull came up I didn't want another child till this was fixed and it had to be fixed soon because I need to populate the Dragomir line, plus Andre can't do that for a while now.

"Don't you think I know that Christian, I don't want this baby or Andre in danger but we can't do anything about it now. What's done is done." He nodded and kissed Andre's head.

"Well now that, that talk is over, I guess we can be happy about the new addition to the family." I smiled. Christian was an amazing father, always firm yet gentle. Of course we only had one year of experience yet I believe we were doing a pretty good job so far. And underneath all the worry, I was happy to have this baby.

"Let's go back to sleep, we may be able to savage an hour left till we have to go to therapy." Christian said and walking away to put Andre back to sleep.

Man, I forgot about therapy. It was my idea after the break down yesterday. I walked into the kitchen, nothing but state of the art appliances. Stainless steel stove and refrigerator. The kitchen was great for cooking large meals. Granite countertops were in the middle for preparing food along with the ones that aligned the walls. Everything was professional and crisp, except some of the finger paintings that Andre drew or more like the paint he spilled on paper that me and Christian call paintings that were on the refrigerator door. All of his paintings were on there, nothing else except for the picture.

I plucked it from under the Mickey Mouse magnet and looked at it with tears in my eyes. It was a picture of me and Rose at a football game when we were on the run in Portland. It was one of my favorites and every time I pass it I feel like crying and laughing. We both were happy in the picture. Even though ninety percent of the time when I think of Rose, it's mostly about her horrible death, the other ten percent is about all the fun we used to have together. All the adventures we had together. I never filled the hole she left, not that I really wanted too. She was my best friend, that'll never change. There's no till death do us part with B.F.F's. It's forever and always.

**Britt's P.O.V**

Usually when I visited granddad I just sat there and talked to his headstone, not really caring about the hundreds of dead corpses under me, including granddads. I always leave a flower. Only the ones that used to be in my grandma's garden. When she died my granddad tended to the plants. I used to help him, which might be where I got my earth affinity from. My grandma had many flowers, from lilies to apple blossoms. Never roses, grandma considered them bad luck.

So when I saw Rosemarie Hathaway's headstone I thought it was an ironic joke played by the universe. I always thought when my grandma thought was crazy for thinking a pretty and common flower like the rose was unlucky. If anything it had to be those frisky dandelions, which is more of a weed than flower. But now – I believe roses are unlucky to.

Flashback

"Yeah, so that asshole cheated on me with that royal girl. I forgot her first name but she's part of the Zeklos clan. I always hated that family, they think they own everything but again, they are royals who usually do own everything though." I said to the headstone, when I got no reply, like always I brought my usual gift.

"Look granddad, I brought you lilies, grandma's favorite! Remember in her garden you always used to water and tend the lilies first and then the other plants." I put the three lilies on the dirt and hugged the headstone.

"I miss you so much granddad, mom does to yet she doesn't want to admit it, maybe she needs therapy." I said, it was an inside joke. My mother was a therapist at the royal court, which were a few miles from here. Granddad couldn't be buried in the royal court graveyard mainly because that was reserved for important royals and high class guardians. Granddad was neither, just a regular moroi like me. I used to live with granddad when he was still up and running but had to move to the royal court with my mom when he died. It isn't that I didn't like my mom, it's just that she didn't want me around royals.

She always complained about them, how they are bitchy and ungrateful. But she usually likes it when they visit her for therapy, she says that makes them a tad bit nicer. I believe my father was royal and my mother has always resented them since. I realized this when I was at her house a few summers ago and found a box of memories with her and my father, most where love letters and giant pay checks to keep things hush, hush. He didn't love her I knew that much, I saw the rejection letter that was stashed up there. He acted like he was resigning from an office job, not breaking some women's heart. Horrible part was that he was a Zeklos.

I never questioned my mother on it though, I knew it'll hurt her to much. I got up from the ground and looked around the graveyard. The sun was slowly going down, it was dusk, which means night is around the corner and I should be at court now. I could probably make it there in thirty minutes if I hurry up but for some reason I wanna be careless – who cares if strigoi come and chew me out. Right now I couldn't care less.

I walked around the graveyard, reading the headstones and admiring the art and poems on them. At one headstone I stopped dead in my tracks – no pun intended.

**Rosemarie Hathaway**

Horrible memories surfaced when I remembered that night three years ago. I was with my dhampir best friend, Tori, and we were getting wasted on the dhampir roof top like we did every weekend. Tori brought over some hard Russian Vodka and some fancy champagne she stole from some royal that was visiting, she also brought some juice box she took from the Elementary Campus so we can mix it with the vodka. She usually brings drugs to but she had to flush her stash since one of the teachers almost caught her. So we had to settle on the alcohol buzz for now.

We heard the commotion happening at the bottom of the building. We both looked down, standing on the edge which wasn't the smartest thing since we both were almost wasted. We saw people coming out screaming, others crying and some just looking confused and hurt. Guardians were trying to huddle them together and calm them down, like sheep. Confused I suggested we go check out what's going on. Tori wanted to take the stairs, I took a more dangerous and stupid approach. I was drunk and stupid, Tori was the same and didn't stop me. I was going to climb down by hoping from story to story. If I fail, I could very well die but I didn't care. The first few the stories so far so good.

When I got the third floor I peaked was about to launch myself to another window sill when the thing in the window caught my attention. A few guardians were huddle in there and a few moroi, who were some of the nurses at the school. The room was a mess, clothes everywhere the bed not made, blood splattered on the floor and a rope hanging in the middle of the room. Like someone hung themselves on it. Horrified I wanted to look away, yet I couldn't. One of the guardians picked up something from the ground and put it on the bed – it was a body.

The body, so pretty yet so sick. Her eyes with long lashes were closed and her dark brown hair sprayed around her on the pillow. Her arms had long and deep cuts with blood still coming out. Her skin was tan, yet had the sick feeling to it. By her chest not moving I could tell she was dead. The guardian that picked her up looked at me through the window.

"HEY!" He yelled which started me from my haze and I end up losing my balance and end up falling. A sharp pain shot through my left arm as the met me with a hard impact. I almost landed on someone next to me. I looked up to see a very handsome guardian with shoulder length brown hair and bottomless brown eyes not to mention he was totally ripped and tall too! I almost forgot my pain. He seemed like he wanted to go desperately inside the building because he kept looking at it, especially the window I just fell from. I wondered if he saw me peaking at it.

Apparently the inside battle he was fighting ended he asked me the standard questions of whether I was okay and things like that. He then carried me inside the nurses building, once a doctor came to me he was out in a flash, I never got a chance to say thanks. Even though he didn't catch me – which in my opinion would've been much more romantic. But he seemed like he couldn't careless about drunk girls falling out of the sky.

Later that night I got all the deeds about what happened. What happened was a novice committed suicide – Rosemarie Hathaway, who is like a celebrity on campus. Since I wasn't in the inner circle and just a freshman at the time I didn't get the 411 on what really happened like why she committed suicide. Instead of tending to my broken arm I was busy tracing rumors around the school trying to find out. Which lead me no where. I told my mom what happened – everything including me getting drunk on the roof top. My mom told me I should write down what I feel – I'm not a writer so I drew it instead. I drew her dead body, the image that was burned into my head from that day forth.

As I look at her headstone now I just feel sadness. Pity for her friends, and the bottomless brown eyed stranger. I had no doubt in my mind that they knew each other. I never found out about him or his connection to all this but they just seemed to click together. I remember hearing the cries of Princess Dragomir, now Queen Dragomir but whatever. They were best friends, I couldn't even imagine losing Tori. Especially in that manner.

I bent down so I could see everything the gravestone said.

**Here lies Rosemarie Hathaway.**

**Beloved daughter, friend, and novice.**

Under it, which seemed kind of comical and not something you'll see on a regular head stone it said.

**Also don't forget she was a total Badass!**

**Forever Missed Rose.**

I laughed, apparently she was very loved but of course she was – she seemed like the girl who would stick up for a friend. I traced the letters with my finger till I felt something under me. Shocked I shot up and looked at the ground.

I swear I saw it move. I leaned against another headstone. Someone named Larry Burt.

I penned my eyes on the ground, daring it to move again. Then it did. This time I hopped over the headstone and hid behind it with only my eyes peaking over the top.

I definitely wasn't imaging this now. I hand shot up from the ground – like it does it the scary movies and I screamed like a blond bimbo head as the hand grasp the dirt trying to pull itself up.

I swear at that moment I might of just pissed on Larry Burt's grave – talk about disrespect of the dead.

End of Flashback.

"Your dead – I saw you dead! As a corpse, not a pretty little alive person." I said looking up and down at her, wide-eyed and shocked.

"Yeah, I was there genius." Rosemarie Hathaway said.

**A/N – Next chapter a therapy session and maybe the experience of being awakened from the dead? Not so sure yet. **


	4. Chapter 4

**Rose's P.O.V **

Decay, dirt and perfume lightly tingled my nose. The air around me was almost non-existent. I had to take low shallow breaths and try not to gasp for air. I turned my head hoping to get some air yet found none. I dared to open my eyes. To pitch blackness.

I could usually get some sunlight from the window, maybe Lissa put those new curtains in. God – that dream was horrible, I feel like apologizing to her even though I did nothing wrong. Only dreamt it. I tried to sit up but was put down after only three inches. Confused I tried to feel around my room yet it seemed as if I was in a box. The walls were plush and silky, yet smelled horrible.

Wait…

Panic took over my body. Maybe that wasn't a dream. What if…

I tried to suck in the air that wasn't there and began to pound on the box. No – coffin. I screamed but it was only tiring me out. I tried to claw at the fabric and managed to rip a few pieces but not enough to get me out. The lack of air was starting to make me dizzy and before I knew it my attempts were getting weaker and weaker, till I passed out.

***Three Hours Later***

I came gasping for air, air that wasn't there. Memories came back to me and I had the urge to cry yet I couldn't waste the energy. I had to think straight yet it was hard – the air…I needed air!

I looked around the coffin – everything was pitch black so I had to feel my way around it. I finally found the line where the coffin would open at and tried to pry it open yet it wasn't locked, it was just covered with six feet of dirt. I turned around which was hard and was hunched over and my knees pressed against my chest while my back was at the top of the coffin. The position smacked the air out of me, not that it was much to begin with. No wonder I didn't become brain dead yet.

Wait – how long was I in here? I don't feel decayed so it couldn't be that long right? A couple of days at the most. I couldn't ponder on it to much longer because I was running out of time. I pushed with what little strength I had, I managed to lift it a little and dirt poured in – at least I guess, I felt it and heard it – can't see it. I pushed again, more dirt coming in and soon the coffin was almost filled with it. The little opening is enough for me to crawl out. I crawled forward and hit another coffin. I tried to shutter but the lack o air was making me dizzy. This time no air was with me. I clawed my way up. My hand spouted up and it felt cold. Air! I'm close! I crawled more, and more. Just when my body was about to give out I hobbled out of the ground – at least my upper half anyways.

I was to busy gasping for air to get fully out of the ground. When I got enough air I crawled all the way out. Then I opened my eyes. Looking around, even the dimmest of light hurting my eyes. It was sunset giving the sky an orange color. I smiled and looked down at myself.

My arms were skinny and looked slightly green – losing its perfect tan. I see major sun bathing in my future. I can't even imagine how my face looks. The dress I was wearing was black. The top a tight corset and the skirt were short with black stockings and I must have lost the shoes somewhere down there. The dress reminded me of the one I wore when I had the lust charm on me. I smiled at the memory. Yet I had the urge to cry, I failed him.

I wonder if he's back from the battles. Probably not. That is if he's alive.

I heard something shuffle behind me and I instantly became alert, but my body was weak and I tripped over my own feet and landed on the dirt of my own grave. How embarrassing. I managed to sit up anyways, leaning against my headstone. I looked at the source of the noise.

A girl, about sixteen or seventeen with long platinum blond hair with brown eyes. She was Moroi and as curvy as a moroi could get. She looked frightened to.

"Rose." She said hiding behind the gravestone. I straightened up, and peered over at her.

"Who are you?" I asked my voice rasp and dry. She poked her head out again. She looked at me before coming out from behind the grave.

"I'm Britt Patterson, you're dead." She said eyes wide.

"Some people call me Rose but whatever." I said I can't believe I managed to crack a joke at this time. But it seemed to warm her up – just a little.

"Your dead, I saw you dead! As a corpse, not a pretty little alive person." She said again.

"Yeah, I was there genius." I said rolling my eyes. She backed up again and for a moment I thought she was going to run but she just stood there, looking at me.

"Do you know how long it's been since my funeral?" I wanted to get an accurate reading on how long I've been down there. She stayed silent for a while before answering.

"I don't know, about three years."

Three years! My eyes widened and the urge to cry came up again.

Three years – I was dead for three years, how could I survive down there?

Maybe I didn't.

**Lissa's P.O.V**

"So let's get started shall we?" Dr. Patterson said. She was a middle aged moroi, short curly blond hair and brown eyes, skinny like all moroi and pale yet had that friendly welcoming look about her. "Will one of you want to tell what you're doing here?" Adrian huffed. We were all here – me, Christian, Dimitri and Adrian. Viktoria came for support. Andre was staying at Mia and Eddie's since I didn't trust him with anyone else. Since no one spoke I decided to.

"We're here clearing the air about Rose's suicide." I made sure to say suicide since the way she died has a major impact of how we handled it. If she died killing strigoi, we'll miss and mourn her but we'll look back at her with joy and pride not sadness and despair. Dr. Patterson wrote something down on her notebook and smiled back at us.

"Why doesn't each of you tell me about how you felt about Rose – before her death." Dr.

Patterson said. "Starting with Adrian." I looked over at who was sitting causally on a leather seat. We were all sat in a square with a couch and two leather seats with Dr. Patterson's seat in front. Me, Viktoria and Christian sat on the couch while Adrian sat on the seat to our right and Dimitri on our right. Adrian groaned.

"Why me?" He asked her. She shrugged. "Fine," He huffed.

He stayed silent for a while longer before talking. "I was in love with Rose. She was funny, pretty, sarcastic and she wanted me to get my life together. She was the forbidden fruit – she was in love with someone else and I knew I could never have her. I couldn't just be friends though. Not unless I got over her which was impossible. She was overall really fun to be around and even though being around her was torture it was still a relief from my madness." Dr. Patterson didn't comment just wrote something else down in her notepad.

"What about you Christian – what do you have to say about Rose?" Christian sighed.

"Rose was…." He couldn't find the right words. "Rose was like a girl version of me. We were too alike which annoyed the hell out of me – and her. People with the same personalities can't be in the same room without some fight starting. From the first moment I met her I knew we'll be bumping heads. I thought she was psycho and she thought I was 'dangerous'. But due to Lissa we had to see each other more than either of us liked, which in some way warmed me up to her and vise versa. Soon I start to see her as a sister and not an annoying problem." Dr. Patterson didn't comment, again just wrote something on her notepad.

"Vasilisa, your thoughts on Rose." I felt my throat tighten. What could I say about Rose that wasn't gonna end up in me bursting into tears? I realized everyone was looking at me – I've been silent for to long.

"Um, Rose was…" God, I didn't even have to say words and it still would end up in tears. My stomach began to churn, I'm regretting that double bacon and egg sandwich. I stood up abruptly. "I have to go to the bathroom."

Dr. Patterson was about to say something else when her lamp – next to Viktoria exploded. I jumped and Viktoria and Dimitri we're already on alert. The nauseas feeling just kept getting stronger. Dimitri and Viktoria ushered all the moroi out of Dr. Patterson's office into hallway which lead to the foyer of the building. Dimitri went back into the room while Viktoria guarded us out here. Christian called my guards in case this wasn't just some freak accident. My guards arrived when Dimitri came out of the room – holding something in his palm.

He opened it to revel what looked like a tiny missile.

"It's a dart – it was filled with poisonous gas, which caused the lamp to explode." He explained.

"Was it aimed at Lissa?" Christian asked. Dimitri nodded.

"When she got up the dart was already in the air and instead of hitting her it got the lamp. It's a miracle it didn't hit Viktoria or Christian." It was all too much to take and my earlier discomfort came up again before I knew it was a hunched over a near by trash can throwing up all my stomach's contents.

Dr. Patterson decided at this time to say something.

"Well I guess we can finish this session another time – when everything is settled."

Like they ever will be.


	5. Chapter 5

**Britt's P.O.V**

"You know I don't get you Rose." I said as I gave another pull. "Usually people try to run from their terrors – not sell them."

"Stop talking – you'll waste your energy."

"What energy? I'm a Moroi! I'm weak and thin boned; people like me don't lift heavy objects." I'm pretty sure Rose could have pulled the coffin out of the ground herself, but she hasn't eaten or drank anything for three years. It surprised me that she could do this much, she could barely stand several minutes ago.

I gave another tug and so did she and we managed to get the coffin out of the ground and on to the ground. Rose hunched over it, out of breath. I'm pretty sure I could fill a pool with my sweat. It was a summer night and the air was stale and hot. I looked over at Rose who was still hunched over, but she was still – incredibly still. For a moment I panicked thinking this whole encounter been a horrible hallucination on my part.

She moved and sat up, her bony arms resting on the oak coffin. She really needed to eat.

"You need food." I said and dug into my pocket pulling out three shelled sunflower seeds. I put them in her hand. She looked at me then back at the sunflower seeds.

"I'm not eating these – they came out of you're pocket, who knows what else is in there." She said but still held the seeds in her hand.

"Well I have a quarter and a cotton ball in my pocket for your information and I don't care if it came out of my butt crack, you need food or you're going to pass out and I can't haul your skinny ass back to court." I said my hands over my chest and started her down. She rolled her eyes and looked back at the seeds. She peeled the shells off and sucked down the tiny seeds.

"Well it wasn't a gourmet meal by anyone's standards but I guess it was something, thanks." I smiled, people rarely thanked me, yet again I hardly did anything to be thankful for.

"We can go to my house, my mom still has left over Roast beef from yesterday, you're free to pig out on it if you want." I offered. She looked as if she was about to accept the offer yet shut her mouth.

"Is Lissa there, at court?" Lissa? Oh, she must mean Queen Vasilisa.

"Yeah, the Queen's there but she usually hauled up in her chambers or at some royal party. We can easily sneak in without being seen, well if you don't bring the coffin." I said pointing my finger to the coffin. It was a nice coffin, hard oak wood with little cravings that looked like vines and the inside was plush but smelt horrible.

"Queen? Lissa's queen?" I nodded. I might have to catch her up on the past three years she missed out on – yet I had to get her some food or this will be for nothing.

"We can play catch up later – right now you need rest, food and a shower. No offense but the smell of death isn't the new hot fragrance – nor will it ever be." She smiled sadly.

"We can drag the coffin to your place – hid it somewhere and in the morning you'll sell it." She said. "I can use the money to buy some apartment or something till I figure everything out."

"Why can't you go to the queen, you guys were friends right?" She nodded and smiled sadly.

"We were yet…" She paused. "She'll hate me, I hate me. What I did was selfish, stupid and a spur of the moment. I could never forgive myself for that." She brushed some tears that managed to come down her face.

"I missed three years of my life – her life is better without me, she's queen now. Most likely married to fire crotch and is happy in college or something. She really doesn't need me to ruin all of it." I wanted to comfort Rose – yet I had no idea how, I'm still in shock and coming to terms of what happened and here Rose was having a break-down and I stood there like a statue, doing nothing at all. Surprised by myself I walked over to her and gave her a gentle hug. She smelt horrible and I wanted to revolt just being three feet from her but my noise could handle it – she needed me more.

"Everything will work out in the end." I said. "Hopefully anyways." I couldn't see her face but I felt her smile.

"Yeah hopefully."

"We're here." I said parking my pick up truck in the drive-through, my mom's Mercedes not here. I got my car from Granddad, I didn't want a flashy car like moms even though she wasn't royal she could afford the best for me and her. Her job was pretty high paying, especially with the nutcases that live here. The rusty pick-up truck though came in handy when we needed to carry the coffin. With more pushing we got it into my car and used an old blanket to cover it. The guards at the gate didn't think anything of it.

Rose got out and looked at my house. It was a typical house, with a green cut grass and a little garden with a brown welcome mat by the door. It was two stories because only mom and I lived her. She moved from her fancy condo when I moved in. Her condo was two bedrooms but this was three – for when my friends stay over. I loved how she changed her lifestyle for me. She never made me feel like a burden though.

It was early morning for the moroi. Mom must have left for work a couple of minutes before I came which mean she won't be back till way later. Maybe she might drop by at lunch but that's it. With even more pushing, we got Rose's coffin into our basement into an abandoned little room there. Mom was going to use it as a wine cellar yet realized she didn't drink alcoholic beverages but I did and hid my stash down here – now I hid Rose's coffin.

With a loud bang it hit the concrete floor. It was oak though, the toughest of all woods. Since my mom wasn't coming for a while I could easily sell this before she got home. There's a funeral shop across court who would gladly take this off my hands. For some good money to. But business is first.

"You take a shower while I make you a meal." I said. "Then we can sell this coffin."

"Do you have any clothes I can wear?" She asked. I looked at her outfit, I'm pretty sure it looked good on her before she lost her curves but it was still a very nice and expensive outfit. I thought about her question for a moment before answering.

"Yeah, my friend Tori left some clothes here a while ago. She's about your size so you'll be able to fit." Tori was about as curvy as Rose was, I'm pretty sure some of the clothes might be too big. We went up to my room which was light blue with peace signs over the room and some cryptic poetry I found off the internet. I looked at my dresser and pulled out a crop top that said 'Make Love, Make peace, Make Money' and some distressed jeans and a blue pair of socks.

"Bathroom's down the hall. Shampoo, soap and some bath beads are in their too along with lotion and other stuff, so knock yourself out. Join me in the kitchen when you're done." She nodded before going down the hall. I made two plates of Roast beef with some sides and Kool-aid with three cubes of ice in each glass. About twenty minutes later Rose came down stairs with her hair in a messy bun at the top of her head with strands on it coming down her face.

She looked and smelt better but she was far from recovery. We both ate in an awkward, comfortable silence. I wanted to ask questions and I could tell she wanted to as well. After breakfast I put the dishes in the dishwasher and I saw Rose making herself at home on my couch watching some stupid infomercial. The drawback on having your days at night. I sat next to her at a comfortable distance.

"So you wanna get going or are you gonna stay here?" I asked. She shrugged.

"I can't go out – those royals are out there." She made 'out there' sound like a zombie invasion was going on. Okay, to soon for the zombie talk. "It might get back to Lissa, they'll say some Rosemarie look-a-like is here and they'll hurt her." I looked at Rose with masked pity. The main reason she doesn't want to see her old friends is because she'll think they'll hate her. I talk to my mom about that.

"Well I'll go clean your coffin out and you can help me take it to my car." Even though I didn't ask her she helped clean the coffin out because lots of dirt was in there. I even put a little green tree in there – the ones you use for cars because the coffin smelt like a dead body been in there – of course it was. I also noticed some tears at the cloth on top of the coffin, Rose must tried getting out. After an hour of doing this we put the coffin in my trunk.

Rose stayed home and continued to watch that vacuum commercial. I was a little worried to keep her at home because she did commit suicide but I brushed it off. When I pulled up to Sorrow's Funeral Pallor I was a tad worried they wouldn't take the coffin, I mean who sells coffins and secondly who buys them so I was convinced they didn't have some trade in booth.

When I stepped into the, the air smelt of…well…sorrow. Some people's eyes were puffy, some where already crying others kept blank expressions. I went to a sales lady who was consoling an elderly moroi woman who was weeping into a white handkerchief.

I gently tapped her shoulder and she guided the woman into chair and came to talk to me. Her name tag said her name was Katy.

"I'm here to sell a coffin." I told Katy. She was at first confused so I quickly launched into a fake story before she could turn me down.

"My granddad bought it a while ago, for my grandmother when she passed. Yet in her will it said she wanted to be cremated instead so he had nothing to do with the coffin and just kept it in his basement. When he died me and my mother wanted to put him in the coffin yet his will said he wanted to be cremated as well so we have nothing to do with it." I said. "Except sell it."

"I don't know – we don't usually do this type of thing." Katy said.

"Its pure oak, with satin lining, its net worth is about 90,000." Katy's eyes widened and she looked at me – or more scanned me. She must think because I have a 90,000 worth coffin – a number I made up on the spot by the way – she thinks I'm royal. I didn't dress like it though, with jeans with dirt smears on it and my hair crazy, not exactly 'royal worthy'.

"Okay but I must take a look at it though." I nodded and lead her to my car and ripped the blanket off the back to show her. I liked the way this was going, she approved.

"Alright, I'll give you 50,000 for it."

**Lissa's P.O.V**

I wanted another therapy session tomorrow. All because we had a near-death experience didn't mean I was going to stop our 'healing process'. My suggestion met groans from Adrian. He obviously didn't want to do this ever again but I know it'll help him more than me. Before we left the building she gave us a suggestion which even met silence from Adrian.

Visit Rose's grave.

When I first visited her grave it was when I first moved to court. I had them have the funeral at St. Vlads yet I wanted her body near court so I could visit. It was when I found out that I could be queen. It was more tear filled than wanted and I didn't even get many words out before I start sobbing like a baby on her grave. I just kept telling her I missed and loved her. Sometimes I scream at the grave other times I just sat here, more times I had spirit's darkness take over me and I'll claw at the grave trying to dig her up. I never got more than a few inches before Christian will pull me away from the cemetery, me kicking and screaming.

So my first thought was no, yet I haven't visited Rose's grave since Andre was born. What kind of friend was I? Maybe that was the reason she killed herself – I wasn't good enough.

Adrian saw my expression and for the first time he looked as if this therapy stuff might just work. He agreed with Dr. Patterson before any of us could reject. I shot him a glare but he just shrugged and said. "You need it." I nodded sadly.

On the way there Adrian bought a dozen white Rose's with a red one in the middle.

We were in a SUV, Dimitri was driving and I sat in the passenger seat. I looked out the window seeing all the buildings fly pass us. My mind started to wander which is never a good thing.

I started to think about the time when I last seen Rose – alive that is.

She looked so troubled, so weak. I'd rather go shopping that comfort her. What person does that? Needless to say she threw me out anyways but I should of persisted in staying with her – like a good friend. I'll always hate myself for that.

By a twist of fate a song came on the radio which was currently on a Pop station and just finished playing a Britney Spears song and then Christina Aguilera song came on and it was none other than Hurt.

_I would hold you in my arms, I would take the pain away  
>Thank you for all you've done, forgive all your mistakes<br>There's nothing I wouldn't do to hear your voice again  
>Sometimes I wanna call you but I know you won't be there<em>

I quickly turned off the radio and the awkwardness in the care rose. Everyone seemed to be waiting for me to have another breakdown. Which I was seconds from actually doing. When we pulled up to the cemetery it was night of course and gave it an extra spooky feeling.

The cemetery was for Moroi and Humans, since we didn't really 'own' it. Since Rose wasn't yet a guardian she couldn't be buried in the court's graveyard so this was second best. I took a deep breath and walked past the black gates. At the entrance was a statue of three weeping cupids, all looking down at the graves and a sentence engraved at the bottom.

_We'll see our lost friends in the morrow – forever will damned to live today. _

I looked at the cupid a few more seconds before going to where I knew Rose's grave was. I followed the cobble path till I came to where most moroi and dhampirs were buried. I looked around for Rose's grave and when I spotted it… I was speechless. Everyone's eyes were now on where I was looking. We all shared the same look of disbelief. All of us ran into a sprint till we got to it.

The dirt – all of was piled to the side, like when they put her in the ground. We all gather around and peered down the hole.

Empty.

I huffed.

"Who would have done this?" I asked a bit shaken.

"A psycho person." Adrian answered.

"Or a regular freak." Christian said.

"Well there's only one way to find out." Dimitri said and looked over to the building – where they keep all of files and organizes burial spots and stuff. "Maybe someone in there can tell us." I nodded before looking down at the empty grave again. A lone tear fell down and I took the flowers Adrian gave me and tossed them into the grave.

**AN – Thanks for all of the reviews! I'm happy you guys like the story and I made this chapter extra long for that ! Till next time people -*- **


	6. Chapter 6

**Lissa's P.O.V**

"Britt Patterson – troublesome kid, get's into lot more trouble since her grandfather died." The grave attendant told us. "She visits his grave every once in a while and gives him flowers and things other than that she's usually just come and go." The grave attendant is human and surprisingly knows about the Moroi world and also happens to be good friends with Britt's mom – who was our therapist. We couldn't get much out of the human since she didn't know anything.

Our next step – Dr. Patterson's door step, yet I had things to do. Everyone did and even though we wanted to face our fears – we still wasn't ready to go plowing through it. If we find Britt we'll most likely find Rose – her body and I couldn't do that. Not after three years – not ever.

So we drove back to court. I had a meeting to go to and my guardians came with me, like always. It was late morning for us Moroi which meant it was around 11:00 pm, our session with Dr. Patterson was way over till tomorrow. I walked with my guardians to the palace where a meeting was being held over an unknown issue. When I first heard about this I thought it was the Age Degree, which I thought I took care of years ago yet those royals always pushed that. Even some of those who were on my side those years ago are 'rethinking' their decision. It might be because some of the dhampirs are going rogue. Dropping out of the academies and going to human schools while mindlessly killing strigoi. Which in turn is killing them, yet I have to admit strigoi numbers are dropping. Which are saving moroi lives, yet at what cost?

When I came into the meeting room everyone grew silent – which was beyond odd because usually people only get louder when I come in. Them trying to get me on their side, them being silent and just looking at me made me feel out of place, more than usual that is.

"Don't let me stop the conversation people." I said being very queenly like. "What's the issue?" I asked my seat at the head of the table. Some exchanged glances others gave me pity filled looks.

"Your majesty, with all due respect we believe this issue is some what personal to you and due to the fact that we don't want damage your emotional psyche we suggest that you let us handle this matter ourselves." I'm shocked; really they always want me here – just to hear them complain really. Plus I'm queen – it's my duty to be here and listen and correct issues.

I looked at Celeste Conta who replaced the other Conta Princess who stepped down due to old age. Celeste was around her mid sixties with white fluffy hair and thin lips, she could pass as a cookie cutter grandma yet she wasn't. Hell I wasn't sure she even had grandkids.

"No matter how personal, it's still an issue that I'm gonna deal with. Now what is it?" I asked.

Everyone squirmed in their chairs before Celeste answered.

"That everyone who is bonded around the world are ending their lives." She said her voice serous and void of all emotion. This made my previous statement crumble before my eyes. Right then I wanted to throw in the towel and run, run far away. Yet I know doing that will only prove that I'm crazy and emotional.

Maybe when I walked away from the graveyard hoping to escape my problems only made me run head on. I tried to clear my head of the horrid thoughts about _her _which worked when I thought about the people like me out there – the ones who are grieving their friends right now, their minds wondering 'what if'. Like I am. After a brief pause I mentioned for her to continue.

"Well these cases don't affect the bond mate with spirit ability but Shadow-kissed. This came to our attention three days ago when a teenage girl came to court having these theories about her bond mate's death and how it might be linked to the others – along with Rose's." At that moment everyone held their breath, no one spoke her name. Not in my face anyways, yet Celeste was doing it. Brave old lady. I got up from my seat, straightened out my blouse and looked at Celeste.

"We'll figure this all out once I speak to the girl."

**A/N – Sorry haven't updated in a while but will soon. Hope you guys have happy holidays.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Rose's P.O.V**

"I can't believe you nailed a house in only one day." Britt said as she looked around in awe at my new apartment. It was only about forty-five minutes from court and on the seventh floor of the complex giving me an awesome view of the city. Plus a community outdoor pool was just down the street – it'll be a perfect place to get my tan back since I was as pale as a strigoi. But before that happens I need to get my figure back. The meal at Britt's filled me up yet didn't add much meat.

But before that I need to furnish my house. It had one bedroom along with a large bathroom with shower and bath. Also included is small kitchen that connected to the living room, only being separated by kitchen counters with wooden countertops. The floors were sun kissed wood panes. The living room was next to the glass doors that lead out onto the porch. All of it has yet to be decorated and I had around 30,000 dollars left since the apartment cost 20,000. I plan to use the rest to buy furniture, appliances and nice clothes since I can't keep up this life style forever and I'm gonna need a job.

It was odd how I was planning my life ahead of me, it was odd how I handled it. As Britt put it I should be going to Lissa and asking for money. Yet I couldn't face Lissa, not yet and maybe not ever.

"So you planning on sleeping on the floors or are you gonna buy some things?" Britt asked as she sat on top of one of the counters.

I walked back inside since I was viewing the city around me from the porch. I closed the door and smiled at her.

"Sure but it'll be awfully lonely here…by myself…all alone…." I said trying to get her to see the point. She chuckled and kicked her legs back and forth.

"No if I'm not home by sunrise my mom will be panicked." She said.

"Say you're sleeping over at a friend's house or something."

"What friends? I have one friend and she's in Romania visiting her father." She said. "She'll be gone till August when school's about to start again."

"Don't you have like a boyfriend or something?" I asked. She flinched and I instantly regretted saying anything.

"I did but he dumped me for some royal trash. I gave everything to that loser, we even shared a beer once and if anyone knows anything about me it's that I never share my beer!" She ranted and then a comfortable silence engulfed us before she asked the dreaded question.

"Did you have a boyfriend before…you know?" I was somewhat happy she said 'you know' instead of suicide but the question rang through my head.

"Dimitri." I whispered, I could barely ever hear myself but Britt could.

"Who's Dimitri?" She asked. I looked up at her to see her eyes filled with curiosity.

"He was my mentor at St. Vladimirs. I got him because Lissa and I ran away." I said. "Anyways when they caught us and the headmistress made Dimitri mentor and we end up falling in love. We knew the problems yet we were so in love… that we could of literally faced anything. That is till I screwed it up and killed myself." The thought of it made me want to kill myself. "He's the only person I'll ever feel comfortable talking to." I said.

"Great!" Britt said. "I'll find him and bring him here."

"No that was just a figurative-"

"Nonsense, I'll bring him here so you guys can connect." Britt said hoping off the counter and heading towards the door. "Trust me it'll help you're healing process or whatever you wanna call it."

"Wait where are you going? He might not be at court."

"Oh, your right. Do you know who his charge is?" Britt asked.

"Well he was supposed to guard Lissa but he promised he'll make something workout so we both don't guard her. Since I'm not around anymore maybe he'll still her guardian." I said.

"Well even if he's not they keep all guardian files at court, I could easily track him down." I nodded.

"Alright do what you have to do." I said.

"Good, now where will you go?" I thought for a minute.

"I'll be here; its night and I don't wanna run into any strigoi." I said looking out the window. I gave Britt Dimitri's description and she left.

**Britt's P.O.V**

As I drove to court, my mind started to think which is never a good thing. I momentarily though of just ditching Rose, yet I could never do that. First I'm too attached. Second she knows where I live, third I feel sorry for her.

I drove in court and parked my car in my drive way, I'll walk the rest of the way. I looked around and saw many people going back and forth, on there phones or just walking somewhere. Everyone here is busy, always have somewhere to be. That's court life for you.

I'm positive I can't get into the palace – that's for royals and guest only and guardians. But this Dimitri fellow might be there. I decided to just walk to the admission building where they keep files and such. Bryant works there and can get me some info. Bryant is my mom's B.F. Gross.

I walked to the admission's building and low and behold Bryant was sitting at his desk and glaring some paper that was on this desk. Bryant is a guardian who looks over a Zeklos lord I was a bit surprised that my mom was dating a dhampir, almost as surprised that I was dating a royal jackass.

"Hey there Bryant." I said causally. He looked up and smiled at me.

"Hey Britt,"

"I need information on a guardian; can you get that for me?" I ask getting to the point.

"I usually could yet I can't – they're looking for you girlie." I raised an eyebrow.

"Who's looking for me?"

"The Queen's entourage. Her husband and some other people." He said. "If anyone see's you their supposed to bring you to the queen or to her husband." He gave me a cocky grin before saying. "But since you're you I won't tell but you better make a bee-line out of court. If the queen's involved it's something serous. What did you do to get in that much trouble?"

I wanted to scream at him saying I'm currently hiding the queen's best friend – who I might add has been dead for three years! Instead I just smiled a walked out of the building – not before snatching a hat off the rack. It was a floppy sun hat that looks like it's from the early 1900's but it covers my face so whatever.

I guess getting Rose's lost love is gonna be harder than I thought.


	8. Chapter 8

**Lissa's P.O.V**

I was happy when someone said they spotted Britt, I was one my way walking to the throne room where the girl was. A gate guard saw her enter court several minutes ago. Lucky us. When we reached the throne room my guardians lined the walls while I took my seat. When I sat down I realized no one else was in the room.

"Where is she?" I ask my advisor. My advisor was Gabriella Ozera, I chose her because we shared the same views and she was less stuck up then the other royals. She was only two years older than me. Gabriella looks on her phone and text someone.

"She went out for a breath of fresh air – she should be back any second." I was relieved – it'll give me time to catch my thoughts. I believe I was still in shock – I was about to talk to someone who went through the same thing I've been through. Yet this person wanted to blame someone about it. But I have to admit, having all these shadow-kissed committing suicide around the same time of each other.

Maybe they heard of Rose's story and thought she had the right idea…

I wiped the tear that came down my eye as a guardian brought in who I'm guessing is the teenager who lost her bond mate. I could see gold in her aura, she's a spirit user alright but also darkness was there.

She was grieving. A lot.

Her dark blue eyes were almost blood shot due to crying so much. Her curly red hair clashed awkwardly with her eyes. Little freckles were sprayed over he nose and cheeks. Like every moroi she was tall and slim yet she was graceful with her movements

Both her and the guardian gave a small bow before the guardian began to speak.

"Your highness, this is Aurelia Tudor." The guardian said.

"Your highness." Aurelia said with another bow, in her voice I could make out a Romanian accent. I looked over at the guardian.

"You may leave now, thank-you." The guardian gave a small bow again before swiftly leaving.

"Sit." I told Aurelia and gestured to the couch near the wall. I crossed my ankles. She walked over to the couch and plopped on it – unusual for when in front of me but I didn't mind, it's actually soothing to see her so comfortable around me.

"So, Aurelia, tell me about your bond mate." A sad smile flickered over her lips. I studied her aura and saw more darkness but specks of light when she though of her bond mate.

"Leslie was great, always happy – so happy it was almost annoying." She said. "We met when her family moved from Canada to Romania and she end up going to my school, that was when we were around ten. Everyone wanted to be friends with her since she was the new kid from an unfamiliar country. Leslie and I pretty much hit it off and we've been inseparable since the day we met." I smiled when I remembered the time me and Rose met and just like Aurelia and Leslie – we were inseparable.

"Around the time of her suicide, I was sixteen; am sixteen actually, this was only three months ago – then we've been bonded for two years. She died during a skiing accident that happened on vacation. Anyways I was working with spirit, not a lot – I've done worse but I was pestering her about taking darkness away from me. We got in several fights about it; she seemed to be hiding something from me. I would always yell at her and she would completely shut me out. It was annoying to say the least." Her demure changed into something darker.

"Her last day, she told me the truth. She literally can't help it. For about a month she told me she's been sucking darkness from me and she had no control. She didn't even really take darkness from me often so it was a surprise that she had no control. I wasn't pushing it into her anyways. I snuck out of the campus to find a spirit user that lived near the mountains, it was a three hour drive and I knew the lady could help us on what to do. Leslie couldn't come, she had detention. While I was at the spirit user's house she commented on my aura, she said I lost my bond mate. I thought that was like a figure of speech but I also felt the lost that was unbearable – I believed her, yet I didn't want to. The darkness came rushing into me seconds later and when I got back it was all confirmed." I remembered when I had that feeling, I didn't know what it meant but I just knew in my gut that it had something to do with Rose.

We sat there for about another minute or so before I spoke.

"Thanks for sharing." I said quietly. I didn't really want to elaborate on it; it reminded me to much of Rose's experience except mine was worse. Leslie and Aurelia left their friendship on a somewhat high note – I and Rose left ours in a fight. Note the way to go.

"So what about those conspiracy theory's of yours?" I asked since I was interested. She took a deep breath.

"Let's just say, it would change what you think about Rose, Shadow-kissed and moroi."

**Britt's P.O.V**

I sat on the bench outside the palace, causally drinking my Pepsi. I doubt the guardians will be looking for me so close to where the queen is. Plus being here will get my closer to my target – that is if he's here and not somewhere else. I thought my chances of finding him where slim to none.

Yet I had to try right?

I looked down at my watch. Midnight, damn I've been here two hours and still am empty handed. I wanted to go to Rose and say that I was unsuccessful yet I didn't really do anything. Most of the time I was just dodging guardians.

I looked at the door of the palace, some people came out and others went in. No one of importance except…

"Britt?" I tried to hide under my sun hat yet he was persistent. "Britt?" He said again. I sighed.

"Hello Kyle." I said to my ex-boyfriend. He waves. Kyle was cute, with shaggy brown hair that went in his eyes and piercing green eyes. He was quite the looker – plus he was a rich royal moroi. The main fact that he was rich got me hooked. He once bought me a ten thousand dollar charm bracelet. Tori told me I was a gold digger in the making. I admit I went out with him and slept with him to get the bling – but that's not the reason I fell in love with him.

To bad that stopped one day when he dumped me.

And so the heart breakers heart is broken…life's cruel isn't it?

I stood up and looked Kyle in the eyes. He took in my appearance, which wasn't good since I had muddy shoe's from the gave yard and dirt was all over my clothes.

"What you've been up to?" He asked with a shy smile.

"Nothing much." Except for aiding a dead girl.

He smiled; I used to live for that smile. "Nothing except for buying old lady hats." Old lady…Oh, I took my hat off and hugged it to my chest.

"So what have you've been up to?" I ask.

"Nothing much." He answers while leaning back on his heals.

"Nothing except for screwing royal bitches." I said my voice cold and unforgiving. But I'm sure if he asked for me back I would be in his arms in a nanosecond. He stopped rocking on his heels.

"Look Britt." I cut him off.

"No, I get it. You go for the slutty royal type." I said. "What is her name again, Skimp, Score, Skank!" I said raising my voice higher and higher.

"Skye, her name's Skye."

"Really, I couldn't tell…"

"BRITT PATTERSON!" Someone yelled I turned and saw Christina Ozera coming over towards me. With a baby on his chest. WTF? 

Wait…Christian Ozera! The Queen's husband! I quickly put my hat on.

A little to late Britt…

I pushed past Kyle who was saying something about forgiveness and ran as far as my fit could carry me.

Someone else joined him seconds later. Another Moroi but I was pretty sure guardians will pop up anytime soon. I rounded several corners in hope of losing them yet I was also a moroi who couldn't run worth a shit. Christian on the other hand was a endorser of moroi fighting which meant he had to pick up a few tricks on the way.

I looked behind me for a split second and saw the coast clear. I breathed out and turned my head and walked forward.

Right into someone.

I looked up; this person was massive, about 6'7, built and tan. He was also good looking with brown shoulder length hair and brown eyes….

Wait…

This is the guy who I fell next to at St. Vlad's three years ago. This is so cool that I'm meeting him again…

Wait, this is also the guy who is Rose's ex-lover. Damn. I heard the sound of footsteps behind me and looked and saw Christian, the other moroi and the baby. I backed up thinking I could at least get past the moroi but they were stiff as bricks and glared down at me. I'm pretty sure that kid was glaring to.

I looked back and forth between them and the sandwich they created.

"Shit." I said under my breath.


	9. Chapter 9

**Britt's P.O.V **

I was happy that I found Rose's lost lover, yet wasn't so thrilled to know that him and his hooligan friends were holding me hostage. I was currently in their living room. It had white walls lined with pictures of the queen, Christian and their baby. A large chandelier hangs in the middle of the room. It looked as if it had diamonds and crystals hanging from it. The couch was made of fine white leather and because of my dirty clothes I felt weird sitting on it. Another couch was in front of me that a girl was sitting on; she wasn't looking at me she was only texting on her phone. The baby was napping next to her. In the corner the three men were discussing something; occasionally their eyes will look my way.

I wanted to run yet I know the dhampir girl on the couch will catch me in a matter of seconds. Plus I was still worn out by today's events. I looked out the tinted windows; I couldn't see much except shapes. Their flat was at the top of the royal palace. I played with my fingers over and over again, maybe that will calm my excited nerves. It did nothing.

"Okay Britt, this can and hopefully will be easy. All you need to do is answer these questions truthfully and then you can leave." Dimitri said. I nodded.

"Where were you today, around nine, when the sun set." Shit, did they find out about me and Rose? Hell yeah.

I blurted the first thing that came to my mind. "I plead the fifth." I said. "On terms that I might incriminate myself." Of course I knew I wasn't in a court room but still. They raised their eyebrows.

"Just answer the question." Christian said frustrated running his fingers through his hair.

"No." I quickly snapped back.

"Look Britt, we could either waste precious time arguing or you could simply answer the question." Adrian, I think, said.

"I don't mind I have all day." More like five minutes. I should be getting to Rose soon.

"Fine, you wanna do this the hard way; we'll do this the hard way." Adrian said. His green eyes met mine.

"Britt, tell us what you were doing at the graveyard today."

"Wait how do you know I was at the grave-" I couldn't finish. His eyes…

Yes, I should tell him what I was doing at the graveyard that makes perfect sense.

"I was visiting my granddad." Adrian seemed frustrated for a moment before focusing again.

"What else where you doing, did you see anyone there?" He asks.

"I saw her…" I said I was resisting whatever it was. I couldn't rat Rose out. Yet that makes perfect sense, they should know.

"I saw R-" Before I could say her name a ball flew in from the window, making shards fly everywhere. Christian quickly went to get his baby and shield him from it. Dimitri and the dhampir girl quickly got the moroi out of the way even me. But I needed to get out of here before they did whatever they were doing again and make me spill the beans. I looked at the object that flew from the window and it was like a bomb of some sort. It was quickly spilling white cloudily fumes that smelt like a mix of pumpkins and window glass cleaner. The smoke wasn't that heavy and I could see my way through it but I began to feel dizzier.

The door slammed next to me, I then realized I was leaning on the wall for support. Someone knocked the door off its hedges. Fear pulsed through me but once I saw who came through I wasn't.

"Rose." I whispered as I coughed again. Rose was dressed in all clothes and a black hoodie. The hood was pulled up so I could barely see her face.

"Why did you throw the bomb?" I ask trying to suppress another cough.

"What bomb?" She asks and then looks back and her mouth forms a 'o'. "I didn't throw that. I was just saving your ass, I wasn't causing a distraction."

"Whatever, let's just leave." I said but before we could several more people come in. All dressed in black like Rose. They didn't look at us, they charged out throughout the apartment.

"Where's the Queen?" One yelled. Dimitri came a start fighting one of them. But they were using magic against him.

Magic? Shit, are these people moroi? That'll be a big duh. The other dhampir girl also tried to tackle and both were successful but still had more to fight, then Her majesty walked in. She looked at the scene before her. Her house a mess, smoke everywhere. Things broken, two guardians dodging fire balls and her husband in the corner trying to sooth the crying baby. Also me who's leaving mud everywhere.

I knew we needed to get out of here before more guardians showed up.

"Come on, it's a perfect opportunity let's bail." I said tugging on Rose's hoodie.

"No, their trying to attack Lissa." She said. I gave her a 'what the fuck' look.

"Go, go to my house. The key's on top of the threshold. I can handle this." I was about to argue to stay but then a hay wire fireball flew my way and ran out without a second thought.

**AN – I wish I got more reviews for the last chapter *Sigh* maybe we can manage some more for this one ;) **


	10. Chapter 10

**Rose's P.O.V**

After around two hours I started to get anxious. My faith in seeing Dimitri again was almost non-existent. He could be guarding some Russian lord, or maybe he's hanging out with his family. Or he's somewhere in Taiwan with Tasha. Maybe not Taiwan but still.

Damn, maybe he did find another woman on his shoulder. He is _really _was good looking, it's only been three years. I bit my lip and played with my fingers on the cold hard floor of my apartment.

"Why did I send Britt?" I asked no one in particular. "I should be doing it myself." I said then I realized it was true. I should be doing it myself. Yet, can I see my old boyfriend looking like I do? I looked down at my arms, they pale/grey skin was hideous I looked like a zombie – a corpse. I was terribly skinny and pretty much looked like a walking corpse. Am I? I put my hand over where my heart supposed to be. The most joyous thud was under my finger tips. I almost wanted to cry, it was just that amazing.

I smiled as the beat continued, and continued and continued. Hopefully not stopping for a very long time. I took my hand away but I could almost still feel the beating on my fingers. After a few more minutes I got impatient again. I looked at the bag that held the money in it. I took it and left the apartment, keeping one key in my pocket while the other I put on top of the threshold. I walked out, hopefully not attracting to much attention. Sadly a walking zombie gets a few looks.

Once I was out, I went to Rue 21. I bought a few tee shirts, long sleeves shirts. Hoodies, jeans – lots of jeans. No skirts or anything. I bought some underwear and bra's and grabbed some shoes. After I went to McDonalds and got a sandwich wrap and walked to my apartment in higher spirits. I got a glance at the clock when at McDonalds and I can see another hour passed and Britt still wasn't here. Damn her for making me worry. I looked at my bags and pulled out black jeans and pulled the black shirt hoodie over my other shirt. I put on my shoes and some sunglasses and went out again, this time managing to not attract so much attention.

It seemed like I'll have to walk to court, yet I didn't have the time so I caught a cab but he only took me half way since the court is surrounded by woods. I gave him the money and ran the rest of the way to the court. I was so out of practice, plus I believe I'm lost.

I looked around and all I saw was trees. Plus it was night. My dhampir senses can only go so far. I sucked it up and kept running trying to see anything familiar. Yet I never walked to court before. The first and only time I've been here was through Airplane. I don't even think I know what the front gates look like.

Damn it! I leaned against a tree to catch my breath. I don't know how long I was out here, but it felt like forever. It was almost as if I was running in a damn circle because I kept seeing the same things over and over again. But most trees look the same. A snapping of a branch caught my attention. I turned around to see someone moving. If it's Strigoi I'm screwed. I didn't feel nausea though; even though the bond with Lissa is gone I should still have my shadow-kissed powers. Those were created because I died and came back, not because of Lissa.

"Okay, court is right up that small hill." Someone said. "I believe we should make it." That person said again. I quickly hid behind a tree as I tried to get a good view of them. There was about five and all of them were looking down at a map while one had a flash light over it.

"We meet the others at the palace." Another said.

"Okay, let's do this!" Another one said enthusiastically and I could tell that this one was a girl, the others male. They then started walking and I followed them at a safe distance a few minutes passed and we then was at the court's gates. Not the front gates but more of the wall that blocked the court from the prying eyes of humans. They moved a bush away and reveled a small little opening that you can squeeze through, after they were all in I waited for a few seconds before I moved in.

It was night so the court was busy. The moroi was to busy to look at me though plus even if they wanted to they couldn't get a good look at my face. I looked through the crowd to see the group moving towards the palace. I quickly followed them but tried not to look to obvious. If Britt was anywhere she might be at the palace.

Like they said they met up with more suspicious characters near the palace. I ducked behind a corner to listen to what they're saying.

"I'll sling this in the palace window of the Queen's chambers. Then you guys go in and try to get her. Group two will stay out here in case she manages to escape, everyone clear?" Everyone nodded. My eyes widened.

They're trying to hurt Lissa. I might not be a guardian, or even a novice but I still had the need to protect Lissa. I went in at the back and managed to dodge some guardians. The group was still talking outside and didn't even notice me. I mostly dodged guardians and moroi since I know I'll get hassled if anyone saw me. I took an elevator up to the queen's floor. Once I got there I saw that no one was there. Where are her guardians? 

They must be in their rooms I guess. The Queen's floor was set up so the guardian's rooms were all near Lissa's. The wooden double door at the end of the hall must be Lissa's little flat. I heard the elevator ding again so I moved to another hallway and peaked my head out to see the shady group position near Lissa's room. I heard a loud crash from somewhere inside that room. Everyone in that group nodded to each other but before they could get in I ran towards them and started fighting. They were surprised but stared fighting back. It surprised me when I found out that they were moroi. But I didn't let it distract me.

I was already really weak but I managed to get all of them down for the time being. I quickly knocked down the door to see smoke all around.

"Rose." Someone whispered. My eyes widened as I looked at the source but I saw Britt, thank god it was her.

"Why did you throw the bomb?" She asked.

"What bomb?" Confused I look around and in the middle of the living room is a little bomb that seemed to be sprouting the smoke in the room. Oh, that bomb. "I didn't throw that. I was just saving your ass, I wasn't causing a distraction." I said. But it was a mild lie, I kind of was saving Lissa's ass and I also momentarily forgot Britt's. Oh well.

"Whatever, let's just leave." Britt said, she barely was able to finish the sentence before those goons outside came in. With some new friends. Luckily they didn't pay attention to me they just was looking for Lissa. Which is way worse. And if by cue Lissa came in.

"Come on, it's a perfect opportunity let's bail." Britt said tugging on my hoodie yet I wasn't paying attention to her.

"No, their trying to attack Lissa." I argued but I'm pretty sure Britt didn't care. God, she's relentless I minus well get rid of her now.

"Go, go to my house. The key's on top of the threshold. I can handle this." I say in a commanding voice yet she still looked like she might argue, then a haywire fireball came at her and she was out in seconds. Good for that.

One of the attackers managed to get away from the other guardians in the room and tried to go over to Lissa. My fist flew out to his face before he made contact. I still tried to hide me face from Lissa who was frozen with fear. Lissa was backed against a wall while I fought more attackers that came towards her. More people piled in trying to attack the queen and some of the royal guards came to yet there was so many. I tried my best to protect Lissa, yet I was fumbling and weak. Luckily I was against not very well trained moroi. If it was guardians, or even a regular dhampir I would be screwed.

I kicked one in the leg, incapacitating him for a few seconds before I punched him in the face, knocking him out. I went over to my next target to realize it was a guardian who thought I was a threat. This is my cue to leave. I turned but he end up punching me in the shoulder making me trip and almost fall over, and knocking my glasses off.

"Shit." I muttered I looked up and saw everyone fighting still yet my eyes saw _him. _

Dimitri.

As if sensing me he turned to look my way but before he could get a good view I was running out the door.

**A/N – Thanks for all the reviews the last chapter. They really made my day; I wanted to write this chapter sooner yet I was so busy. It's a new semester and I NEED to do better this one or I'm not getting my Nook or that shopping spree I asked for a month ago. So I hoped you enjoyed this chapter and review! **


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N – I love you're guy's reviews! It really helps me out, by the way Do'B I really like you're idea and I'm gonna use, so THANKS!**

**Dimitri's P.O.V**

Those eyes…

I tossed and turned in my bed all night, my eyes peering through the darkness of my room. If I close my eyes, even for a moment I'll see them. I fluffed my pillow for the thousandth's time as I turn again. Sleep never comes to me that might (day for humans) when time comes for me to wake up I walk in Viktoria's room where she was sprawled across the bed.

Viktoria is very busy and used almost every second of her day, and some nights, doing either guardian duties or something to help her college duties even though she's on break at the moment. I smiled before I slightly nudged her and she sprang out of bed.

"Who's there?" She asked her hair disheveled and some old make-up left on her face.

"It's simply me, Vicka." I said to her, she moves some hair out of her face to see me. She then collapses back in the bed.

"Wake me at 10." She said into her pillow. I nudged her again yet she swatted my hand away. Obviously she wasn't going to wake up like this.

"Okay then Viktoria, to bad you'll have to wait till you wake up to get the mail to find out your charge." Viktoria then shot up and moved more hair out of her face.

"Shit." She muttered under her breath. I scowled at Vicka, I hated it when my baby sister curse she was still my little baby sister to me, even though in reality she's a grown woman. Secondly, Rose used to curse – a lot! It's the little things that remind me of her, like when someone uses sarcasm or when someone curses. It's sickening and those things make me madder and madder each day. One day I'm just gonna lose it, I know it. These therapy sessions might just help me to – to finally move on.

Do I want to move on?

I was getting dressed after my shower when my phone rang. I put on my shirt before going to the nightstand to retrieve it. I answered it before I even looked at the caller I.D.

"Belikov." I answered swiftly.

"Get over to our house now, Lissa has some important information to tell us, plus we got therapy in about two hours." Christian's voice said on the phone.

"I'll be there." I said before closing the phone shut and stuffing it into my pocket. I got my jacket, not my duster. It just reminds me of Rose. She always criticized it and made fun of it. Yet the best memory was when she was prancing around my room in it – naked. That was about a couple of weeks before her death.

I could still remember how she looked, how her skin felt beneath mine. I shook the memories away and walked out of my room into Viktoria's again who was sitting on her bed fully dressed eating cereal.

"We need to be at the queen's right now." I told her as I picked up our room keys and stuffed them into my pocket along with my car keys. Viktoria got up and set her unfinished bowl of cereal on the night stand and we both walked out but we stopped by the postal office for a number of reasons.

One, Viktoria's package for her temporary charge should be in there,

Two, it's good to prepare myself for Lissa's house, every time I go there or simply see or hear about her I imagine Rose will just walk out of no where and be glued to her hip like the two of them once were.

Three, It's good to take the long way, that way we can scout for Britt.

I pulled the car to the curb of the Postal Office and Viktoria all but ran out and I stayed in the car. I looked around at the place, looking at faces. I wanted to find Britt. She's so reckless and irresponsible, careless like the regular teenage sense.

She reminds me so much of Rose…

Yet Rose would have admitted to what she did and took punishment, not gracefully yet she would have taken it. I found myself gripping to the steering wheel angrily and the cold air that rushed beside me made me look and see Viktoria gripping on a big yellow envelope. She took her seat and I started driving, she didn't open it she just looked at it. And looked at it, and looked and looked.

Once we were outside of the palace I parked the car and turned to her.

"Aren't you gonna open it?" I asked her. She shrugged and lay the envelop on the floor and slid it under the seat.

"No, I'm not ready yet." She said. "When we come back I'll open it, it'll decrease the chance of a meltdown." I smiled and we both got out of the car and into the palace. Moroi, like usual were buzzing around with phones stuck to their ears and papers in their arms. The ones who weren't were the royals who simply sat around and drank red wine, or so I thought.

We went up the Queen's floor and no surprise we saw tons of guardians lining the halls. No surprise there, yet another attack was placed on the queen, this one was sloppy to. Almost like they were desperate. They nodded to us and we made our way down to Lissa's room, we simply opened it and saw that Christian, Adrian and of course Lissa was already there sitting at the dining table. Christian and Adrian were quiet and Lissa was looking at a picture and tears were fighting in her eyes.

"What's going on?" Viktoria asked taking a seat and me sitting next to her.

"Lissa just told us some important news." Adrian said leaning back in his chair. We then turned to Lissa.

"I'm pregnant." She said. I was happy for Lissa yet at the same time it wasn't exactly the best time to bring a baby into this world since a target was on Lissa's life, not to mention all the stress she's going through now, that can't be healthy.

"Now before you all worry, I'll be fine. It's just we need more kids anyways but this will be tough and I hope you guys support me." We all nodded. Even though Lissa wasn't my charge anymore she was still the queen and the only link I have left with my Roza.

"Is that an ultrasound?" Viktoria asked pointing towards the picture in Lissa's hands. Lissa shock her head.

"No, it's for our therapy appointment, even though Dr. Patterson's daughter is currently a wanted fugitive and M.I.A we're still going to go on with them – for now at least. She told me to bring a picture of Rose for something she plans on doing." Lissa handed the picture to Viktoria and Viktoria liked at it for a few seconds before passing it back – I didn't get a glimpse of the picture.

"She's really pretty." Viktoria commented.

"Was, yeah she was pretty." Lissa said looking at the photo again.

"So is that all you wanted to tell us?" I asked her. She shook her head.

"No, it isn't. Yesterday I was in a meeting with a girl who went through almost the exact situation as me and Rose." She took a minute to calm down before continuing. "She believes something else went on with Rose's death, more that meets the eye."

"Like what?" I asked.

"I don't know I was called here before we could get into to much discussion. I'm planning on meeting her again after our therapy session." Lissa said before looking down at the photo again.

"Ever wonder what was going through her mind at the time?" Christian asks after a while of silence. No one needed to elaborate on the question we all know who 'she' is. No – was. No one answers so say something.

"She was lonely," I said. They all nodded.

"She probably felt abandoned to. I'd rather go dress shopping than help her." Lissa admits. "I didn't even like the prom; it was the gloomiest of all proms in history."

"Plus your make-up kept smearing due to crying so much." Adrian said.

"Yeah, my picture looked like hell." Lissa said. "But that's what I felt like – hell, a torment that never ended and still haven't." Lissa picks up the picture and gives it to me.

"You're probably the worse of us all, you should keep the photo. I got a couple more." I look down at the photo and see Rose with her hands shoved in her pockets of her favorite jeans. She's wearing a grey hoodie that's pulled up over her head and it matches the cloudy sky behind her. Her famous smirk is on her glossed lips and some of her dark almost black hair is spilled out of the hood. Then there are her eyes…

Wait – those eyes? I think back to the bizarre attack on Lissa and think of when I met those eyes.

No – it can't be!

"I got it!" Lissa said cutting me off my thoughts.

"Dr. Patterson says we all should face our problems right? Well I think instead of guessing what Rose was thinking, we might ask her ourselves." Lissa said with a triumphant smile.

"We can't bring her back from the dead, Lissa." Adrian says lamely.

"No, we can't but we can always have a séance."

**A/N – Like, hate? Review! I probably won't be updating till next week or maybe mid this week, who knows really. P.S anyone ever done a séance since I have zero knowledge how that works…do you like light candles and dance in a circle while chanting? I think I'll have to pull out the big guns for the next chap. Yes, that means I'll have to BING-search! Google-search sucks. **


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N – Finally the next chapter. I'll like to thank ****MeritSullivan** **for giving me the freaky information I need. **

**Disclaimer – I haven't did this in a while, or ever in this story. Sorry Richelle! P.S she owns everything! Sadly…I don't even own the Russian. **

**Lissa's P.O.V**

"I found the freak!" Christian said busting through the door. As the door closes I could see the tripled number of guardians outside the suite. Christian scowls at Adrian since technically he does have his hands all over me. Christian didn't complain though, he knew it was best for me and the baby.

Earlier today they attacked again. It was the same as the others, dressed in blacked, all moroi and even using offensive magic – AGIANST THE QUEEN. Yet when it's Strigoi they're hiding behind guardians. This time it did a little more than a few scratches.

They cornered me in a less popular part of court, where maids and non-royals live. It was day as well. All twenty of my guardians were there; it was thirty of the rebels. Now I have sixty guardians, which is a bit much. Everywhere I go it's a crowd following me. It's also pissing me off that I'm taking these guardians from someone, or something else. Every attack I get more guardians from all around the world, I'm taking them from academies, non-royals, moroi resorts and from around the court. I'm leaving more people defenseless because of me. I wanted all of them to leave so I can have my original guardians back.

_My original guardians are Dimitri and Rose. _

That also confused me, even though I'm getting a truck load of more guardians, none of them are Dimitri, I can understand not getting Rose back but Dimitri? He was my one of my original guardians – why can't he be one of my new ones?

Dimitri, from what I found out from him is guarding a Russian moroi lord. He was here only because of Viktoria getting her new charge, who is Jesse Zeklos. To say Dimitri was furious was an understatement but he didn't acknowledge it to Jesse or even to Viktoria yet I saw the blazing fury in his aura. Dimitri left around two months ago and he came back this week because I summoned some lords and ladies to a meeting. Dimitri's charge isn't really important – just another Ivashkov but I wanted Dimitri here.

"Thanks Adrian." I said as he got off of the floor, his eyes weary. I rest my head on the arm rest of the couch and instantly clutch to my stomach in protection.

I can already tell this baby is a fighter; it survived my encounters with the rebels and is still kicking it. Well not really since its legs haven't developed yet but still. I look over at Christian who was at the door with a strange looking moroi woman. She was a middle aged from what I could tell. She had wavy light brown hair that went just above her shoulders and grey eyes that was narrowed at Christian. She was wearing a long purple skirt that went above her feet, which were bare. She also had a loose red and purple top and had way too many beaded necklaces around her skinny neck and large rings, yet no wedding rings were around her fingers.

"This is Madeline our freak, " Christian introduced.

"Madame Madeline, I'll be your medium." Madeline corrects. "I'm going to be the medium for your séance." Shock and excitement drove through me. Shock because I was shot down when I mentioned having a séance. Plus the idea faded since Dimitri left and Viktoria is never around because she is Jesse's guardian and is half way around court with him. Also the attacks on me got me thinking about other things than a séance. Rose's body was still missing, along with Britt, after the interrogation, nobody seen her for these two months. She hasn't stepped foot on court and her mother is always worried that something happened to her.

Adrian tries to get her in his spirit dreams yet he can never get her. It was almost as if she was avoiding him, yet no one knows about Adrian's spirit dreams – so how could she avoid him if she doesn't know about him? This got me really paranoid lately; I always thought someone was watching us. The windows are always down, I'm only around people I know and trust like Christian, Adrian and Viktoria whenever she's around. I don't know her well yet Dimitri trusts her, so I do to.

I only have Mia watch Andre now, no more professional nannies. When she's not watching him I have him with me, always. I can't take my eyes off him, if something happened to him because of this I'll never forgive myself. Talking about Andre maybe I should check on him, it's been ten whole minutes since I last seen him.

"Are we doing the séance now?" Adrian asked. "With just the three of us?"

"Yeah, I planned on calling Dimitri and Viktoria. Plus we should do it now; Dimitri will be leaving again in a few days." Christian explains while pulling out his phone. I get up from the couch and go upstairs to check on Andre.

His nursery is just across the hall from me and Christian's room. His walls were light blue with glow in the dark moons and stars on the ceiling. His crib was white with blue bedding and he laid in the middle, hugging the orange bear the clashes with the room yet he adores the tattered old thing. I lean over the crib and watch as his small chest go up and down. I gently trail my fingers down his cheek, to his little fingers.

He's fine. Perfectly fine.

I breathe out the breath I've been holding. I wrap my arms around myself; it's a little chilly in his room.

Wait, why should it be chilly? Panicked I looked over the window, which is cracked open the slightest. I run over to it and close it, more like slam it shut and put the locks on it and shove the curtains over the window.

I look back over to Andre's sleeping form. He sure is a deep sleeper. I look back at the window and peak out the curtains to see a figure retreating into the shadows.

I shut the curtains again and pick up Andre's basinet and get his blanket and put it in there and lastly I grab him gently and put him inside. I try to keep my hands from shaking. I put his bear with him and take him outside his room and back to the living room.

"I called Dimitri and Viktoria; they'll be here in five." Christian explains. "Hey, what is Andre doing here? Isn't he supposed to be taking a nap?" I put Andre near the coffee table and look over at Christian.

"Yeah but his window was open, did you open it?" I asked him. He shakes his head. I look over at Adrian.

"Did you?" I ask. He shakes his head.

"Nope, I don't go anywhere near that kid. Your baby doesn't like me." True. My worry increases, I fiddle with my fingers, a habit I picked up when ever I got nervous. The door bell rang which made me jump.

"Calm down, it's just Dimitri and Viktoria." Adrian said and answers the door. Dimitri and Viktoria are there and they walk in.

"Hey guys haven't seen you in a while." Viktoria said. "Didn't think our reunion will be a séance."

"Viktoria, your part of our pack now, don't you know we do the oddest things at the strangest times?" Adrian said smiling lazily. Viktoria just laughed.

"Yeah, I guess so."

"So shall we get started?" Madame Madeline said. Everyone nods. Dimitri moves the coffee table away and Christian gets pillows for us to sit on. Andre will be between me and Christian. Madame M starts by getting us comfortable, like offering drinks and anything that'll help us. She turns down the thermostat to a room comfortable temperature.

Madame M comes to the head of the circle.

"Does anyone need to use the bathroom or go out for smoke or something?" She asked and everyone looked at Adrian. We all know he has a small bladder and a smoking habit.

"I'll be right back, I need to pee." Adrian said and goes to the bathroom.

"Don't you smoke in our bathroom!" I yell to him as he goes up the stairs.

"Yeah, yeah." I hear Adrian say back. I roll my eyes.

"Okay, well everyone turn off your cell phone or any device that will interrupt us during the séance." She instructs. I pull out my cell phone and set it to silent and everyone else does to. Since Adrian left his phone near his pillow I do it for him. Adrian then comes back with the hint of clover cigarettes on him. I scowl at him.

"Everyone now should be relaxed, try clearing your mind and breathing evenly." Everyone does so, yet it's a bit hard since everyone is so pumped. This will be the first time in three years that we talk to Rose. Even if she's dead. I calm down by simply thinking of tree's swaying in the wind, I'm not sure what got everyone else down.

"Everyone calm good. Now let's begin." This got me a little more nervous again. We kept a little lamp on in the corner to give us some visual but now, even if the sun was shining above us – it wouldn't make this any less scary. Madame M then sat down on her pillow and crossed her legs. She then breathed in deeply and let go.

"You all may choice if you wish to hold hands or not, this séance should be fairly quick since most of you all had close relations to Rose." She explains. "It should be easy to raise her spirit, if she's fine that is. If she still holds anger and resentment, this séance could take a turn for the worse." I could see fear flash in everyone's eyes – except Dimitri's. Yet no one backed out. There was no turning back.

Madame M took our silence as a way to go on. We opted not to hold hands. Then I felt the air shift, it had nothing to do with spirits, it was just our nervousness.

"Rosemarie, we kindly ask if you're come from the land of the dead and grace us with your presence." Madame M said with a calm but firm voice. For a while nothing happened. It was actually quite some time – around seven minutes. The apartment was silent, you can only hear our steady breathing and a little of Andre's snores.

"Rosemarie, come to us." She said again, her eyes closed and her wrinkles scrunched up in concentration. A few more moments pass, I'm almost tempted to yawn.

"Please let the spirits be released into our mist." She said, this time in a desperate tone. This grew uneasy for me, for some reason I couldn't put my finger on it. Yet Dimitri could.

"Wait, you said spirits. You didn't specify that you're looking for Rose." Dimitri said. She simply laughs at his observations.

"I said her name in the past two callings. I believe she gets the picture." She said chuckling again.

"What if they don't, what if an evil spirit comes?" Adrian asked, by looking at his aura I could tell he was beyond bored and was actually kind of hoping something unexpected to happen – like evil spirits. I looked over at Dimitri's aura. He was bored but alert, waiting for anything to happen. Everyone else was pretty much the same expect Madame M, who was more frustrated than she put on.

And me – well I was bored out of my mind, and I've been sitting in this position so long that my butt started to go numb. I looked over at Andre, who was still asleep and content in his basinet.

"I doubt anything of that nature will happen Adrian, the worse would be if nothing happens at all." Right when the words left her mouth the lamp we had in the corner turned off. Not exploding, or even flickering – it simply turned off. I could even hear the click on the knob when it turned off. So it was pitch black in the room.

I quickly grabbed Andre's basinet and put it on my lap and held it close to me. Christian quickly put a protective arm around me and Andre and by my heightened vision I could make out Viktoria's figure clinging to Dimitri.

"What the hell was that?" Viktoria asked a little shaken up.

"The light turned out." Adrian said in a deadpan voice. I could practically hear Viktoria and everyone in the room rolling their eyes.

"No need to worry, it was just a power outage." Madame M says trying to calm everyone.

"We've never had a power outage since we lived here!" I argued.

"Maybe it was Rose." Adrian says. "Think she's pissed?" Truly I didn't know how to answer that question, even though it wasn't really directed at me. I don't think I could ever describe what Rose felt or feels the only word I'll use is sad. Do sad ghost turn off lights? 

"Pissed off ghost don't turn off lights – they break glass and cry." Christian answered.

"Whatever ghost –" Adrian was cut short by the light coming back on. Except it wasn't in the corner of the living room – it was in the middle of the circle. Madame M let out a little shriek and held her hand to her heart. I simply bit my lip to stop from screaming.

"Rose, is that you?" I asked in a very panicked and scared voice while I cradled my still asleep baby. Then I heard a response if you can call it that, I heard knocking going all around the room, as if someone was walking around the room knocking on the wall.

"Is that yes, or no?" Asked Adrian, looking around the room wide eyed. A loud knock was placed on the floor in the middle of the circle, making the lamp crash over. We all jumped and I held onto Andre's basinet even tighter. Madame M then made a strange sound almost like gargling.

"No need for revenge, you restless soul." Madame M said in a calm voice.

"Is it Rose?" I asked. Would Rose be considered a 'restless' soul?

"Rose is hiding in the shadows, she has not responded to me. The restless soul that haunts these walls are by the name of Natalie Dashkov." A eerie silence engulfs us, even the ghost was quiet, maybe just to annoy us and let it sink in. Then all at once we turned to Dimitri – she must be most pissed off at him right now.

Dimitri looked; well he didn't really look anything. He didn't look scared at all, his aura was the same. He must be the most elevated person I know. It didn't even faze him that a ghost was after him.

"I didn't know Natalie, so does this mean I can leave?" Adrian asked totally unaffected.

"And miss out on the action?" Viktoria asked with a smirk. She was the total opposite of Dimitri, he was anti-social and Viktoria was a full-out party girl. Their little banter stopped we heard the sound of glass breaking from the kitchen.

"If she starts crying that'll be beyond freaky." Viktoria said looking at Christian who just laughed.

"Oh my fucking god!" I said standing up, everyone looked up at me. I was still carrying Andre. "You guys thought that Natalie was such a small threat that you guys can laugh off her ghostly resentment?" I asked. Even though I was pretty much forced to be friends with her on Rose's behalf, I was still 'friends' with her and I was devastated when she was killed – no, she killed herself, yet it's still horrible. Plus, she killed Mr. Nagy.

"I'm not laughing, but from what I heard from you, Rose and the gossip girls at St. Vladimir's I know that she was a stick in the mud, being around her was like watching your grass grow." I scowled at him, just as I was about to defend Natalie, she already had that in place. A smashing came from behind us, I ran to the other side of the room jumping on the couch covering Andre to see my flat screen, wall mounted T.V smashed, large pieces from the T.V was barely hanging on.

"Damn her!" Christian said. "End this, Madame Madeline." A knocking on the door made us all jump.

"Your highness, is everything alright?" One of my guardians asked. Was it Hugh, Jerry or Caesar? I used to remember their names but once they started multiplying it was hard to keep up.

The sound of the chandelier crashing on the floor sent half my guardians into the room, making it look ten times smaller.

The circle was no broken with everyone getting to corners of the room, which was good considering a large chandelier almost crashed on them. Behind me I swear I could hear the sound of distance laughter.

How the hell could this be worse? 

Then Andre starts crying.

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	13. Chapter 13

**Rose's P.O.V**

I pulled my hoodie up, shadowing my face and only letting my hair out. The dark hoodie was zipped up and hugged to my body, showing off my regained curves and mid-section. Note to self – never let Britt loose with a credit card. Yet I admit she did buy me some pretty cool stuff. Like the black skinny jeans that went into my black fur trimmed boots that's okay for running, I wished she bought some sneakers instead but whatever. I pushed my sunglasses back on my nose and looked up at the palace.

At the tip of the tower was Lissa's home.

I believe that room is the nursery. It took several minutes to wrap my head around the fact that Sparky knocked up Lissa, and they created an actual living baby. It just proved that Lissa didn't need me in her life; she was a grown woman and can work things out just fine on her own.

Would be just appearing back in her life complicate things? It's been hanging over me like a dark cloud and I can't escape it. I sighed as I continued to look at the window.

I could see a shadow moving from inside and then a dark figure slightly cracked open the window. The person stuck his thumb out, some signal perhaps, and pushed the curtains back before disappearing into the shadows of the room. I looked around at the people that surrounded the palace, most looked like random moroi who were to busy to pay attention and their guardians who followed behind like shadows. A lanky moroi then walked out of the palace and went into the mini forest like nothing happen. My bet is he's the thumb guy. Since the palace holds conferences, hotel rooms, spas and everything else a moroi could dream of no one cared who came in and out.

Suddenly the peaceful surroundings of the court turned hectic as five SUV's sped down the roads of court and the moroi that were loitering around quickly moved out of the way, yet stayed near by to see what was happening. Same old moroi. The cars had the sign of the Dragon on it, which meant Lissa was in there. Of course she was.

Even I saw the attack; I don't want to admit I was watching her. Yet I was, and technically still am. I wished I could have jumped in with the guardians yet I wasn't strong enough yet. These months that I've been alive I've been gaining my strength, eating healthy – for the first time, doing laps without complaining, going down at the local gym and tanning in between. I almost got my old body, almost not yet though. But soon.

I saw some guardians come out of other cars and surrounding one of the cars, that Lissa most likely was in. I hid in the shadows as I watched them carry her out and into the palace. I looked up at the window then back at Britt who was behind me, smoking. She wore similar clothes that I did.

"Britt, you stay here and watch what happens, I'll be back in an hour." I told her, she nodded. I ran across the street, slipping in the shadows to avoid being seen.

I ran into the little wilderness. It wasn't really a forest; it was more like a park with lots of trees. Way to small for a forest. I hid behind a tree and peaked my head out to see if I could catch any figures around. It was night and it didn't help that I was wearing sunglasses; my vision is great because I'm a dhampir but not that great, plus the tree's casted shadows on everything which made it that much more impossible to find someone.

A branch snapping caught my attention; luckily it was in front of me and not behind. I crouched down to see if I could any feet. Yet all I saw was bushes, branches and more leaves. I heard the very faint sound of whispering around me.

My head quickly whipped around to see if I can catch any figures. All I did was hear them, not see them. The whispering then grew louder, and louder till it was almost audible. I kept looking around yet it was to dark, only the moon light gave me some kind of visual.

"Who's it?" I heard a voice ask.

"Think they work for the queen?" Another asked. The warning bells then went off, yet before I could bolt, skinny arms wrapped around me trying to pull me yet I could tell these were Moroi arms. I elbowed the stranger in the stomach and heard him grunt yet after his grip loosened someone else grabbed me, again a moroi.

Maybe in the dark they can't tell I'm dhampir, plus my figure is still close to a moroi. Sadly.

This time I kicked him, stood up and turned around and punched whatever was in my way. I heard my knuckles crack and felt wood enter my fingers, apparently that something was a tree.

"Shit!" I cursed as I clutched my throbbing hand to my stomach. A faint glow and warmth came to my side. I quickly jumped to my side and leaned against tree for support because face it; I was way out of practice. I saw around ten moroi in the forest and in front of them a small fire ball, enough to see around them but not enough to get attention from people outside the forest.

They all dressed the same as me, all black clothes and mean scowls on their faces.

"A dhampir?" One girl asked. She took off her sunglasses to look at me. She of course was moroi and apparently didn't like dhampir's. The rest gave me similar looks, disgust, surprise.

"Take her." One guy said who looked to be the leader. I tried to run yet all I end up doing was crashing into more moroi. I'm in desperate need to work out more; I'm still not at my full strength.

And I'm gonna be taken out by moroi.

That's the lowest of all lows.

I tried to fight, I kicked I punched yet I wasn't strong enough and eventually they hauled me away.

Three men hauled me deeper into the forest before blind folding my eyes and binding my wrist together. I could still hear the crickets chirping and the sound of grass crushing under my boots. I tried to keep track of my surroundings by listening to everything, even the hushed whispers of the crazies around me.

It almost felt like we were walking for miles then we finally got there.

"Put her over there." I heard the man that was in charge say. I felt myself be pushed down into a chair and immediately after my butt connected with it I felt someone wrap something around me. Someone pulled my hair trying to get the binding off. Once it left my eyes I quickly squinted if the change of light.

Several dim lit lights hung from the poorly maintained ceiling. Some of the tiles were broken or falling off, other parts of the ceiling were completely gone. The walls were pretty much the same, some chipped paint and missing dry board making big gaps in the walls. The floors weren't good either; there was hardly a floor to speak of. Tiles were here and there yet most of the floor was made up of dirt.

Putting that all together I'm guessing that this is an abandoned building that the conspirators put together.

"What's your name?" A moroi guy asked. He was pale, skinny and really tall making him look lanky. How the hell can he be the mastermind of all of this? He seemed perfectly normal, nothing threatening at all.

"What's your name?" He repeats, this time in a more aggravated manner. I flinch at his tone. He could easily get one of his friends to burn me into smithereens if they wanted, or he might be able to do it himself. Yet I couldn't show fear, I've been in worse situations and didn't. I'm not gonna cower down to some moroi.

"Marie." I said using the last half of my actual name. He glared at him, hoping to get some sort of reaction I'm guessing yet I didn't show any fear, or any emotion. I was picture perfect of being at ease.

"And what is a person of your stature doing here?" He asked in a much calmer voice.

"You answer that for me, you're the one who dragged me here." I said using my old schooled bravo to get me out of this situation. He smirked.

"I mean in the forest, were you looking for us?" He asked. I quickly glance at the others around him and see all of them wanting to know the answer. A girl in the corner happens to catch my eye and she's looking at me curiously, like she was thinking.

I know her…

I quickly looked away from her and shrug some of my hair to shield the side of my face yet I'm not sure I did well considering my hands were tied behind my back.

"No, I mean yes." I said to him. "I wanna join." I lie. Maybe saying I wanna join will get me off the hook. Or put me further on it.

"Really?" He asked with a giant smile on his face with his fangs showing but it was more devilish than an actual smile. He then stood directly in front of me and squatted down and put his hands on my knees so he was looking up at me. "And why do you think we'll let someone of your kind to join us?" Of course this guy was thinking dhampir's were second class citizens, most likely a royal prick. Yet you'll think royals can afford something better than this trash bin.

"I can fight, better than you guys." I said. He chuckled and got up and brushed off the dirt off his pants. 

"Really, you showed us in the forest." This got laughs from everyone in the room. I felt my cheeks burn with embarrassment. A dhampir getting their ass handed to by a moroi, damn that's hard. But I know these people won't tell unless it's to each other.

"I'm having an off day." I said to him coming up with the lame excuse.

"You're not a guardian are you? If you are we're all screwed." I force a smile at this even lamer since of humor. I shake my head. "Oh I see you're a blood whore, understandable with those good looks of yours." Most of the boys in the room nod while checking me out.

"We'll think of this Marie," He said with a smile before walking out of the room and several people followed. Some left others stayed and chatted while the girl in the corner eye's stayed on me. A few moments later I heard the sound of her footsteps coming over to me.

"Do I know you?" She asked. I pretend to think about it while looking at her then I shake my head.

"Nope, I've never seen you before in my life." Which was a dead lie. I remember the times when Mia tormented me. This was after she fell from the popular royals yet she still had a lot of followers. This girl was one of them; I think she was Mia's wing girl since I saw Mia talking to her more than the others. I just couldn't think of a name.

"Okay, then I'm Cat." She said. Even though it was somewhat of a friendly introduction her tone implied something else. I can't forget that this girl and her friends want Lissa dead. God and I thought Mia could carry a grudge.

"I'm Marie."

**A/N – This chapter is shorter than most but whatever. I would have updated sooner yet I'm searching the internet for a cure for my DSi problems. Mine lost its internet connection over night – how? I'll never know so I'm trying to get the internet back. I usually read the Fan Fic's over it since I like reading it on my DSi more than on my computer. Sigh… **

**Anyways, do you think any troubles are gonna come up with Cat? I have one question though, do any of you know the names of any of Mia's friends I'm not sure if they mentioned them or not so I made up Cat. **

**Next chapter should be up soon. I was gonna just have it added to this but I'm too lazy to write the rest out. Can you blame me, my teacher sprung a quiz on us and I didn't know ANY of the answers. Really hope it wasn't worth much… **

**I'm so over this long A/N. **

**Review! Review! **


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N – Only three reviews for the last chapter? Yet they were super encouraging so I'll let it slide… FOR NOW! **

**This chapter is dedicated to Nellyrose1994, Do'B and YelloBubbles! **

**Lissa's P.O.V**

Everyone finally got settled down, we tricked the guardians into thinking there was no threat, we stopped Christian's nervous breakdown with the T.V, I got Natalie to beat it and Andre is now sleeping soundly on the couch.

Sadly the damage was more than expected. With the chandelier laying hopelessly on the ground and shards of glass everywhere. Luckily only the living room was effected and none of the bedrooms upstairs or any rooms down here. Except for the kitchen.

"Should we call the maid service?" Christian asked while running his fingers through his hair.

"Sure, yet if they ask anything lie your asses off." Viktoria said while looking at the chandelier. "Maybe we can say a tornado came."

Adrian scoffed. "A tornado, that's a bit over the top. No one's gonna believe that." Adrian said, surprisingly being the voice of reason. "A tornado in the middle of summer, yeah right." And there goes the voice of reason.

"We need to figure out why Rose didn't respond to our calling." I said which surprised everyone. They were so focused on the damage of the house they forgot.

Except Dimitri. He was in the corner, looking around but in his eyes I could tell he wasn't actually paying attention to anything. His mind was somewhere else. Dimitri looked over at me when I said that and by looking at his aura and his eyes I could tell he's hiding something. I'll have to question him about that later.

"Maybe she wasn't in a talkative mood." Christian said, slumping on the couch, careful not to wake Andre. I shook my head.

"No, that's not it. It must be another reason." I said, and then a thought occurred to me. "We need to talk to Aurelia Tudor; she's the girl I spoke to about Rose's death." I was supposed to meet with her to finish our talk yet I got side tracked and forgot, maybe she didn't contact me because she didn't want to really talk about her bond mate's death. I quickly went to my cell phone and dialed Aurelia's number.

It rang for several seconds before going to voice mail.

"She's not answering." I said closing my phone and I sighed. "We should just go to her house."

"I thought you said she lived in Romania." Adrian pointed out.

"Well I hope she's still at court." I said and went to get my purse when I came back down everyone was still hanging around.

"Who wants to go to Aurelia?" I asked and looked around. No one answered. It was almost like everyone was pretending not to hear me.

Christian suddenly found the blank wall interesting, Adrian was whistling nonchalantly and Viktoria was picking at a loose thread on her shirt. I got my answer.

"Dimitri, can you escort me to Aurelia's?" I asked nicely. He looked around then nodded. I knew he would do it, plus we needed to talk and I couldn't wait. Sadly we won't be alone when this chat happens; we'll be accompanied by all my guardians.

We went through the crowded hallway, Dimitri stayed next to me at all times. In the elevator seven of my other guardians came in. I stayed in the middle of the sea of people. I didn't bother to mention I was slightly claustrophobic, I'll be ignored anyway. They'll just tell me 'it's for my safety'.

Once we reached the lobby the circle the guardians casted around me got tighter. Other guardians came through the second elevator and we had to wait till the rest came to actually move. Damn tight security. The two guardians in front of me had a small cap, just enough for me to see around. I could see Gabriella talking to the lobby lady.

"Gabriella." I call out to my advisor; she turns her head to look at me and smiles. I usher her over. My guardians recognize her as a safe friend and let her into the tiny circle.

"Do you know where Aurelia Tudor lives? Is she even still in Court, America?" I asked Gabriella.

"I believe she scheduled a plane back to Romania three weeks ago" Gabriella said. Luck wasn't on my side. "But I also think that she didn't board, so she should still be around." Gabriella said and pulled out her cell phone, which was like her tiny assistant that she was always on.

"She's staying at the crappy hotel at the back of court." Gabriella said.

"Take us to Semen's hotel." I told my guardians. "And I wanna walk, enjoy the moonlight." I said as all of us went out side, the crowd following me.

Semen's hotel was mostly used for non-royals who stayed at court so it wasn't as fancy as the place or Royal guest housing. Me and my guardians then left the palace. They all tensed up ready for an attack. Dimitri was a little far away, not really escorting me liked planned. I looked around at my guardians and the wall they created around me. I sighed and ducked out between the guardians in front of me.

"Your Majesty, you must no be so out in the open, you're vulnerable to attacks." One of my guardians said.

"I'm vulnerable everywhere, you can guard me without suffocating me." I said and walked over to Dimitri. My guardians can't leave me, yet I'm Queen and they must obey me. They lined behind me and some in front and on the side. I was still sort of boxed in but I had way more room.

"Dimitri you have something you wanna say?" I asked him. He shrugged.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Lissa." I smiled; he was using my regular name which I took as a good thing.

"Don't lie, Dimitri. I could compel you if you don't tell the truth." I said in a teasing voice, yet I was dead serious. He gave me a half smile which was a mixture between dreamy hot guy and shy cool guy.

I can see why Rose loved him.

He wasn't my type though; I go for the tough, skinny pale guys – like my Christian.

"Extreme measures?" He asked. I shrugged.

"Extreme measures for extreme thoughts. Now, no changing the subject, what's on your mind?" Then the cool exterior of Dimitri changed and his face hardened. A quick peek at his aura I could tell that he was grieving – no surprise yet there was also something else.

Hope and confusion.

I can see why he's confused, we all are. Yet why hope? What's to hope for?

We walked for a while longer before he talked.

"Ever had something so obvious that you miss it?" He asked me. I thought about it for a few moments.

"Well if I missed it, I wouldn't remember it." I told him. He nodded.

"I guess that'll be true," He said. "The things that happened with…everything. It points to somewhere – or should I say someone."

"Britt, that someone is Britt." I told him. He shook his head.

"Lately, I've been questioning Britt. She might not seem like it, but I believe she's just a regular teenage girl." My eyes widened I had to command my feet to moving and not stop to slap some sense into Dimitri.

"Dimitri, all evidence leads to Britt; she's the one who get kicks out of stealing dead bodies." I said bitterly feeling it towards Britt _and _Dimitri.

How dare he stand up for her? She took someone that we both valued and loved.

"We're not sure she did anything." He pointed out. "It may be suspicious, Lissa but remember you have no –"

"No proof!" I exclaimed knowing what he's gonna say. I could feel my cheeks heat up with anger. "Well Dimitri, if you think you know so much answer this. Who took Rose?" I asked with my arms crossed over my chest. I didn't realize we were already at the hotel and my guardians were waiting for me – including Gabriella.

"I don't think anyone took Rose." He said.

"Well do you think she just got up and walked away?" I asked tauntingly.

He gave me a pointed look and said "You don't want me to answer that." I sighed and looked back at the hotel. I really need to talk to Aurelia and this will have to wait.

"We'll finish this later." I told him before walking into the hotel. Even though it was for non-royals everything at court still had to be 'pretty'. This hotel was about as good as a three star hotel.

I looked over at the sleepy receptionist who was flipping through a magazine. Her eyes were bugged out when she saw that the empty lobby just obtained more people than it can handle. One of those people being the Queen – me.

"What room is Aurelia Tudor in?" I asked. It was a little rude of me but the conversation with Dimitri just pissed me off and I wasn't gonna bother playing nice. It took a few moments to regain her composure before looking at the guest list.

"Aurelia Tudor is no longer in the hotel and if she is, it's not reported." She said. I raised an eyebrow.

"What do you mean?"

"Well my boss, the man who owns the hotel, doesn't really come here to check on everything. And the few workers here really don't do anything so some people take that to their advantage and stay a few days for free. As long as boss man doesn't know about it and we don't have to do more work its okay with us." She explained. Even though this is a three star hotel, its still ran like a cheap motel.

"What room was she in then?" I asked her.

"104, right down the hall." She said and reached behind her and pulled out a key and placed it in my palm.

Some of my guardians walked ahead of me and some behind, Dimitri walked next to me with Gabriella on the side. As we went further down the hall a foul stench was in the air. I wrinkled my noise and several of the guardians made comments on how it smelt. I could tell some of my guardians were jokesters others were sticks in the mud. My original guardians were always joking around and playing pranks on each other. Even in this large crowd I couldn't pin point my guardians, they were mixed up faces in the crowd.

We reached 104 and it seemed to be the base of smell. My guardians all shared a look before taking the keys and opening the door. Five of them went in and I went behind them.

The room looked fine, everything was in order. It was clean and neat, with suitcases next to the door, as if someone was ready to leave. Then I went into the bedroom…

There laid Aurelia Tudor's bloody dead body.

**A/N – Come on guys, review, review, review! **


	15. Chapter 15

**Dimitri's P.O.V **

She acted like a guardian.

It's in our line of work; we must not show our emotions to much. If so we'll drive ourselves mad with rage and sadness. Guardians see death on a daily basis, whether it's a fellow guardians, a regular moroi, our charge and even a Strigoi we killed. Death is death.

If we showed every emotion we felt, then we would never stop crying and screaming.

She was surprisingly keeping it together, it might have been because of the people in the room or it was because her mind was too occupied to cry. I'm not spirit user, I can't tell her emotions by spiritual means, I can only tell by face expressions and she has none.

I looked away from her to Aurelia Tudor's body that was still in the bed.

Aurelia was in a sun dress, which was no bloody, stale blood that is. Aurelia's body had been in here for weeks. They say she died about a few days after her talk with the queen. She had on shoes and looked as if she was ready to leave. What stopped her?

Her suicide.

Yes, a suicide. The coroner's claim that this wasn't a murder and I can see their reasoning.

Aurelia's wrists were cut – with a butcher knife. Her thin wrists were so deeply cut that it almost reached the bone. Five cuts on each wrist very sloppy and some over crossing each other. That wasn't the only thing that contributed to her death, even though some say that's what took her out. Nothing is set in stone till an autopsy.

Aurelia's throat was also very much clogged – with large walnuts. They don't know how many is stuck in her throat but by simply looking at her they believe she crammed so many down her throat that it may have damaged the trachea, they believe this because blood was in her mouth along with two walnuts, three more that you can see in her throat.

Very gruesome and painful way to die. Yet this rings a bell.

Even though I didn't like looking into Roza's suicide, I looked at her coroner's report a day before her funereal. I didn't look at the pictures, only the papers.

Rose was taken out by suffocation, from hanging. Her wrist, much like Aurelia was cut, but not as deep. Coincidence?

I looked back over to Lissa to see her guardian mask firmly in place. The only was I could tell that she was even upset was the light brim of tears in her eyes. She must have sensed me looking at her because her head turned to me. She began to walk over to me, ten of her guardians following her, the others outside.

"It's almost identical to what happened with Rose." She whispered to me. "Except the hanging part." I nodded and looked back at Aurelia's body which was being moved into a body bag. Lissa and I (with her guardians) all left the room and hotel.

Once we got back to Lissa place, her guardians lined the walls of the hallway, like before and me and her went inside. Christian must have called the maid service because the chandelier and all of the glass pieces were gone and so was the T.V.

"What did Aurelia say?" Christian asked. Lissa didn't say anything just went on the couch and picked up her son and cradled him in her arms. Maybe it soothes her. Christian then turned to me.

"Aurelia's dead." I said bluntly. Viktoria gasped. "She committed suicide." Everyone fell silent. Adrian was the first to speak.

"How?" He asked not looking at me.

"Slit wrist and she choked on a few walnuts." I told him. He looked up at me and raised an eyebrow, trying to pry whether I was joking or not. When he didn't see any signs of playfulness his face fell grim.

"It's not coincidence she died similarly to how Rose did." Lissa said finally speaking. "We should investigate more into this." She got out her cell phone and dialed.

"Gabriella, I need you to give me the files of all the shadow-kissed who committed suicide." She took a deep breath. "Including Rosemarie Hathaway's."

**Rose's P.O.V**

"Fresh meat." He said while looking at me with a hungry gaze. "The boss will like her." A moroi said while patting my hair down with his dirty little fingers. He looked at the mastermind of this plan, but apparently this guy wasn't the 'boss'.

"She's a dhampir though; dhampir's are only good for getting killed and cheap sex." He said pushing my head back. I was also still in the chair so I could hit him back.

"She might be useful. Dhampir's aren't known for rebelling, she'll be perfect." The leader said who I learned whose name was Jeremy. "She can get close to the queen and kill her with one stroke." Jeremy said. If he thought I was killing Lissa then he's crazy.

Yet I could always use it to my advantage. I didn't really ever mention this to Britt yet it was always on my mind. I failed Lissa. Epic failure. I failed everyone and nothing I can really do will ever make up for what I've done. Sadly. Yet I can still protect her. When a guardian dies, his or her duty ends – well I guess I'll have to bend the rules.

Even in death, I'll still die for her.

That was an oxymoron if I've ever heard one.

"I hate the queen." I blurted to the two fools. They both looked down at me, with puzzled features.

"Really." Jeremy said drawing out the word. "I find that hard to believe seeing as she's all for equality." I shrug, causing minor pain in my wrist by the rope.

"I wanna be a guardian – nothing else, I wanna live in a world where all I do is protect. I don't want that to be compromised." I tell him, it had truth to it, I wanna be a guardian and protect yet Lissa isn't doing anything to stop the guardians from guarding. She's just giving a lot more options to dhampir's which is good with me.

They took the bait. "Good, you may have hope yet." Jeremy said he then called Cat. Like a faithful servant she came running in the door, his lap dog of course. "Untie Marie." Cat took a small knife out of her pocket and sawed through the rope. Instant relief came when my hands were finally free. I twisted them so I could get blood flow again and regain the feeling in my hands. I didn't get up from my chair.

"You're first assignment will be tomorrow, we need you to plant a bug in the Queen's bedroom." Jeremy explained.

"We planted one in the nursery yet it was defective." Cat further explained.

"In the nursery, why would you plant a bug in the nursery? So you can see how the Queen's use super awesome diaper techniques?" I joked yet met glares all around.

"It wasn't for visual, just for auto – we don't watch, we listen." Jeremy explained. "Yet you have a point Marie, putting a bug in a nursery, not our brightest plan."

"It's was Cameron's idea, we all know she isn't the sharpest in the bunch." Cat said with her arms crossed. "Plus she spilled all of her nail polish over the bug, making it defective."

"It doesn't matter; we just need all eyes and ears on the queen." Jeremy said and then he turned to me. "You'll be one of the scouters, all you do is watch and follow the queen – make sure not to be seen."

"Marie, you'll put the bug in the living room and bedroom tomorrow." Cat said. Cat also went on to explain to me what else I had to do.

All I kept thinking was that I was protecting Lissa.

For the first time in a long time.

**A/N – Super short I know, next will be longer yet I was stumped with this and I wanted to update soon. **

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	16. Chapter 16

**A/N - Ever wanted to know what Rose's funeral was like? Find out here… **

**Long chapter – took me days to write it, yet at the same time I did take unnecessary breaks during most of this… 3,211 (Not including the A.N) words all for you guys! Make me happy and review **

**Lissa's P.O.V **

Soon I had around twenty files of dead shadow kissed, moroi, dhampir's and one human. Most of the spirit users have checked into physiological units and other disappeared off radar and are spotted now and again.

There were files and photographs of the deceased. None of them detailed since most decided not to get an autopsy which is understandable considering that their death was pretty straight forward. Rose though was the exception, when Janine found out she didn't believe and claimed her daughter was murdered and demanded a autopsy, which proved that indeed the wounds were self inflicted and was deemed suicide. No surprise there.

The others knew this and didn't waste the extra money on autopsy so there was really nothing here that pointed anything out.

Everyone was in our bedroom, including Andre who was sleeping in the mount of pillows of me and Christian's bed. I sighed and looked at another file, the girl's name Natalie Wart, crazy last name, she was around twenty, and her bond mate was actually her grandfather who died several days before Natalie's suicide. Many claimed this is the reason of her suicide since she was very close to her grandfather, which is expected. Yet one of her friends claimed that she was exhibiting 'dark, twisted behavior'. Similar to Rose.

The pictures of Natalie W was also tucked inside. It mostly showed her sides, which were cut deeply with a rusty razor. If they found her sooner she still might have died from infection even from that. Moroi are immune to a lot of things yet we're not immortal. She hung herself off the roof of her apartment complex; they found her at sunrise hanging from the five story complex. Scared a lot of people seeing a young woman hanging from roof. Her hair was dark, almost black and she had the regular pale moroi skin. She kind of resembled Natalie Dashkov which was creepy for a number of reasons.

Everyone had a different file in their hands, scanning over the information. Yet one file hasn't even been touched – Rose's. It was sitting at the corner of my bed away from everything.

I put Natalie Wart's away and picked up Rose's. No one noticed, except Dimitri, almost like he had a connection to the file. He briefly looked up to see my hand grab it and my eyes met his.

My mind wondered to the brief dispute we had. How he was saying that he thought Britt was innocent, the girl is the opposite contrary of innocent. Yet he also was saying something else, hinting at it.

"_I don't think anyone took Rose."_ I remember him saying.

"_Well do you think she just got up and walked away?"_

"_You don't want me to answer that." _

What did he mean by that? I didn't have time to ask him then and too many people were in the room to ask him now. It'll just raise unwanted suspension and unneeded confusion. I peaked over back at him, he was near the window with Viktoria was looking at the file like it was fantasy novels she liked reading.

_To bad they won't have their happy ending. _

I looked back down at Rose's file. If she could, what would her happy ending be? Her survival? Or was her suicide Rose's happy ending, even if it was our worse nightmare? Isn't that why people commit suicide – because life in general is just too much, and they just want to end it all?

I wouldn't really know, I've been in some near death experiences, some caused by me yet I never really ever wanted suicide. Does anyone just sit down and say they want to kill themselves? How do you even decide that?

I wish this séance worked out so I could ask Rose that.

I opened her file and quickly grimaced and shutting it. I steadied my breathing and looked anywhere but her file before opening it again.

The thing that made me close it was because the first thing was pictures. None of her face yet close up on things I've never wanted to see. Things my imagination created for me.

My imagination was Wonderland compared to the real thing.

I looked at one of the pictures; it was her arm and thick lines, straight and narrow going across her arm in bloody lines. There were several photos along with some pictures of her neck, which had a thick mean looking red line across her dead pale skin. I bit back the tears and put the photos behind the papers.

There were several papers yet I only looked at the summary page.

_Rosemarie Hathaway was found by the dorm matron at 3:23 am at St. Vladimir's academy in the Novice dorms. She was strung up by a rope in the middle of her room and was unresponsive. _

_Her arms were slit was a razor, hitting veins and caused major blood loss. The weight of her and the rope crushed her neck, killing her seconds after hanging. _

_Due to a requested autopsy we found nothing out of the ordinary with her body except for a few old scars from battle and found in her stomach half digested sour crème potato chips and a bar of chocolate. _

Nothing unreasonable here, except for the fact that Rose should have ate better but sour crème chips and a bar of chocolate was like a piece of heaven to her.

Wait, how did she get food? I checked everyday and she had food, yet from the door matron she never left. I set the paper down and talked to no one in particular. "How did she get food? She never left." I said.

"Maybe she had a mini fridge." Christian said shuffling through more papers. I shook my head.

"No, she didn't I remember her complaining about it. She wanted one for her afternoon snacks." I said and smiled softly back at the memory.

"_You know at 12'o'clock, the sun is shining and everything seems perfect. Then your stomach starts growling and it ruins it." Rose said as we hung out in the lounge one day. I rolled my eyes and laughed a little. _

"_First off, you sleep at 12; it's too sunny to be out." I told her. She shrugged. _

"_I know, it's my equation to a midnight snack, I'm hungry around that hour." She said. "So I usually want my afternoon slash midnight snack and I need a mini fridge, I don't want to be eating soggy ice crème or warm drinks." _

"_What if it's tea?" I said mockingly. _

"_Yeah, as if. I don't drink tea – that's for the British." _

"Who gave her, her food?" Asked Viktoria.

"Does it matter, its food what's the point?" Adrian grumbled while nursing yet another paper cut. I shrugged.

"Every detail counts." I told them. "Every single detail."

"Maybe it was a friend or someone, maybe somebody you don't know about." Viktoria said. "That person might have showed up at the funeral."

I had several problems with Viktoria's theory, mainly because me and Rose never had secrets, the exception being Dimitri, yet that was reasonable since it could have got out of hand if someone knew about them. Yet someone Rose was hiding, that doesn't add up.

"Lots of people were at her funeral, the whole school really." I said. "We were popular but not that popular."

"You might be able to remember faces if you talk about it. Tell me everything about Roses funeral."

So I did…

_Several guardians were positioned on either side of me. Queens's orders. I stifled another sob as they opened the church doors for me. The distant smell of flowers and tears drifted out. _

_I stifled another sob as I looked around at the crowded pews of mourners, tissues stuffed to their faces and the cheap make-up smeared off and for the royals they wore waterproof make-up and fake tears. No of them cared, they were all fake and didn't even deserve to be here. _

_I looked around at faces, not many familiar and some were probably here just to be here. I kept observing it was to keep my mind off the darkness that was crawling over me and stopped me for looking ahead. Yet I could feel it, or her. _

_The body called to mine like a magnet and my only choice was to respond. I slowly lifted my head and looked ahead. _

_I stopped where I was causing my guardians to flinch. _

_The coffin was just like I designed it. I wanted this to be custom made since I wasn't giving Rose second rate. She deserved the best. The coffin was beautiful and surrounded by roses and some other flowers here and there. Next to it was a glowing picture of Rose; I took it when we were on the run. _

_My eyes drifted over back to the coffin again. I couldn't keep the tears in my eyes and I launched myself towards it, yet I was several feet away from it and the guardians knew this would happen. _

_Once the queen found out that Rose was dead she knew that I'll save her. Through instant messaging she had several guards on campus keep me away, and they even chained me to my wall for safety precautions. The queen knew that it'll drain magic from me and make me crazy, I was her protégée and she couldn't have her minion crazy. _

_If she only knew it was worse when she's not here…_

_The guardians quickly restrained me and took me to the first pew where Christian and a few of our friends were. They gently put me next to Christian where his arm immediately circled me. I buried my head into his chest, ruining his suit with my tears. He didn't say sweet nothings in my ear; he really didn't comfort me in any other way besides holding me. This with Christian was plenty enough. _

"_Sorry I'm late my dear mourners." I heard a drunken voice said. "Sorry I'm late little dhampir." I quickly turned to see Adrian swaying in place as he looked at the coffin with a sad expression and lifted the bottle of vodka to his lips before staggering over next to Christian and squeezed in between him and Mia. Mia looked at him with a disgusted expression that momentarily stopped the waterfall of tears before she began them again. _

_Father Andrew then got to the podium, a grim expression on his face. Before he got out the first sentence I wailed again – maybe if I keep crying I'll drown in my own tears and join Rose…_

_My cries echoed off the walls and I could feel all eyes on me. The distress Dragomir princess. _

"_Lissa, please stop." Christian said gently in my ear. Even though I was causing a spectacle I could see a few tears leak out of Christian's blue eyes as well. _

_Adrian then got up and walked over to the podium where Father Andrew was. "Incase you all don't know…" He started. I heard Christian mutter something under his breath about a 'drunk distressed idiot'. "When a spirit user – such as our beloved Princess, loses a bond mate – such as our little dhampir here, Rose." He was about to say something else yet his eyes wondered to the coffin and stayed there before he began to drag his feet the coffin. He simply gazed at it, before running his hand along the wood. He then walked around to the front. _

"_I just need to see you one more time…" He whispered yet with my enhanced hearing I heard him. My heart sped up and I ran towards him before he opened it yet my guardians quickly restrained me before I could get out of my seat, yet someone else got to Adrian first, he only lifted the coffin top about two inches before the person pushed him away making the coffin shut, causing a loud bang through out the church. _

"_You didn't want me near her when she was alive, I can still see your hatred when she's dead." Adrian spat at the person. I then got a good look at him – Dimitri. _

_After the attack Rose told me about her relationship with Dimitri. It was still new to me and confusing and I didn't get a good chance to digest it. _

_Dimitri gave Adrian a murderous glare. Adrian scoffed, to drunk to care about the guardian killing him_

_"You can kill me, Belikov. Yet Rose won't be happy." He said. "Nor will it bring her back to us." _

"_I COULD BRING HER BACK!" I screamed at him and my guardians. "I could…" I whispered and buried my head in my hands as more tears poured out. I felt Christian sooth me by rubbing my back. _

"_I could bring her back…" Adrian slurred. _

"_Yet you're drunk and can't do a damn thing!" Christian shouted and jumped up from his seat. _

"_Damn thing…" Adrian repeated before talking another sip. "It doesn't change the fact that I wanna see her." He turned to me. _

"_What 'bout you princess?" The question shocked me; first, Adrian called me 'princess' even though I was mourning already it still bugged me and the fact that I've never seen Rose's dead body. I wasn't allowed to, due to Adrian's begging and pleading to Tatiana was I even allowed to come to the funeral instead of watching a video recording. _

"_I wanna see…" I found myself saying, unable to stop the words. Dimitri looked over to me, pain in his brown eyes. I can tell he didn't wanna see his lover a dead corpse, I wouldn't wanna see Christian like that either… _

_I looked away, I couldn't even stand it! I might be too weak to grasp on to his aura right now yet I still feel the sadness and heartbreak seeping out of his bones onto me. _

_I roughly ran my fingers through my hair, grabbing it and yanking it to relieve the tension. _

"_Sorry to interrupt." Father Andrew said. "Yet none of you have control over this matter, Rose's mother, Janine, does." All eyes turned on Janine who was at the pew next to ours. Janine was dressed in black slacks and a black blazer. Her eyes were watery and she occasionally put a tissue to her eyes. A man was beside her, consoling her. He was a little older, gray streaks and he wore a black suit with a flashy tie._

_I crossed over to her and got on my knees and looked up at her. She must have been waddling in her own grief to pay much attention to everything around her. _

"_What do you want, Lissa?" I could barely hear her voice it drifted away with her tears. _

"_We want the permission to open the casket. To see Rose one last time –" _

"_NO!" A voice boomed next to her. The man that sat next to her said. He wrapped his arms around Janine and pulled her towards him. _

"_What the hell is your say in this?" I yelled getting up and glared at him. "You're not her mother, her father, her brother or anyone in this mess dammit! Plus I was asking Janine a question not you –"_

"_No, Lissa." Janine said peaking out of the man's shirt. "My decision stands with Abe, the casket will remain closed." I turned my glare on her. _

"_Dammit, Janine can't you just open it! I wanna apologize to her. The last time we talked, she pretty much said in so many words that I was a horrible friend! I chose dresses over my best friend." I then turned and looked at the casket. "And I can never say sorry, I can never be there for her and apologize about all the times I put something over her. I didn't know her as well as I thought I did. Hell, I didn't even know that she loved Dimitri." _

_A voice in my head said I shouldn't have said that, yet it was too late. I heard some sort of growl behind me and next thing I knew I was being pushed out of the way and landed on my side on the church floors. Janine walked over my body and towards Dimitri who was still at the coffin. _

"_You had relations with my seventeen year old daughter?" She screamed at him, she didn't give him a chance to answer because she started hitting him. The first few were hard hitting then they were more like slaps. She started to cry again and Abe got up – stepped over me - went to Janine getting her away from Dimitri and taking her to the back of the church. _

"_You really did it this time, Rosie." Christian said with a small smile and patted the coffin lovingly. I realized that Christian didn't know of Rose's relations with Dimitri and compared to Janine was taking it fairly well. That is if you call talking to a coffin 'well'. _

_I got up off the floor and went to my seat and Christian came back and so did Adrian. It remained clear that the coffin was staying closed. Dimitri was the last to leave, but he went back to where the guardians were. He should have been here with the mourners yet duty first, right? _

_Finally the ceremony started and the rest was uneventful. Till it was time to take her to the hearse which will fly her out to the cemetery near the court. Pallbearers got on either side of the casket and walked down the aisle and everyone else walked out. I walked behind the casket first and my guardians around me, Christian though held my hand as well walked outside to the hearse. This is our version of the burial since we actually wouldn't see the burial. _

_When we got outside the moon was clouded by rain clouds and it was drenching on us. Like the earth itself was crying over our lost. I glued myself to Christian and rested my head on his chest as everyone came out of the church. I saw Dimitri lean against the church as he looked as us from afar. _

_Rain drenched us; I didn't bother getting an umbrella. I let it mix in with my tears and ruin even my water proof make up. _

_They carefully slide the coffin into the back and closed it. _

_It felt as if my world was closing, and I realized that the scene in the church was only the beginning. I ripped myself from Christian's arms and ran past my unsuspecting guardians to the hearse and banged on the back windows. _

"_Don't leave!" I screamed as tears fell and lightening struck in the distance. "You promised you'll never leave me! You promised to protect me!" I cried, I felt someone pry me away. I kept clawing at the window. _

"_You promised…" I whispered as I succumbed to the strength against me. The hearse then left, me still struggling after it, yet strong arms kept me back. _

_I buried myself into their chest, and they soothed my hair down. _

"_Don't worry princess, we all make promises we can't keep." A Russian accent said to me._

**A/N – Of course Dimitri was talking to her, incase that wasn't clear… **

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	17. Chapter 17

**Disclaimer – I don't own Vampire Academy Series or anything else really, except for a bottle of Root bear and it's halfway gone… **

**Dimitri's P.O.V**

Her skin was flushed against mine. Her back arched as I laid gentle kisses down her neck to her chest, where he generous breast were. Her moans floats through the air and causes unspeakable pleasure and joy to me.

I take one of her peach peaked breast in my mouth and use my tongue to flicker on the harden peak. She grinds her hips against mine and continually moans. I let loose with a pop and go onto the other, her fingers moving through my hair as she pulls it towards her. Afterwards I bring her down and kiss her gently on the lips.

"I love you so much Roza." I say while I turn her over so were both laying down, me on top. She smiles up at me. Her hand that's in my hair and travels down to my chest, across my abs down to the dick where her hand tightens around it. I moan into her neck and she gives a light giggle.

"Like that, comrade?" She whispers in my ear. I moan when she gives me another squeeze while moving her smooth hand up and down my shaft. She slowly moves from under me, flips me over and gently kisses my chest down to the golden area. As much as I love Roza, this is her first time and I wanna cradle her – please her. I can come later. I pull her up and spin her around so I'm back on top. She pouts.

"Patience, Roza." I said in her ear. I trail my finger down her neck, to her breast where I twist the harden nipple, making her moan loudly, the sound echoing off the walls. Beautiful.

I gently spread her legs, positioning myself.

"You failed me Dimitri." She said. What, I haven't even entered her yet.

Suddenly the vision changes, I'm no longer hovered over my Roza, naked. I'm fully clothed and Roza was in my arms. My eyes widened when I took in her attire, which was the outfit Lissa picked out for her to be buried in.

Roza's skin was pale, and angry red lines were on her arms along with a mark on her neck. Yet she wasn't dead. Not really anyways.

Her arm was wrapped around my neck and her head resting on my shoulder, she wasn't looking at me through. She was looking at the horizon, her eyes watery.

"Why are you crying my love?" I asked her, she looks up at me.

"You don't love me enough." She said. "Don't love me enough to save me…"

"Will you cross the horizon, will you walk to the ends of the earth, will you die for me?" I nod and kiss her head.

"Of course I will I would do –"

"No you won't!" She screams, cutting me off and jumps out of my arms and glares at me. "That's why I'm dead!" Tears fall down her cheeks and slowly her skin gets paler, till it looks sickly. She grows skinnier and some of her hair falls out as she screams and pulls some out and drop it on the grass.

"You didn't save me!" She cries. I couldn't do anything yet stand there and watch. "You killed me." She says before some of her skin peels off. She scratches at it, pulling more off. She pulls more and more off till I see bone. She then starts peeling at her face, taking chunks away.

"Roza, don't." I said, finally regaining my voice. She walks back and falls into a pit. The vision clears and I see that it's not just a pit. But a grave. I run towards it and drop to my knees at the edge and looked over.

Rose is already in her grave, the bottom half covered yet the top I could see her top. She was still in the outfit yet all her skin was gone, leaving only a skeleton and a few patches of hair on her head.

I was shocked back to my room at court, yet still droopy. Maybe I'm still dreaming. When I turned my head I knew I was dreaming.

The sunlight from outside illuminated her profile. Her brown hair flowed down her back and over her shoulders, the sun hitting her hair and made it seem like it was sparkling. She turned to look at me and smiled showing off those pearly whites of hers.

"Hey comrade." She said softly. Her voice sounded just like it used to all those years ago. Beautiful and radiant. I open my mouth yet she presses her fingers to them. "Don't talk – I wouldn't be able to leave if I heard your voice." She carefully removed her finger and it was replaced with her lips, it was simply a soft kiss, not touching. After a few seconds she stops the kiss.

"You still look drop dead sexy, even with bed hair." She said. "Yet I would already know that due to waking up to your face a handful of times." She said and smiles softly at the memory. She slips into my arms so I'm cuddling her, my arms around her waist.

This feels so real, I hope this isn't gonna turn into a nightmare anytime soon.

"I love you Dimitri." She said into my chest. "I'm sorry for leaving you, leaving Lissa and everyone else." She snuggles closer to my chest.

"It's okay…" I said while running my fingers through her hair. Even though I say the words, I don't believe them. I'm angry at Roza for what she did, she left me. I'm angry at myself for letting this happen. Very much like when she was alive, Roza had my emotions in her grasp and can crush or cradle them. She snuggled closer, if possible.

"No, it isn't." She said. "You know it, I know it." She then breaks away from me, yet I can tell it's reluctant. She looks down at me.

"It'll be better if you move on." She said. "Forget about me; just think of me as the stunningly beautiful girl you mentored at St. Vladimirs." I smiled at her 'modesty'. Even when in a dream I know Roza in and out.

"Date that brunette that's in the next room, she's cute." She suggested.

"I'll date her if I was interested in incest, she's my sister." I said and Rose blushes. She gets off the bed and head to the window.

"Where you going?" I asked her, she turns to me.

"I'm leaving…" She said and didn't leave it up for discussion before leaping out the window.

**Lissa's P.O.V**

"These should relax you." Christian said and handed me two pills and a glass of water. I popped the pills in my mouth and gulped down the water.

"These aren't gonna hurt the baby is it?" I asked Christian, worried. I looked down at my bulging stomach. I was around five months pregnant and it was noticeable against my skinny frame. I hide it from prying eyes yet I bet people had their suspension. My main reason for this is the rebels are still loose and me being pregnant is just their advantage.

No way were they gonna harm my baby. I held my stomach in a protective manner and took a couple deep breaths. We were gonna learn the sex in a few weeks. Christian wanted another boy; he wanted a full family of boys. I want a girl, I love Andre yet I want another girl to talk to and until she can talk I can dress her up in bows, cute dresses and treat her like a real princess.

"There pregnancy safe, they'll help you sleep tonight. To stop you're worrying." He kisses my forehead and starts to leave.

"Wait, where are you going?" I asked him.

"To watch the college game." He said. "Adrian and me are breaking in the new T.V." I was glad Christian was having some bonding time with another man. Before the group got together it was just me and Christian. We didn't really have any friends unless they were politics related. Christian left, turning off the lights and soon after I feel into a deep, deep sleep.

_Clack, clack _

I scrunched my face and felt around the bed, cold sheets and pillows. Christian's not back. I turned and opened my eyes and met dark brown ones.

My eyes widened as I was about to scream yet her hand quickly shot out and covered my mouth.

"Don't scream, it'll complicate things." She quickly said and picked up the glass she must have knocked over, surprisingly it wasn't broken. She carefully lowered her hand, her posture still rigid.

"Dimitri was right…" I whispered she gave me a confused look. "You're alive." A big grin spread over my face as I reached out to hug her yet she jumped back as if I carried the plague.

"No, it's a hallucination." She said. "I'm dead, and you're in a drugged dream like state." My smile dropped before I could really even enjoy it and the hope that brewed up inside quickly dispenses making me feel oddly hollow.

"Don't worry Liss; I still live in your memories." She said smiling sweetly, almost tauntingly. I raised an eyebrow.

"When were you a doctor?" I asked. She shrugs and plops on the bed; I moved over and gave her more room.

"Dying does that to you." She said looking down, away from me. Damn, hallucination Rose just had to remind me. She looked over to me, about to say something but her eyes catch on to my baby bump. A few moments pass, her just looking at it. I was feeling a bit uncomfortable.

"How many months are you?" She asked. I pat my bulging belly affectionately and smiled a bit.

"Five, six months." I said and quickly grabbed her hand before she could react and placed in top of my stomach. "You feel that?" I asked the baby was doing small summersaults in my stomach, barely noticeable, more like a tickle under my skin.

"Sort of, it feels hard." She said taking her hand away but I still held it. "I can't believe Sparky got you pregnant…" She said under her breath.

"Twice." I said smiling. She rolled her eyes yet there was a small smile on her face, a few more moments passed, me still holding Rose's hand. Playing with her fingers and the nail polish that was on them.

Some odd hallucination. If I get to see Rose every time I take those stupid pills I'll never stop sleeping. My imagination is a cruel mistress, playing with my emotions yet giving me something even if it isn't real.

"Why didn't you answer in the séance?" I asked her, yet I didn't expect it to be intelligible since this is a hallucination and I'm actually just talking to myself. She looks at me.

"What séance?" She asked. I narrow my eyes in confusion then it clicks.

"Yeah, you weren't there so you wouldn't know." I said and look at her clothing; she must be an angel now, right? Yet why is she dressed in black.

Is she in hell?

_Calm down, Lissa – calm down, it's just a drugged induced dream. _

"You're not in hell, are you?" I couldn't stop myself from asking. She gives me a slight smile while looking down at my shoes.

"You can call it that…"

**Rose's P.O.V**

I plant the bug in Lissa's room, two actually. One for me, one for the rebels and I made sure the rebel ones was slightly damaged by dropping it in water, hopefully the coverage will come in choppy.

After the talk with Lissa I sent her back to sleep, she was already really tired taking those sleeping pills; I'm surprised I even got her up. When I'm drugged I'm pretty much dead.

Too soon for jokes.

Getting back out was the trouble, not that getting in was a breeze either. With Dimitri's room it was on the first floor all I had to do was tumble and I'm out. With Lissa it was nearly about 7 stories up not to mention the guardians patrolling the balcony's under and the ones in the towers above.

Lots of people that want to kill me.

A little too late for that.

Still too soon for jokes.

I looked back and saw Lissa's sleeping lumpy form. Damn Christian for getting her knocked up; couldn't he keep it in his pants? At a time like this a baby shouldn't be in the picture or any pregnant women. Lissa's just more vulnerable which is gonna be a real bitch to deal with. Better keep this from the rebels that is if they don't already know which I doubt it since she's bigger than Christian's ego.

I looked over the window ledge again and nervously bit my lip. Everyone seemed small from my view. No one was really out since it was about the afternoon – human time so the sun was shining, which just made me even more visible. Yet no one was really looking. I gave one last wishful look at Lissa before I stepped on the ledge and onto the first step.

Yes, steps outside the window. A few rebels are backing me up; of course they didn't hear the conversation between me and Lissa. I quickly started stepping down the 'steps' an air users was concentrating the air under my feet so it seemed as if I was running down steps. Finally I got down, unseen.

That's why I should be Lissa's guardian; I would notice a girl running on air. I made a mad sprint to the tree lines where the rebels were.

"Did you do it?" Cat asked. I nodded and tried not to show how out of breath I was. "Good, they should be able to hear from the den." We both started walking through the forest to where the Court's wards and walls were. A little hole was in their and both me and Cat could crawl through.

"I wish we could have just put a stake through her heart and been done with it." Cat said as we made it to the small city a few miles away from court to where Cat's car was.

"Why didn't you?" I asked even though I'm grateful they didn't I still wanted to know the game these 'Rebels' were playing. Cat stopped and looked up to the sky, her eyes tired and she ran her small fingers through her hair and took a few deep breathes.

"Something about finding the replacement. When that bitch dies we're gonna have one of our own on the throne, someone suitable to rule the Moroi and the guardians. Not the whinny bitch we have now." She said as she unlocked the door and we both climbed in.

"We keep teasing her with these attacks, Jeremy says it's like a mouse and cat game. Ever seen how a cat gets a mouse, it attacks it a few times, let it go and then pounce on it again, scratch it up before letting it go again. The mouse always try to get away, it's puny legs can only go so far before the cat gets it again. You can even hear it's small little cries of terror. Then the cat gets tired and just rip the mouse into bits. We're the cat and the Queen's the little mouse – I can't wait to hear her screams."

**A/N – Lots of action in the next chapter, and the reunion is only a few chapters away. I'll be updating this a little sooner since this is my favorite FanFic that I'm currently writing. **


	18. Chapter 18

**Disclaimer – Don't own any Vampire Academy stuff, all goes to the rightful owners. **

**Rose's P.O.V**

"We got 'em!" Yelled Jeremy as he took the head of the table. It was a poorly built table to, it was small and frail. The wood looked old and the only thing that held it up was four skinny legs, duck tape and willpower. It only held about five seats so me and a few others had to stand near the walls. It wasn't a big loss I mind you.

"The boss found the replacement, which means…" He said and looked around waiting for someone to answer.

"The death of the Queen!" Everyone yelled. I stayed silent yet I doubt anyone noticed.

"Yes! The boss gave me plans to go in tonight." Jeremy started and began to tell out the well thought plan to kill Lissa. It's been about two weeks since me and Lissa had our heart to heart, as well as me and Dimitri. I haven't been spying on them much, actually things been quite quiet here in the underground. Only a few select people get to hear what's on Lissa's bug.

Of course I hear things as well since I have one I implanted myself. Luckily she didn't mention me to Christian and she doesn't really say anything. Most of what's on the tape is small talk between the couple and love making sounds. I've seen worse interaction between them so it didn't bother me as much. All it made me think of was Dimitri.

I couldn't let myself think of him. Once in a while I do let myself go, let myself think of nothing else except for him. His brown eyes, tan skin – beautiful, god-like body and sweet talk that can have panties drop in a split second – it worked for me. These nights I usually scream in my pillow while crying uncontrollably.

My poor friend Britt didn't know what to do really. She was only a run-away kid, a forced run-away anyways. I've been gently coaxing her into going back home and she's close to breaking. I can't have her get caught up in the Rebel rumble, it could be the death of her and instead of visiting graveyards she'll be in one.

"So everyone ready?" Jeremy asked, apparently I've been zone out for quite some time. Everyone nodded vigorously. I looked over at Cat, the girl I can't consider a friend but more of someone I somewhat like, at least as much as I can like for a girl that only wants the downfall to my best friend. Cat raises her hand like a obedient little student. Jeremy rolled his eyes and call on Cat.

"Why are they springing this on us? We have to plan a big attack and we have to do it tonight, that's less that three hours." Cat had a point and this caused distresses among the crowd, it doesn't take much to get they're panties in a bunch.

"We've always had this plan, dear Kitty Cat. Just now putting it into action! Any more questions?" When no one raised they're hands, Jeremy split us into groups of five, each of us assigned a different task. I got put with Cat and three other moroi. Even though I'm part of they're 'circle' they still hold they're noses high and treat me as if I'm below them. Of course I have nothing else to do but take it, blowing my cover could mean costing Lissa her life. The rebels might have a plan but that doesn't mean I do. For the past weeks I've been winging it. Or studying the rebels is more like it. I've seen how they work and what they do.

Yet they did spring this on us, and some people already knew this was coming and practiced for it. Cat included and I'm new to this plan, actually I'm the only one. They weren't through the plan, briefly explaining it.

My part, was that we simply cause a mild distraction to her guardians but not one that get's the whole court in a frenzy or make anyone think this is another attack. Yet once they realized that it'll be to late and Jeremy will have his bony fingers around Lissa's neck. Over his dead body. Our team goes in first, I don't know what the others did but I do know Jeremy's team is the ones who go in for the kill.

I wish I was in that team, easier to kick they're asses and get my hands on Lissa. Yet I take what I can get, at least I'll be somewhat near her. Plus I might be able to ditch the group and protect Lissa.

We all took the three hours to get ready and brace ourselves. My teams simply got some bombs together. These bombs aren't like the blowing up building kind. For afar they'll seem like a regular teenage prank, yet if you step into the colorful fog you'll drop, not dead but you'll be out for a hour or two. That's pretty much our job. The next team comes in and do whatever they do and the other and so on.

We all have to move pretty fast since when they do come to terms that something's up all hell would break loose and we'll have to split to avoid getting arrested or killed. Our hiding place would a small little underground tunnel in the woods, I'll take that time to find Lissa and protect her. Hopefully.

Sooner than I liked the plan was in motion. Nightfall came and the moroi court was in full swing, Lissa was somewhere in her chambers and from the bugs we could tell she was relaxing and playing her with her son, Andre. The rebels were positioned at the gate. We were dressed in black jeans and hoodies with band tee-shirts it screamed rebellious teenagers. Which was what we were portraying ourselves as, at least my team the rest were dressed normally. The hoodies concealed our faces, if anyone seen us they'll be able to see that one of us is well over thirty. Cat and me were the only ones who can pass as a teen.

The rest of the rebels were in trees or out of the forest at the nearest human town, waiting to spring into action.

You could feel the nervousness and excitement in the air. The night was slightly windy, which wasn't on our side since the wind came separate the fog quicker and when the fog clears they'll see the limp bodies of guardians and know it isn't some teenage prank. Me and Cat were the first ones in.

"Ready, Marie?" She asked. I nod and put on my hood and look over at the people of the court, they don't really spare me and Cat looks but simply keeps on walking.

"If only they knew." Cat muttered under her breath. Cat and I went the closest building, which happen to be a part of the palace. The large grey stones wasn't the best spot for tagging, especially considering neither of us could actually draw that well.

I pulled out a spray can and simply drew a heart with a roughly drawn 'R' in the middle. "R is for Rebel right?" Cat asked. I nod, even though it's not true. R is for Rose, yet R can be for rebel to.

"Hey!" I heard someone say behind us. Cat and I turned our heads to see a very pissed of guardian heading our way. And the ball starts rolling…

I spring into action, with Cat close behind me. We run away from the palace, farther away from Lissa. I knew this guardian wasn't assigned to Lissa yet they didn't want any extra guardians around. Cat can't stop the giggle that leaves her lips as she sees the guardian chasing us around. Our intent was to lead the guardian into a fog of smoke that our others members did. I look back and see the guardian still hot on our trail, I quickly duck into a alley, which might seem as if I'm just trying to lose him yet of course nothing's as it seems in our group.

Once in the alley I see the bomb in place, already releasing the pink fog. Even though we're not in the fog I can still smell the very underline smell of it. Barely noticeable yet even that scent causes my vision to go blurry. I simply pinch my nose and run through it, Cat behind me.

The fog was long and tall yet with her nose's blocked we get out with only blurry eyes.

"We did it!" Cat said and high fives my hand. I nod and look into the fog, barely able to make out the body of the guardian.

"That must be some powerful fog." I point out. I can tell that the rebels are indeed handy with technology and magic and aren't afraid to use them for malicious purposes. Cat nods and smiles proudly.

"Of course it is, I helped make it." Cat said. "In high school I was a bit of a nerdy chemist, and proud of it."

"I hated chemistry, and all subjects really." I admit. "I just liked the ass kicking part."

Cat laughs as she pulls out another spray can out, this time only drawing some squiggly lines. "I loved chemistry but school was just another party in my opinion." I nodded yet I noticed that we were getting into the wrong subjects. If she get too much into it she'll remember Lissa and by remember Lissa she'll remember Rose – me. "Hey, the group says that we attracted the attention of the Royal guards!" Cat says while listening to her blue tooth. I turned mine's on and heard parts of the conversation.

"Three royal guards are noticing the smoke. One of them went to check it out, yet before the next group comes in we need to get at least twenty guards away from the – wait, what'd you say?" Cat yelled into the blue tooth. I quickly turn up my volume to hear the other end of the conversation.

"Shit! They know! Somehow they know, abort mission! Abort mission!" A guy from our group yells, me and Cat share a look before running into the direction of the gate. Our feet pound against the concrete and I hear the distant sound of running behind us.

I get a strange sense of Déjà vu, when me and Lissa were on the run. Hopefully we won't get the same outcome.

As the gate came into view so did the guardians that lined up, waiting for us.

"Ambush!" Cat screamed and stopped to turn around, only to meet another wall of guardians. My eyes widened and I took a few steps back and turned around again, hoping to somehow get pass the guardians and bail. Yet something stopped me in my tracks.

Dimitri.

He was noticeable among the group, and the connection we had before I was dead rises again, as if we can point out the other in a room full of people. It used to be a blessing, now a curse.

"Roza."


	19. Chapter 19

**Rose's P.O.V**

It all happens in fast motion. Of course, the guardian's aren't gonna take time to reminisce! In only a few seconds the guardians had the two of us cuffed and off to 'jail'. I don't hear Dimitri's voice again; actually I'm pretty sure I saw him running. The remaining guardians shove and push us into a small car where we'll be dragged off the jail.

Two unknown guardians are on either side of me and Cat, with one in the middle to stop us from doing whatever. It only made matters worse, being sandwiched between meaty guardians, getting caught and worse – getting caught by Dimitri.

Dammit!

I'm vaguely able to see other cars, similar to this one trucking off other rebels. Apparently this mission's been blown. Yet I could care less, no, actually this is a good thing. I won't have to run to save Lissa. Her guardians are aware of this and probably have some sort of lock-down going on. I can only imagine her emotions when Dimitri tells her about me.

Confusion, hurt, anger, relief?

Most likely doubt, hell that might be the only emotion she'll feel. I would if the positions were reversed. After three years and somebody suddenly wakes from the dead? That doesn't just happen. Only way to do that is by via spirit user. Britt was the only one at the graveyard that night and she's no spirit user. God, can you even imagine it. Britt, using spirit? That's a disater waiting to happen.

Everyone was quiet in the van, no one talked, almost as if the tension in the car was gas and a simple word will light the spark. Only sound was Cat's crying.

I almost wanted to hit her, no I did want to hit her.

Didn't this girl know what she was getting into? Didn't she want change and all that bullshit? Now she has the nerve to cry because things didn't go the way they planned. I let out a sigh and continued to look out the window. A few minutes passed before the guardian in the passenger seat in front turned around to look at us.

"We're close to the destination, you two will be –" He stopped suddenly, at the moment I was too busy looking at the patterns on my pants, tuning everything out. I looked up to see the guardian looking back at me. Those hazel brown eyes along with the old messy sandy blond hair.

Eddie.

"Rose." He breathed; this caught some of the guardian's attention, except for the driver.

"Her name isn't Rose, it's Marie. Dumbass." Cat said, stopping her tears momentarily.

"Marie?" Eddie asked puzzled. "Oh, Rose_marie. _It's pronounced Rose_mary_, dumbass." Eddie shot back. Eddie was never mean to anyone, especially a girl yet tense situations call for it. Eddie turned back to me, his eyes wide again with wonder.

"You're dead." He stated and it was the most unobvious, obvious thing to say. "I saw you hanging. When the dorm matron opened the door, I saw you there, bloody and pale…" He trailed off, his eyes glossy with tears. Eddie never cried, only time I've seen him cry was when Mason died. I'm pretty sure he felt like he failed his best friend by letting his best friend was like below the belt.

If I'm the cause of more Eddie tears, I'm positive I'm going to hell.

"I get it, Eddie." I said looking down, ashamed. If facing Eddie like this is hard, telling Lissa would be heartbreaking. "I'm sorry."

"Rosemarie Hathaway!" Cat said which caused the guardians to tense around her. "Rosemarie Hathaway, people say her spirit cries around her dorm where she committed suicide. One time some mean girls made me sleep in her dorm for a whole day. Now I know I shouldn't have cared because that BITCH was still up and running!"

"That's an awesome way to put it." I muttered. I wanted to remind Cat that around the time that time I was still dead. Hell maybe I did haunt the halls of , I don't remember anything from when I was dead.

"You've lied to us." Cat said, darkly. "The Rebellion trusted you, and you betrayed us for that blond bimbo! You'll pay for this!"

"We're here, ladies." One of the guardians said. "Continue your feud inside." As they were pushing me out I vaguely heard Eddie arguing, in my defense yet they hauled me away anyways, all while Cat was shooting my daggers and muttering 'traitor' under her breath.

Once inside, they separated me and Cat, well, sort of anyways. Cat got the cell in front of mine. Several off the other rebels were also in the cells, yet due to moroi rules everyone got their own cell and even more rebels were pouring in. After about ten minutes around 90 percent of the rebels were in cells, the main group, Jeremy's got away. But I'm sure after a series of intense integration they'll be here to.

Most weren't talking, simply glaring at the guardians who kept them in check. Cat threw daggers are me continuously, not even noticing anyone or anything else.

"What's happen to the Queen?" I asked. The line of cells fall silence at my question. To anyone else, I seem like I wanted something bad to happen yet to Cat, she knew it was concern and voiced it.

"Didn't want something to happen to your best friend, Rose?" Cat asked with heavy mockery. "We'll kill her anyways-"

"Enough!" The guardian said, making Cat shutter, her turned to me, his eyes cold. "The Queen is perfectly fine, and you low lives won't hurt her."

Good, I thought in my head.

I hear the groans of the other rebels around the hall; the guardian simply rolls his eyes and walks down the line, checking on the others. I turn around so I don't have to see the glares of Cat, and I take in my cell.

It's small, plain and white. There's only a silver toilet, with no covering and a bed with thin sheets. There are no lights in the cell, the only light coming in from the hall. Pretty boring, I'd rather have the medieval dungeon, with chains, rats and some poor men's skeleton. Much better scenery in my opinion.

I flop on the bed, yet regret it when I feel the springs press against my ass. I sigh and lay down anyways and look up at the plain white ceiling. There were small tiles on top, since I have nothing better to do – I start counting.

1, 2, 3…

**Lissa's P.O.V**

Another attack, I'm not surprised.

I'll be the biggest moron in the world to say I was 'surprised'. No, I can sense it coming a mile away. If they thought they caught me off guard they are sadly mistaken. I look at the worried blue eyes of Christian. He looks at me so intensely that I'm scared his eyes might fall out of his head. I advert my eyes, Christian is one of the most laid back people I know, a close second to Adrian and seeing him stress, and over me is not a great thing.

I rub my bulging stomach to comfort the baby inside, it's kicking is restless. Maybe knowing I'm stress is making it worry for its mother. I sigh and run my fingers through my blond hair. I wish I could sit, yet the small room leaves no room for sitting. There's not even a chair.

When the news of an attack got to my guardians they huddled me out of my quarters and squeezed me in a small room on ground zero. About five feet below ground. The room was very small. Made of steel, or some sort of protective walls that could reflect bullets. Most of my guardians were outside, since not all could fit into the small room. It was made for about twenty people, at the most and that's includes breathing room. The room was no crowded with around thirty, plus Christian and Andre. The others were guarding the door outside.

Now I was in the corner of the room, with Christian next to me and the other guardians around, mushed against each other. They were trying to give me room yet it wasn't really helping. It felt crowded yet it was safe. I'd rather be uncomfortable then dead. Andre also picked up the tension; his large eyes darted around the room. Taking in one face after another and the unfamiliar faces made him uneasy. It was only a matter of time before he starts wailing.

I'd rather be uncomfortable than dead. I'd rather be uncomfortable than dead. I kept repeating that over in my head.

"Don't invite anyone in." I heard my head guardian say. "I don't care, we don't have room and we can't trust anyone." He said into the ear piece. "Would you like me to pass on a message?"

This caught my attention. I've been in this place for less than a few minutes yet I already wanted to pull my hair out and chock on it. The guardian turned to me.

"Your majesty, Dimitri Belikov wanted to pass on a message, would you like to hear it?" I nod. "He said that Rose is alive."

I froze, my uncomfortable state forgotten. _Rose is alive. _Three simple words to make my heart stop, and make me go rigid. This isn't possible…

No, no it isn't. It's not real, I'm dreaming. This is a nightmare, or a horrible hallucination for those god damn pills. In reality, I'm still in bed, I'm still under the blankets with Christian right beside me. I close my eyes hoping to block the fantasy world out. To block the nightmare.

I felt someone shaking me, several seconds later. I open my eyes to see Christian looking at me. Yet I also saw the other guardians peering at me from behind me, I'm not in my bedroom and I'm still in that damn place.

"Lissa, I don't want you to go into shock." Christian said and looked over at the guardian. "You must have translated that wrong, can you ask them again?" The guardian nodded and talked into his blue tooth again.

"No I didn't translate that wrong, he said R-" Christian didn't let the guardian finish before snatching the blue tooth out of his ear.

"Put Guardian Belikov on." He barked into the small device. He handed Andre over to me. I had to adjust since my stomach got in the way yet I managed. I laid him on my chest and made soothing circles on his back. Christian turned away from me so I couldn't see his face yet the way his body tensed told me everything.

"Check again, dammit!" He said. "It's impossible and why would she be with them? All she wanted to do was protect her…"

Are they talking about Rose?

They have to be. Rose was always my protector for as long as I could remember.

"_Rose, he stole my doll!" I cried to Rose who was playing the sandbox, shoving some sand in some other child's mouth. _

"_Lissa, don't you want me to help? I am your big brother." Andre huffed as he looked at the small girl who was his sister's protector. _

"_You're not strong enough." I whined. "I want her." I pointed a finger at Rose who was smiling widely. Rose stuck her tongue out at Andre. _

"_I'll beat his ass for you Liss." Rose said and folded her arms over her small chest. _

"_Rosemarie! We don't use that kind of language." Our teacher said shaking her finger at Rose. Rose shrugged and got out of the sandbox, leaving the poor kid coughing up sand everywhere. _

_Rose stumped over to the kid on the swings that had my doll in his hands. He held her by her hair and swung her body up and down as he moved on the swing. Rose stood near him and when he got to her level, she yanked him down and he feel hard onto the ground. _

"_You have something of my friends." Rose said sticking her hand out, waiting 'patiently' for the doll. _

"_Beat it Hathaway, Barbie is about to be burned." He said and smiled evilly. He looked at the doll and suddenly little tiny holes burned onto the doll, her face, body, dress and legs. He was young therefore didn't have much magic and didn't specialize yet he could still work some magic – enough to damage my doll. _

"_My doll!" I screamed and snatched it away, this time he willingly gave it but only because it was beyond repair. The devilish boy smiled at me yet Rose wasn't having any of it. _

_I don't know how she did it, yet the guy end up looking like a pretzel afterwards. _

Rose was always there for me, yet at the time she needed me, I couldn't return the favor…

**Rose's P.O.V**

The sound of something cracking woke me from my much needed nap. I jolted up and looked across to see Cat was passed out on her cot, maybe being tired out from insulting me. I saw the guardian who was in front of my cell look around, obviously hearing the noise as well.

"What was that?" I asked groggily, wiping some sleep from my eyes. I got up from my bed and steadied myself on the floor. The guardian got up from his chair and looked up at the ceiling. The ceiling of my cell looked fine, yet the crumbs that fell on the guardian told me something was up. Literally.

I walked to the bars of my cells and held onto them. I looked up to see a large crack forming at the ceiling.

"What the fuck?" The guardian in front of me asked. I shrugged but knew the question wasn't directed at me.

"Faulty ceiling?" I suggested yet I knew the Court was state of the art, everything. However, why would you spend so much money on criminals? The guardian was about to comment but a large boom silence him. The aftershock sent me the ground. The floor rumbled beneath me, causing more unrest. Luckily my cell was pretty stable and handled the small earthquake.

"Was that an earthquake?" I asked.

"Here?" He asked skeptically. He called down to the other guardians down the hall who of course felt it, they talked to each other and pretty much ruled out my earthquake theory, since well, we're in Pennsylvania and well those last for minutes, we got a small crack, a bang and a rumble.

The guardians were cut off by another bang, this time it collapsed the ceiling. It happened in only a number of seconds. A loud boom and more crackles and everything get cloudy and the smell of dry wall and paint gets into my nose making me cough while trying to get that shit out of my eyes.

I couldn't hear anything besides the sound of more falling rocks and parts of walls. I heard a few voices, all yelling yet I couldn't make out the words.

"Marie! Marie!" I heard someone yell. I struggle to see through the fog and can barely make out a figure through it. It was a male and by the way he called me, a Rebel.

"Marie, are you here?" He asked, the voice sounded unfamiliar.

"Where else would I be?" I asked through the coughs. My voice was raspy and dry. The figure emerged and I got a good view of his face. I recognized him as one of the people in Jeremy's group; they probably came since almost 90 percent of their group was locked up. He didn't respond to my sarcasm only helped me up.

I looked around and saw that most of the ceiling collapsed. Most of the cells were below ground with nothing on top, yet another part of the cells were on top of a guardian building which I could clearly see from where I was standing. Luckily it wasn't much damage to that building.

The cells were almost all ruined. The walls collapsed, leaving gaping holes for someone to simply walk through. Even though the bomb, I'm guessing that's what they used, took more damage to the guardians it did hurt some rebels. Like the cell next to mine was completely collapsed. I even saw some blood seeping out through the rubble. It mixed with the blood of the guardians that were in the way.

An aching pain was in my chest when I saw the corpse of a guardian, a large piece of rock crushing his skull. All our lives we were told to protect the moroi from strigoi or other threats. It's like stabbing a stake in our hearts when the people we protect, kill us.

I looked over at Cat's cell which wasn't badly hurt like mine. She only had a few scratches and seemed like she was coughing up a lung. I heard Jeremy's voice from the end of the hall, calling everyone near so we could hurry and leave. Yet I couldn't…

After Cat gets less disoriented, she'll rat me out. I know at first people won't believe her, yet when they see me and a clear picture of me before, well, it won't be rocket science to put two and two together. I ran, or more like stumbled over to the staircase that led to the building above. My leg was badly injured in the bombing, nothing life threating yet it hurt like a bitch.

I could hear in the distant the sirens of guardians coming and the yelling of the rebels. The large door in front of me was my old obstacle between me and freedom. Luck wasn't on my side though; the door received no damage due to the bombing. It was a large steel door with punch code that unlocked it. Of course I didn't know the code.

Panicked I start pressing random numbers, yet got a loud beep in return. Damn modern technology!

"No, I'm serious. She's Rosemarie Hathaway! I swear it; she's working with the queen!" I hear Cat yell. This only caused more panic from me.

123

345

865

345

I only got 4 more loud beeps. I bang on the board in frustration, only to have more of a 'ding' noise. I smile widely as I see the red light switch to green.

Yes, yes!

"There she is."

No, no!

I quickly open the door and storm through, only to be met with more rubble and chaos. The people who worked at the office, some of the unlucky bastards fell through the floor, only to land on more rubble. Papers were everywhere along with glass, bodies and other things.

I looked through the door to see a man running up the steps to get to me. I quickly close the door, yet we both meet at the same time and which is hand is caught between the thresholds. He screams as the large door slams on his wrist. I had no intention of cutting this man's hand off; apparently we shared the same though because his arm retreated. I didn't waste any time, the moment the door closed I was running again. Jumping over the large holes that lead the cells and avoiding guardians.

When I finally made it outside, the moonlight was blinding. Being trapped mostly inside all day didn't really help my case.

I didn't want to walk around mindlessly around the court yet that's what I'll have to do. Maybe get out and go to my apartment, I'm sure Britt is having a conundrum at the moment since I'm not usually out this long.

Maybe I should go through -

I didn't even notice that I began walking and hit face first on a warm wall. I bounced back yet before my ass could hit the ground a large hand wrapped around my wrist and gently pulled me up.

"Thanks." I said and tried to pull away, yet the strong arms kept me incase close to the stranger's body. Before I could look up to the face, he already bent down to my ear which gave me a whiff of his aftershave. "Let me go." I said but my voice wasn't strong, I was already faltering in his touch.

"I'm not letting you go this time, Roza."

**A/N – Sorry I died on you guys! Hopefully the long chap made up for it? By the way, is the Fan Fiction protest/ban thing happening tonight at midnight, or did it happen yesterday?**


	20. Chapter 20

**Rose's P.O.V**

The brown eyes that used to melt me are now the reason I'm frozen. How can I be frozen but warm all over? His arms incased me in their familiar trap, tensing up my muscles for anticipation of…what?

It used to be love making; now it's for him to chew me out and take me to the Queen.

"Roza." He whispered over and over again, saying my nickname like a prayer. "How could you leave me?" He asked I barely heard it; it was so low and quiet. I believe it was more of a rhetorical question than something he wanted me to answer. So I didn't, because truthfully I didn't have the answer. He didn't loosen his grip any, if anything he got tighter, not wanting me to flee – which is what I would have did if it was anyone else.

After a few minutes of him simply hugging me he stepped back, his hands still clamped on my slim shoulders. From this view I could see redness in his eyes, some tears falling down his perfect brown eyes. Dimitri cries, I didn't really think crying was something he could actually do. First Eddie now Dimitri - its official, causing two strong men to cry over me, I'm going to hell. He brushed a few strands out of my face, from the wind blowing about. The way Dimitri looked at me with such intensity made me want to crumble beneath him; he's never looked at me this way before. His eyes held, grief, disappointment and mostly love.

"Let me go." I said after a few more moments, my voice wasn't strong and seemed to drift away with the breeze. Dimitri's face registers confusion and hurt. Did he seriously think I wanted to just stay here? I love him, a little too much, yet I can't face the fact of what I did. I'm a coward – a dumb coward.

Dimitri face hardens and the guardian mask slips on. Blocking his emotions, he wipes the fallen tears and looks back at me. His hand goes out to touch my cheek, resting there and trails down to my hip, the simple touch of this man making me go wild. His hand rest on my hip before his other drops down from my shoulder and grabs on my other side – roughly I might add.

It all happens in a matter of seconds as Dimitri lifts me and throws me on his shoulder like a sack of potatoes. I bump my head against his hard back. "W-w-what are you doing?" I scream as I hit his back with my fist.

"Taking you away from here." Dimitri said and started to run, I lift my head and I see the direction he's going in is the palace. I doubt Lissa still there because of the attack but still that's her home. Please don't take me there, please don't take me there…

"Guardian Belikov, requesting entrance to Queen Vasilisa's quarters." Dimitri said into the speaker box when we arrive at the entrance of the palace.

"Request granted." A man said from the box. Dimitri opened the doors and inside was the palace lobby, which was crowded with scared moroi and calming guardians. Apparently the rebels attack wasn't just shaking up the Queen. Everyone shouting out, trying to be heard. Dimitri moved effortlessly through the crowd, I hid my face in his back and ignored the noise. We made it to the elevators, which luckily were empty. When the steel doors closed, he still held onto me.

"Let me go." I repeated. "I'm not just some rag doll." I protested, I heard Dimitri chuckle, the sound that warms my still beating heart.

"Same old Roza." He whispered and at that moment the elevator dinged. Maneuvering my neck I could see a long wide hallway, several doors adorned the halls and at the end double wooden doors with the plaque – Queen Vasilisa. From the Rebels Intel I knew that this hall is usually filled with guardians outside Lissa's door.

Dimitri walked down the hall, entered a code in Lissa's door. Dimitri then grabbed the handles and opened the door. He closed it behind me, and from me being in here once I knew the place. The large living room you walked into with leather couches, glass coffee tables, crystal chandelier, flat screen and a bar in the corner. A large kitchenette with state of the art appliances and through the door a large dining hall. Ahead of us was a grand stair case which leads up to the bedrooms.

Dimitri walked me over to the couch and gently set me down. He held me down and sat directly across from me. Ours eyes met, for a split second and I quickly looked away. I wasn't gonna cry, I won't show weakness…

"Roza, look at me." Dimitri said gently. Was he mad? He didn't seem like it, yet I did detect something that I detest – pity. Now I have him pitying me, whose next? Lissa, Eddie – Christian? Dimitri hand rested on my knee, I could tell he wanted to say something else however my thoughts were worse than anything he can say. I ran, jumping up from the couch and leaping over the coffee table and up the stairs. Dimitri was right on my heels, I was like a bat from hell and even his long legs and crazy speed by sheer willpower I was able to make it to Lissa's bedroom down the hall, I quickly shut the door, twisting the lock.

"Rose, please let me in!" I heard Dimitri say from the other side. My eyes blurry with tears I find a chair in the room and stuff it under the knob – like I've seen in a few movies before. I saw the door visibly shaking with Dimitri pounding on the other end, yet it was pretty high quality wood.

I look at the ground, it suddenly looking very inviting. I slump on the floor, bringing my knees to my chest and rest my cheek on my knees. I finally let the tears fall, the burning in my eyes becoming too much. I hold onto myself tighter, as if this might help to stop me from falling apart.

**Lissa's P.O.V**

When I was finally released – one day later, I was quickly sent to my quarters. Several guardians, the ones I was closest with would always be with me inside my apartment, excluding the bathroom. I didn't mind, well, I minded a little, small price to pay for life though. I walked into my apartment to see it tidy as always, only difference was that Dimitri was sitting on the bottom of the stairs, running his fingers through his hair and looking exhausted.

Anger radiated from me when I saw him, with my guardians close in tow I walked up to Dimitri. When he saw me he quickly sat up, with only a few steps I was right in his face, more like a few inches shorter than him. With all the might I had, which wasn't much, I took my hand and slapped him across the face.

He didn't even flinch.

My hand on the other hand (no pun intended) felt like it was on fire, of course I kept that information to myself. "How dare you!" I scream at him. I felt Christian and Adrian behind me, probably looking at me with confused eyes. Dimitri looks down at me in bewilderment.

"Tell me that Rose is alive!" I shouted, anger radiating off me. "I'm already going through hell, you telling me something like this is worse than any rebel attack. It's taking my hopes up and smashing them…" I trailed off, the sobs overtaking me. I would like to blame hormones, yet we all know that pregnant or not – I'll end up crying anyways.

"I should kick your ass, Belikov!" Adrian said walking up to him and jamming a finger in his chest. "But I doubt me, a drunk, chain-smoking moroi can beat up a 6'7 guardian who probably works out everyday, yet the thought is there." Adrian finished rubbing the back of his neck in embarrassment.

"Nice going, Adrian." Christian said who's been pretty quiet during this whole ordeal. "Come one, guys. Let's let Dimitri at least explain himself before we throw him in the pit, okay?" Adrian snorted at Christian request; he already didn't like Dimitri, throwing him 'in the pit' was an easy option and one that appealed the Adrian very much so.

I wiped my eyes, coming to the sense of letting Dimitri at least explain. He was gonna be my guardian one day, plus he's still pretty protective of me and I should know that he wouldn't hurt me like this. "Dimitri?" I said, giving him the opportunity to explain.

And explain he did.

He launched into this story, how he had suspensions ever since the fight in my house where he swears he saw Rose's eyes. He got even more a suspension when he apparently had a 'dream' of her, he swore up and down that it was no dream. Even if he was a little dazed. He admits Amelia's death confused him, the way she committed 'suicide', he told me with air quotes, apparently not believing that Amelia took her own life. All these things added up strangely, including the missing body along with the Britt ordeal and don't even get me started on the séance. The whole things still gives me creeps, but Dimitri was calm in explaining all of it.

"One more thing." He said after he was finished, he looked at the stair case, then back to me and the group. "She's upstairs."

My eyes widened and my jaw dropped. I could practically feel my heart beating its way out of my chest, pumping against my ribs. So far the far fetched tale Dimitri has told grabbed my attention, did I believe it? My heart said yes, any lead on getting Rose back. The logic side said you can't get something that's dead, back. Before I could reply, a small thump came from above our heads.

The guardians, although trained to give privacy, while protecting had picked up small bits of the conversation. They didn't know Rose, yet everyone knew of her. Being the former Queen's best friend, bondmate, and guardian drew people's attention.

"Who's upstairs?" One guardian asked Dimitri. If Dimitri was annoyed he didn't show it.

"Rose, I left her up there for about a day, I put food and water outside her door yet she doesn't come out. I only here occasional thumps and the toilet flushing." Dimitri answered evenly. Two guardians ascended up the stairs, minutes later I heard a door crack and a women's scream. I didn't think twice before going up the stairs, two at the time, my body apparently ignoring the facts that I was five months pregnant. I ran into my room, out of breath and sweaty, my frail moroi body couldn't take gravity, pregnancy and the large steps at the same time. I quickly looked around and saw two guardians, holding a woman by her wrist, her clothes looking tattered and some bandages wrapped poorly over her ankle.

"Rebel?" One guardian asked.

"Or Rose."

Their words barely registered on my brain, my eyes stuck onto the girl between the guardians, her dark hair creating a veil between her and the world, concealing her face. Footsteps came from behind me, I felt the comforting touch of Christian beside me yet there were too many footsteps to be just him, the whole gang is probably here along with a few of my other guardians.

"Is it Rose?" Christian whispered, barely audible even to my super-natural ears. I slowly walk to her, the guardians on high alert.

"Careful, she might hurt you." One guardian said. I ignored the warning and stepped closer to the trembling girl, fear seemed to seep out of her and through me. She was so tormented; I didn't need to see her aura to know that.

"She wouldn't hurt me." I whispered. _She's my best friend. _I added silently.

I took a lock of her dark hair, it felt so familiar. I should remember, I always begged to do her hair when we were little kids, being introduced to the girly world of being a teen. Me more than her who only wanted to get down and dirty with the boys.

I moved the lock from her face, and my breath caught. I know those eyes, that face. The one who I spent my childhood with, who I grieved so heavily for, who I never forgot.

"Welcome back, Rose."

**A/N – No excuse for being late with this update, like super late. Summer's been busier than expected; I kind of hoped to just lie on the couch while watching cartoons. All dreams much die sooner or later right? :-) **


	21. Chapter 21

**Disclaimer – I don't own V.A**

**Rose's P.O.V **

For a moment it was paralyzing silence. I could hear the beating of the soft rain against the windows and the steady breathing of the guardians holding me. Surprisingly Lissa was silent, I was looking down couldn't bare actually looking at her. She simply welcomed me, now what?

"I can't believe this…" I heard someone mutter, sounding like Christian. "Unbelievable."

"Thanks guys, but Rose isn't a threat." Lissa said her voice strong. Not like what I expected, I thought she'll be crying, hugging and running my jacket with her tears and snot. The guardians gently let me go; I stood in the middle of the room awkwardly. The guardians didn't leave the room – whether it's because they were protecting Lissa or wanted to see the drama unfold.

I grudgingly looked up, to see Lissa's face wasn't as hard as I thought. Her green eyes were water with tears that threatened to fall. She looked a little older than I remembered, not exactly with age, but more of experience. Her blond hair was a couple inches longer, falling to her mid-waist instead of upper back. She of course glowed with her pregnancy as well.

"Rose." She said the simple word broke my heart; it was full of heartbreak and relief. It was only seconds before she pulled me into a hug, wrapping her slim arms around my waist. It was an awkward hug, considering my arms were hanging limply at my sides and her big stomach was blocking us. "I've missed you." She said, and with that the water works fell, I felt the tears on my neck.

"I missed you to, Liss." I said and wrapped my arms around her. After a few seconds she pulled back, wiped her eyes and looked back at everyone. They all looked the same.

Christian seemed older, like Lissa. The same old smug look was on his face, the trade mark smirk that almost looked like a smile. Adrian, well he looked like Adrian. A little more stress with the bags under his eyes, yet he didn't look hung-over. Surprisingly.

"Can I have a minute please?" I asked them. Lissa seemed a little disappointed, she probably thought that now that I'm back that we'll do all the girl stuff we missed out on before. Lissa nodded and told everyone to leave me alone for a while. The guardians as well left, even though they were like shadows I wanted to be _completely alone_.

When they were gone I walked around Lissa's room a little more, taking everything in. Glancing around I viewed photo's that I paid no mind since I was mostly in here feeling sorry for myself. One photo was in a steel frame, it was Lissa and Christian. Lissa looked gorgeous in a white wedding dress; it was only her upper half so I couldn't see the whole thing. However the top was stunning enough, with silver beaded embroidery and had a sweet heart neckline. Christian was in a nice tux plain tux, and was smiling into the camera. Both looked very happy, of course it was there wedding day. I wonder what would have happened if I was there, most likely me teasing Christian and calming Lissa because of the big step she was going to do.

I wonder how it went. Did Lissa still enjoy every minute? Hopefully, even though I wasn't there I didn't loom at the back of her head when she was saying her vows to Christian? I gazed at the picture for several more seconds before moving onto another one, one right above the large fireplace.

This one had a wooden frame and looked more homely. The picture was of the beautiful couple again, this time Lissa was heavy with child. It had a blue backdrop; Christian was standing behind Lissa, having his fingers shaped like a heart on her naked stomach. Lissa looked down with joy as the shot was taken.

I moved on to the next, which wasn't taken professionally and depending where it was, maybe taken by some nurse. It was obvious it was in a hospital with Lissa holding her new born baby. Her hair looked sweated out and she had a tired look in her eyes yet she had a big smile on her face, Christian wasn't even looking at the camera he was behind Lissa, looking down at their new baby boy.

If Dimitri and I were together and I had to see Lissa go through the pregnancy, birth and motherhood I would probably be jealous, among being happy for Lissa of course, yet that would just be something Dimitri and I couldn't have…

Now, I have more substantial problems besides reproductive issues.

I turn away from the pictures, it suddenly dawning on me that this is _real_. I'm in Lissa's bedroom, she knows I'm alive. I've been dead for three years and everyone knows the truth…

The urge to curl into a ball or run was dominate; however, I was Rose Hathaway. Not some crying girl who ran whenever it was problem, excluding when Lissa and I took a joy ride for two years. I looked at her bed, wanting to just take a nap, and avoid the world.

Even a hero needs sleep.

**Dimitri's P.O.V**

I couldn't really explain how I felt, happy of course yet everything else was up in the air.

_She's alive. _

The measly thought sent my emotions hay wire, just like Rose did with her mere presence. The last time I was in Rose's presence was at her funereal, with an oak wood coffin separating us. Would that even count?

I sat on Lissa's plush couch; everyone was crowded in the living room. You'll expect everyone to be excited, talking non-stop. Everyone was silent, almost waiting for this dream to end. Christian kept pacing, Adrian was eyeing a bottle of whisky, probably trying to decide if that bottle had anything to do with him hallucinating, Lissa was muttering things so low a Strigoi most likely wouldn't hear, along with that she kept pinching herself.

Now where did that leave me? Nothing, I wasn't as calm or void as I looked on the outside. In the inside it was a party, but no one knew why they were celebrating.

"What now?" Adrian asked, breaking contact with the whisky and looking at us. "Whoa, look at these auras!"

"Adrian, we don't have time for this." Christian spat and continued pacing.

Adrian ignored Christian. "I expected as much, you'll all be as happy as you are bitter." This stopped everyone from their doings, everyone gave Adrian bitter looks.

"We're not bitter, Adrian." Lissa said bitterly. "We're happy Rose is…alive, no need to have old grievances. I'm happy, aren't we all?" Lissa asked, yet it sounded to forced, like she was pushing herself to believe it. I had no doubt that we all shared joy (and confusion) in this. Bitterness was the unknown emotion, the one even I was scared to uncover. I didn't want to be bitter, I love her.

Yet, she left me. She left all of us, and didn't even bother with a good-bye. It was hell going back to St. Vladimirs and learning that the love of my life was dead, not killed by Strigoi, any other trouble, but to learn that she did this to herself. To us…

Yes, I admit, I'm bitter and angry.

"Don't bother hiding it, at least not when it's just us." Adrian said. "When Rose is around, everyone pretend like you all have a pocket full of fucking sunshine." Everyone nodded, not caring that Adrian Ivashkov was the man giving us this information.

"Good, now that that's settled, who wants some whisky?"

The day after, everything was still in its dream like state. I met up at the Queen's quarters after I dropped Viktoria off at college, happy that's she's not guarding that stuck up Royal. At Lissa's place I half expected Rose down here, eating breakfast with the rest. Instead it looked like I stepped into some awkward meeting.

"Want any pancakes, Dimitri?" Lissa asked, being courteous as always. I shake my head; I had a big breakfast before I came. Plus I wasn't big on pancakes.

"Is Rose still upstairs?" I asked taking a seat, even though I denied pancakes, Lissa still brought me black coffee.

"Yup, she never left. A few minutes turned to hours and into a night." Christian explained, I already knew though, considering I stayed till two in the afternoon. I had a busy day ahead and I could have only gotten a few hours of sleep. I was running on coffee and willpower.

"Should I go talk to her?" Lissa asked nervously while twirling her thumbs. "She's probably hungry, and tired."

"Why should she be tired, she has king size bed upstairs. Unlike the rest of us who had to endure the couches with a thousand pound pregnant lady on top of us." If looks could kill – Christian would be dead, the daggers Lissa threw at him can even have the oldest of Strigoi whimpering.

"Don't you have a guest room?" I asked, she is Queen. Even as Queen Lissa was practical, not getting a large mansion but a nice little condo. Yet with her growing family, Christian and Lissa better start thinking of better alternatives.

"We do, but _someone _insisted to get the new baby's nursery together even though said baby is was only thirteen weeks at the time – which eliminated our prestigious guest room." Christian said rubbing his eyes.

"I decided to bail about a few minutes after you left, Belikov. That couch was beautiful, but it's about as stiff as my mother's personality." Adrian said while sipping some coffee.

"And we couldn't leave since it's our house." Christian said.

"Nor would we want Rose to come down to an empty house." Lissa said, her anger diffused at Christian's pregnancy comment. "I'll set a plate outside of her door, just incase." Lissa said and went into the kitchen to fix Rose something.

"We got to figure out what to do with her." Christian said. "How are we gonna explain this?"

"First we need to learn what happened, then we explain." I told him sipping my coffee. "Only Rose and maybe Britt would know." I said.

"Oh, that little trouble maker," Adrian grumbled and slumped in his chair. "Let's not involve her, if we find her we can just catapult her back to her mother."

"I don't care about how it happened, just that it happened." I said. I was always the man who wanted to the 'who's, how's and what's' of a situation, but sometimes there's an exception, Rose is the beautiful exception.

"What if it's a lie?" Christian asked, breaking us out of the comfortable silence. He didn't have to further explain, we all knew. We all shot glances at each other, not daring to answer. We didn't want to believe it could have all been a lie, how could we?

_But it could have happened. _

It is a practical, well as practical as you can get with Rose. But would she do this to us? Lie about living? I can't even be sure which one I'll prefer. Rose getting taken over by darkness and stealing her own life, or pretending to.

Her not actually being dead, I'd rather her running around the world – alive, yet dead to the world than her being six feet under with maggots crawling out of her empty eye sockets. Can't even believe that I even thought to wish otherwise.

Lissa came down the stairs, holding the plate she was supposed to give to Rose. Lissa looked back up the stairs, waited at the bottom for a few seconds. With my hearing I could make out other footsteps stepping down. My heart raced, would I see her again? The first meeting didn't go well, I barely saw her face and all she wanted to do was get away from me.

She slowly came into view, her head down and her dark hair hung around her face, she looked skinner – fragile, almost. All I wanted to do was whisk her away, and carry her in the sunset to safety. I doubt she'll let me touch her…

Rose didn't look up, she let Lissa guide her by gently pulling her arm to the table. Rose sat directly in front of me, but she would let us see her beautiful face, keeping her head down and playing with her fingers under the table. Lissa put the food in front of Rose and slipped back into her place at the table.

"So what were we talking about?" Lissa asked, trying to establish normalcy for Rose's sake.

"Catapults." Adrian answered. Lissa raised an eyebrow yet didn't question.

"_Your highness?" _A timid voice said over the speaker box. Lissa walked over to the door, where the small box was.

"Yes, what do you need?" Lissa asked and leaned on the wall.

"_You have a visitor, someone named – I'm sorry, what's your name again?" _I hear mumbling on the other end. _"Britt Patterson." _

"Hell no!" Christian said immediately, the tone that leaves no room for argument.

"This might be the time to get a catapult." Adrian said, looking at the bright side.

Lissa looked at the two men with amusement. "Nope, we'll send Britt up here; she has a bit of explaining to do."

Lissa hit the button. "Send her up."

**A/N – Sorry, this chapter isn't great. I need Idea's, anyone? PS – I don't see many Eddie and Jill fics, why is everyone so bent on him being with Mia? **


	22. Chapter 22

**Lissa's P.O.V**

Britt, what a rebellious teen, she had the air that said 'I don't give a fuck'. From the few times I've seen this girl, she did manage some emotion besides indifference, like nervousness. It was almost funny to see her at the breaking point, and I've only laid my gaze on her.

"Come in, Britt." I said and moved out the way for the moroi girl to come in. She awkwardly made her way in the living room; her eyes traveled everywhere, even though she's already seen it. Her eyes lay on Rose, who was in the dining room, still looking at her plate, only occasionally taking a bite – chewing for a few minutes, and staring at the plate again. "Sit on the couch." I told her, seeing her want to go over to Rose. Adrian guides her over to the couch were she plants herself.

"I came to speak to Rose," Britt said. _'Oh no, and here I thought you were coming for breakfast…' _

"Well speak." I said and gestured to Rose who was still looking at her breakfast, she seemed as if she was totally oblivious to the world around her, but I knew otherwise, Rose still had her guardian training, seeming ignorant of these events she knew exactly what was going on. Britt looked hesitant, as if I was just screwing with her and would do something the moment she moved. I wouldn't put it pass me. Her brown eyes darted to everyone in the room before she slowly got up from the couch she's been on for a mere second, and her skinny legs made it over to the dining table.

She sat were Dimitri previously been, across from Rose. They spoke in hushed tones, Britt leaning over across the table and Rose was still looking down at her plates but I could see her lips moving, she was responding to Britt. A surge of jealousy went through me; Rose hadn't spoken to me yet, only gave me a few looks and a loose hug…

The jealousy is so juvenile, I should just be happy she's alive, not jealous she's contributing to some regular girl. I looked away, not being able to look at it anymore, I'll love to blame this on my pregnancy hormones, and maybe I still could.

"Calm down, Lissa." Adrian whispered coming towards me, discreetly so no one would notice. "The ugly green monster is popping out." I rolled my eyes.

"I'm fine, Adrian." I said, stubbornly. The attempt to get Adrian to back off was half-heartily; he was a spirit user and could see through one like a window. Auras, dastardly things. "Nothing's wrong."

"Convincing me, or you?" He asked. I glared at him; he shrugged to prove his indifference. "I can imagine how you feel, Lissa. It's hard not to feel bitter about what happened."

"Are you just gonna repeat your 'inspirational' speech from yesterday?" I asked, not in the mood to hear Adrian 'lift a crowd' again.

"No," He said with a frown, then it turned into a cocky smile a moment later. "But it was good wasn't it? I should go into politics." I wanted to remind him that he's royal, so by birthright he's into politics. However, the action would be futile. I rolled my eyes.

"I was about to suggest when this thing blows over you and Rose can heal with an endless shopping spree. That's what you girl's do right?" He asked, completely clues. In other words – a total guy. No matter how many women he sleeps with, he'll never understand women.

"That'll only create an illusion of being 'normal' whatever that means," I said and crossed my arms and looked back to catch a glance at the girl's at the table, still talking. "It'll only fix her wardrobe crisis."

"One crisis at a time, I say." Adrian said and walked away, over to Christian and Dimitri who ever having their own conversation in the corner of the room.

The brief talk with Adrian got me thinking, how to actually start to heal the friendship between Rose and I. I can't pretend that nothing was badly damaged in the three years, and her actual act of suicide. But even trying to mend our relationship seems selfish, it's something I want. Rose might not even want a friend at the moment. Britt popped into my mind, maybe that's not entirely true.

I can't weave this web to surround me, it's not about me! Hell, it's not even about us. It's about Rose and only Rose, all the extra can be dealt when we heal Rose.

I push my bitter, selfish thoughts into the deepest parts of my mind – hoping they'll stay there.

Britt left about an hour later, her face revealing nothing about the conversation with Rose. It wasn't private, but it wasn't public either. The talk consisted of whispers between the two, and I wasn't nosy enough to go over to their table and demand to know what they were talking about. I doubted that'll give me answers, maybe a few glares and not-so-nice words. Rose was still at the table, her plate empty. _At least she's still eating…_

Everyone stopped talking when Britt left, as if it's expected that Rose will suddenly give us the four-one-one on the situation, if there is even a situation. Rose sat up straight, her eyes locked on mine. Those brown eyes that I remember during every step through childhood, had a look that I recognized, a looked of protection.

_There's the girl I know. _

She gives me a ghost of a smile before getting up and walking up the stairs, seconds later we hear the bedroom door close, keeping all her secrets behind it. The three of us (and the guardians ) that remain the room are left floundering after the events of this morning and still the backlash of last night (or last norming and now night, as of our vampire schedule.)

The night passes, Rose never coming out. I've been through all my house wife chores, which consisted of feeding Andre, dusting invisible specks, adjusting picture frames and all that jazz. Pretty uneventful, I wasn't allowed to leave the apartment, all Queenly duties were done via-video cam and faxing information off. Late at night, when the sun rose and it was time to pull back the curtains, Rose came trotting down the steps.

She looked surprisingly awake and ready for anything; she zoomed in on me, who was cuddled up to Christian.

"Move, Sparky." She commanded and Christian didn't even think twice before getting up and moving around. My eyes widened as she sat next to me, she didn't make eye contact or any sort, just stared at her feet, as if trying to collect her words.

"You obviously know of the rebels." Rose said, so low I barely heard her. "I know there plans and since I've been…unavailable for the past three years, I'm going to help you get rid of them."

She then looked up to me, her face void of any emotions, just like a guardian.

"If only you'll let me."

**A/N – Sorry for the short chapter, I finished this today I had a bit of a writer's block. **


	23. Chapter 23

**Rose's P.O.V**

My heart speed at the thought of Lissa rejecting. In my own sick personal way this was a peace offering. How Lissa thought of this, well that's up in the air. I try to make eye contact, by Lissa looking at me; it was pretty easy but for some reason my eyes wanted to wander elsewhere. Like Lissa bunny slippers, the floor and the small barely noticeable crack in the wall.

"I'll love for you to." Lissa voice said, breaking me out of my trance. For the first time my eyes drift to Lissa's green ones. Her voice sounded so sure, strong and confident. No sign of her flaking out, or saying this to simply spare my oh-so-fragile feelings. I believed her – for the time being.

I didn't speak, and neither did Lissa. A smile was on her face, one that went to her eyes and showed off her white teeth, fangs included. My face was void of emotion, inside it was conflicting but somewhat happy. Lissa's happy, so that's all that matters. I give her a small smile, one that's half-genuine and half-forced.

I get up and start to walk to the door; my stay at Lissa's ending. I needed my own peace, even for one night.

"Where you going?" Lissa's prim voice asked. "You're not going out are you, the rebels are out there." She warns.

"The rebels had their fight, and lost. They're in hiding currently; they won't make their move till this thing blows over." I was sure of that, plus their probably still reeling over what happened with Cat and her fat ass mouth. Lissa still seems 100 percent against me even taking on step out her door, even into a hallway of guardians. But she knows that she doesn't control me, and can't make me stop. She succumbs to the challenge she was obviously gonna lose, but being the Queen she is, she makes alternative endings, one not waging in my favor.

"Go with a guardian." She said, firmly. "Better yet, go with Dimitri." She waves Dimitri over who was next to Christian and Adrian, who I forgot we even in the room. I was ready to protest, but putting up a childish fit because I'm having an escort wouldn't help my case. Lissa already thinks I'm too fragile. In her head, she's taking care of three kids instead of just her son and the baby in her belly.

Dimitri's at my side in a matter of seconds. His presence giving me chills, the closeness doesn't help my raging and ready hormones.

"When will you be back?" Lissa asked, sounding very motherly. I would shrug my shoulders and tell her not to worry, but I decided to be – at the moment at least – easy to deal with.

"Morning." I said pulled up my hoodie up and walked out the door, Dimitri on my tail. The guardians looked at us suspiciously but did nothing but give us odd looks. When getting to the elevator, I expected something from Dimitri but all I got was silence, didn't know if I should have been happy or sad.

Luck must have been on my side, the lobby of the palace didn't have many people in, easier to go around unnoticed. It took us a while to get out of court and to my apartment. I had an inter battle, should I stick to the shadows and risk being seen as shifty or should I be in plain sight, not drawing attention to another by-stander. Dimitri, as if he could read my mind, made a compromise, sticking to the less crowded parts of court, while looking like a regular couple. Everyone knew Dimitri so no one paid attention to the hooded girl next to him.

We took Dimitri's car, since I had yet to obtain one. Even in the car it was nothing but silence, Dimitri didn't even turn on his stupid country music. I can't believe I miss it, it'll be a positive sign that maybe things can go the way they were for me and Dimitri.

Same time, I love him so much, even after all this. I know he loves me to, he told me millions of times before. Key word – before. I give a quick glance at him; he's stiff as a board next to me.

"Where's your apartment?" He asked, not sparing me a glance. Shocked, but still functional I tell him the address. His voice was emotionless, not a very good sign. I was taken back to the times when we were student/teacher, how one action from Dimitri can make me seem like a small child. Of course, now I know I somehow deserve it. Some small, very minuscule, part of me thought by Lissa's reaction, everyone can forget I did the unforgettable and everything's forgiven. A tad optimistic, maybe even naive.

When we pulled up to my apartment, Dimitri analyzed it and left the car to secure the premises. I wanted to protest that I've never encountered a strigoi attack here, but I kept my mouth shut. For all I know this place is infested, since it is near the Moroi Royal Court. He came back five minutes later. I was a little surprised that he gave me such trust, trusting me not to run away when he was guarding. I would be flattered if I wasn't so insulted.

Once he deemed it clear we both went inside. Once in my apartment, Dimitri did a quick look around. His face was emotionless, he probably made the conclusion that I've been up and running for a while, making him just a little pissed. If not more.

I walk and flop on the couch, trying to act nonchalant about this. "So you can go home now, right?" I asked, hopeful he'll be strangled by the awkwardness and leave. I couldn't be so near him right now, he's the only person I hurt more than Lissa. His brown eyes look in mine, the sudden eye contact and I wasn't so sure he'll be the one strangled by the eye contact.

"You want me to leave?" He asked sitting on the other side of the couch. He taps his fingers against the couch and looks over at me. "Well, are you gonna answer?" He said his voice calm with an underline of angriness. I fiddled with a piece of lose fabric on my jacket, my silence being his answer. I was being slightly childish and even more of a coward. I should be screaming for forgiveness, ask him to somehow not look at me any differently, that I'm still his same old Roza. When he first discovered me he was nothing but happiness and confusion. Now he seems a little bitter and even more confused.

I studied his face, which was currently glaring at a mug on the coffee table. His sharp nose, strong jaw that was currently tightened, his hands folded into fist. The mask slipped and I saw his real emotions. He was livid, and because of me.

"I'm sorry." I whispered. It was the only two words I was capable of saying to him, any other words were too deep or too shallow. 'I'm sorry' is simple and those two words sum it up perfectly. He looked at me, at first saying nothing, then gave me a small smile. Not one that said he was happy, or even content with my apology, it was full of bitterness.

"Sorry?" He repeats, the word sounded so wrong coming from his lips. "Sorry…what for my love?" He asked. Was he playing with me? Obviously not seeing this being worthy enough of his forgiveness, I know it wasn't but did he have to make fun of it?

"Do you really want to say it?" I said through gritted teeth. Out of all the outcomes, this is the least expected.

"Yes." He didn't hesitate in the answer. I glare at him, trying to swallow back the tears. I know what he was making me do – confront reality. By making me say it, scream it, it would be as if I releasing a barrier, breaking a dam and having water drown us both.

"For…" I started, swallowing the lump in my throat. "For…for…uhm…"

"Dammit, say it Roza!" He yelled causing me to flinch. "Say it." This time the waterworks couldn't be held back, tears flowed freely down my face and my body shook with my self-pity. Dimitri got up and stood in front of me.

"How you feel now, times that by a thousand. That's how I felt when you left me." He said. By looking at me, pathetic and crying his face softened. "I'm sorry for yelling, but Rose…what you did…it's…unacceptable, and in many ways, unforgivable." His voice was calm this time, the way he said it reminded me of the days back at the Academy; it was like he was giving me another Zen lesson. This one more important than the rest. A little late, I might add.

"But love is all about forgiving." He said running his fingers through his hair, he looked over at me. "I'm willing to try, if you want."

I'm frozen on spot, I want to say yes, inside that's all my screaming but my voice is mute.

"Don't worry; you can give me an answer tomorrow." He said and this time, gives me a real smile, or at least half of one. "We don't have to rush into anything Roza; if you want I'd be perfectly happy just being…friends." I knew very well that that was a damn lie, but the thought is nice.

"Thank you." I said, not meeting his eyes, slightly embarrassed from my breakdown. He just grunted in response.

"I'll leave; you need to get your rest." Dimitri said, like in old times looking out for me. I met his eyes and saw a sea of conflicting emotions, warmth, love and thoughtfulness, the darker side was bitterness and anger just below the surface.

"You could always stay." I said getting up, my voice surprisingly sounded stronger than I felt. I walked towards him, by now he was at the door with his hand on the knob. He gives me a sideway glance. He turns fully towards me, standing closer and making me feel like I'm only two feet tall. In hindsight Dimitri's tall 6'7 frame could make anyone feel small. "Just for tonight, only tonight."

Minutes later we were in my bedroom. I stripped to my underwear and bra and threw on a large tee-shirt I bought. I let my hair run loose, just like Dimitri likes. Dimitri stripped to his underwear and went on the bed and I joined him. In this moment I wanted nothing more than to kiss him but restrained myself. I cuddled into his warm chest and his arms wrapped around me.

Nothing would happen tonight.

But hopefully I'll have many more nights to come.

**A/N – Super, super sorry! I was so late on this and I'm sorry readers, also sorry for the action less scenes. I wanted to put them in since it wouldn't be some for a while, next chapter the adventure starts and the gang will be determined to find answers. **

**Remember to Review. **


	24. Chapter 24

**Rose's P.O.V **

He looked good doing anything.

Whether it be fighting in battle, working out or maybe even love making and he defiantly looked good doing my favorite craft – cooking. Okay, maybe eating was the favorite but since I can't cook I'm glad I have someone to, even if for a little while.

He was currently cooking bacon, grease was in the pan and the sound was loud enough to wake me. The smell was divine and made my mouth water and stomach grumble. He must have heard because he turned around, his brown eyes locking with mine. "Hungry, Rose?" He asked and I nod, coming more into his view. I noticed how he was in different clothes and when he came.

"Did you leave?" I asked.

He nods. "Just for a little while, needed to get refreshed." I sit down on one of the stools as he puts a plate in front of me. Three strips of crispy bacon, three blueberry pancakes and sunny side up eggs.

"Sorry if it tastes odd, I'm not used to making American cuisine." He apologizes and takes a plate for himself. He sits next to me and we both keep silent as we eat. It was awkward yet comfortable, something that wasn't to foreign to Dimitri and I's relationship. With that thought, it still didn't mean that I like it. Once down I take our plates and wash them out.

"How'd you afford this apartment?" Dimitri asked, standing next to me while I wash our plates. The question wasn't very surprising, I suspected someone would have asked sooner or later – my hope was later.

"I sold my coffin." I told him, being straight forward and tried to act nonchalant by causally drying the dishes and not looking Dimitri in the eye. When I finish I turn to Dimitri, his gaze towards the floor. Feeling the awkwardness creeping up on me again I decide to excuse myself to get ready for the day.

Taking a shower and getting dress. I wore simply jeans, sneakers and a white shirt along with my jacket. I tie my hair up in a messy bun and walk back into the living room. "Are we going to Lissa's or do you plan on staying here all day?" I asked.

"Lissa's, we have a lot to discuss and she can't leave her apartment." He said. I nodded, but knowing 'Lots to discuss' means my suicide. I was positive they might dance over the subject, to spare my feelings. Especially Lissa. "She's called me several times since four this afternoon, asking how you were doing and things like that. She wanted us to come to her place the moment you woke up." He explains.

"Well we should get going then."

At Lissa's, surprisingly everyone was up and anyone who could drink coffee had it in their hands. Except Adrian, who even more surprisingly, looked sober. Even Eddie was here who had a big smile on his face as he talked to Lissa, who seemed equally as happy.

"Hey, Rose." Lissa said when we walked in and engulfed me in a hug. It would have been easier if her large stomach wasn't in the way. I awkwardly put my arms around her back and return it.

"I think your baby doesn't like me." I said pulling away, I felt little thumps on my stomach which mean Lissa's little firecracker is kicking up a storm in her. Lissa laughs and rubs her stomach.

"No, no, she likes you. It's just she had a very active morning, isn't that right baby girl?" Lissa asked her belly while rubbing it affectionately.

"No, he's a boy – not a girl." Christian spoke up.

"I thought you didn't know the gender yet." Adrian spoke up.

"We don't." Lissa said, as she was about to say something else but Christian cut her off.

"Yes, we don't so Lissa stop confusing our son by calling him a girl." I smile and roll my eyes at their playful yet serious banter. They seemed exactly like the couple I imagined how they would be when they grew older. Playfully arguing over something simple like their unborn child's gender.

"Let's have a bet," I said walking up to them. They both stopped their 'arguing' to listen. "Christian thinks it a boy and Lissa girl, let's put money on this." I purposed, their curious eyes looked my way and Adrian was the first to break the silence.

"I'm on Lissa's team; I believe it's a girl so I put…sixty bucks on it." Adrian said and took out his wallet and threw three twenties on the table. Apparently Adrian stayed the same, throwing his riches around like it's nothing. Even though that kind of annoyed me, I was happy to know not everything was different. So the old trait was very much welcomed.

"I put twenty on boy." Christian said. Lissa countered his by putting twenty on a girl.

"Fifty on girl." I said and tossed my money on the table with the growing pile. I really didn't care what gender it was, just wanted to be on Lissa's side maybe having faith in her would be the first step to getting what we once had.

"I'm the only one who thinks it's a boy?" Asked Christian.

"I'm with you, Christian." Dimitri said and put fifty dollars in the pile.

"Your gonna lose Christian, a mother knows her own baby." Lissa said going to the couch to sit down.

"According to biology, the male actually determines the baby's gender so I think I'll know." He said. They once again engaged into a fight about it, they seemed never ending. I turned to Dimitri who was actually texting, it surprised me since I didn't think he even knew how to text.

"Who are you texting?" I asked.

"Viktoria." He answered putting his phone back in his pocket. When seeing my confused expression he gave more detail. "The brunette next door," He said and continued. "My sister." Oh.

"She's in college and wanted to see what I was up to." The way he talked of his sister reminded me of my mother. My friends know that I'm alive, but what about my mother? How did she even take my death, was she sad or did she even care? We made a small break through with the Spokane incident but I would barely call our relationship close.

"She was a temporary guardian for Jessie, you remember him?" I nod with a tight smile.

"How could I forget?"

"We should get to business." Lissa announced, standing up and brushing imaginary dirt off her maternity dress.

Christian scoffed and rolled his eyes. "You're only saying that because I'm right." He said. Christian was sprawled across the couch, a small rubber ball in his hands, tossing it in the air and catching it. Lissa snatch's it when it goes up in the air and throws it at him.

"Whatever." She said and turned serious and looked over at us. "Since I couldn't sleep last night I decided to put my busy brain to work. I looked over most things dealing with the rebels. It would be better use if I had any names." She said looked over to me at the last part. I didn't give her names because I didn't have time.

"I only knew a few names," I said and gave off the names of the people I knew in the rebels. "I don't know many last names. Oh, and Cat was one of Mia's old friends so if you want to know more of her, then ask Mia." I said. Like many others, I didn't want to see Mia yet. Again, I don't know how she reacted, I guess sad like the others because we left off at the good place, unlike when we met.

Lissa was enthusiastically writing down the names in a small note pad that was lying on the coffee table, using her belly as a desk. "Anything else?" I tell her where they're headquarters were, even though I doubt it'll be of much use. They probably packed everything away. Even with that information, Lissa still insisted that some guardians check it out. If the rebels left any information of their whereabouts.

"Christian, can you go tell my assistant to get Hans; I need to send guardians to the rebels quarters, now." She said and Christian pulled out his cellphone to call her assistant.

"You said that this Jeremy person was the leader, but wasn't the _leader_?" Asked Lissa as she bit the end of her pencil, her green eyes deep in thought. "If this is the case, that means there are probably more groups around, or at least one. They could have fled to their leader, regrouping."

"Probably gonna get a shit load for messing up, too." I said.

"Hey, do you guys think this has anything to do with the suicides?" Lissa asked, her eyes grew wide and she bit her lip and looked over to me and quickly looked away. Now the awkward part comes in, they can't say the 'S' word without feeling extremely guilty.

"What suicides?" I asked, pretending that it didn't bother me.

It took several seconds before they snapped out of their hazes. "Oh, uhm, there were some suicides between a few shadowkissed along with an increased number of Spirit users checking into mental asylums." Lissa answered. "Also to point out that these spirit users all have lost a bond mate to suicide."

"You think this has to do with the Rebels?" I asked her. She shrugs.

"It might. That's the thing about suicide; they don't really look into it as a murder." Dimitri said as his eyes met mine. I knew where this was going, and I didn't like it.

"But we can't ask what happened with those shadowkissed, because they're dead." Lissa said looked at me with hopeful eyes. "But now we have you, and –"

"No." I said. My voice was hard and unwavering, I would not – could not, think of the darkest time in my life, even if it was only for a short while. Reflection would be torture. "No." I repeat, this time my voice softer.

Lissa looked persistent. "Rose, it's important that we know so we can –"

"I don't care, Liss." I shouted, which caused her to flinch. "I'm not..." I trailed off. Lissa crossed her arms and started to pace.

"I thought you wanted to help us." She said between gritted teeth, anger and irritation radiating off her.

Ready to defend myself, I wanted to help. Least I could do. "I do but –" She waved her hand, cutting me off.

"No, you don't. Because all the rest of us have to put our emotions elsewhere, and you –"

"And I what?" I asked, standing in front of her. She simply glared at me, which I returned.

"And you can go around pretending nothing happened." She finished.

"Is that how you feel?" I asked. She looked down for a moment, and then back at me, her eyes portrayed nothing.

"Among other things."

**A/N – I know, I'm late again. School's starting next week so I can't say that's gonna get easier…**


	25. Chapter 25

**Rose's P.O.V**

Her words hung in the air, the angry look in her usually calm eyes were maddening. I didn't know what I should do – apologize? Spit out a nasty retort? Both won't really help us. So I simply back away, giving Lissa one last glare before sitting on the stool. Lissa didn't say anything else, only sat on the couch, looked down at her fingers and twiddled with her thumbs.

Her nervousness lasted for merely a second, when then we heard knocking on the other side of the front door. Lissa shoots up immediately, straightens her skirt before answering. A tall moroi woman, wearing a grey business suit with her dark hair in a tight bun on top of her head and a phone in her palm.

"Come in, Gabriella." Lissa said. "Did you get Hans to send guardians to the rebel's quarters?" Asked Lissa. Gabriella stiffly nodded.

"Yes, he's loading the cars with guardians now. He's requesting you spare of few of yours, for we are short of guardians due to your large number." Gabriella said while checking back with her phone, her fingers pressing the numbers swiftly.

"I don't mind, take as many as you'll like. Keep them if you wish, I have too many. I can easily go on ten guardians." Lissa said and flopped back down on the couch, her eyes avoiding me. "These guardians are needed elsewhere. I request that you lower the number. I'm queen; I should at least have the right to that."

"As you wish," Gabriella said. "Which guardians will you send?" Lissa's face turns in thought.

"Choose me." I said speaking up. Gabriella turns to me, as if noticing that I was in the room for the first time. She does not show any judgment towards me, like another moroi would, she just assesses me before turning back to Lissa, who surprisingly green eyes are trained on me. Times like this I wish we still had the bond; I've must have lost it when I died. I briefly wonder if I still have the effects of being Shadowkissed, I have no more time to wonder on it when Gabriella speaks.

"Who is this?" She asked.

Lissa pauses before answering, probably calculating the answer. "An old friend." She answers. "She's a guardian; she graduated with the Novices of St. Vladimir three years ago." Lissa said lying effortlessly.

Gabriella looks at me again. "Who's your charge?" She asked. I shuffle my feet nervously, but I look at her again, determined not to look weak.

"No charge." I said. Her face showed no emotion, she only nodded before turning back to Lissa.

"She'll have to do. I'll pick the guardians; you seem to have more on your plate." That was all she said before she left the door, in her crisp professional air following.

"Now they're letting you let go of your guardians." Said Christian. "That was almost too easy." Apparently Christian didn't change, he's still suspicious of everyone that has a say in Lissa's safety. More so now that she's pregnant and the mother of his child. Lissa and I's 'argument' got buried under. We both knew it'll surface once more. I momentarily ponder on the thought that Lissa blames herself for my death.

"Maybe so, but you know Gabriella, I've been hassling her about this for months." Lissa said. "This may be better, so many guardians in one place. It's easy to lose control or get confused. Unless they come at me with bazooka's and tanks, I'm perfectly safe." Lissa argued gently.

She looked at me. "We need to talk, before you leave." She said. I was surprised she announced that in front of everybody. But nevertheless I conceded and we walked together to her bedroom, as we passed I heard their baby wailing in his room. Lissa goes into his nursery. I follow her and look around the room, it's obvious Lissa designed it but it still had a boyish flare. She coo's at the baby, trying to silence him and eventually brings him to their bedroom. I follow.

I close the door behind us. I'm a little paranoid that someone will overhear us, though I know I took all the bugs out of this room when I was holed up here. Lissa sits on the bed, putting the small child between the pillows.

"I can't say I'm surprised that you're having your children so close together." I said, still standing at the door. Lissa doesn't look up.

"It wasn't planned, you know." She responds after several seconds later. "Andre was this one wasn't. We planned on another baby when he reached three and other children every two years in between till we reached six. We need lots of babies to carry on the Dragomir line. Plus Andre is gonna be two in one month, so I'm just one year short." I sit on the bed, next to the baby and pick at the small loose threads on bed spread.

"I'm sorry I flipped on you." She said. "I wanna say it's the hormones or the stress but truthfully it was all me. For that I'm sorry." She said, getting everything out in the open.

"You have some unaired grievances, Liss. Tell me now so we can get it over with." I said my tone wasn't mean or anything it was simply the way it is.

"Fine, you want to hear it all, here it is." She said. "I hate what you did; it was selfish, reckless and plain old stupid. I hate myself for hating that, because you sacrificed yourself for me, time and time again and yet I hate you for doing something for yourself. Even if it is suicide. I hate that you didn't talk to me, say anything. Rose I might not show it all times but I love you, so much! You're like the sister I always wanted and it broke my heart knowing that you couldn't come to me, or talk things out. Was I really that unapproachable?" She asked, tears in her pale green eyes. Guilt racks through me and I couldn't look her in the eyes.

"Liss, that wasn't the case." I said my voice low. "I couldn't be around you because, I was so…weak. I was only a weeks away from being a guardian. I couldn't let you see me so fragile. I guess I was insecure, now I know I was just over-reacting." I said. Lissa came by me and held me by my shoulders.

"You must always remember you're my best friend before you're my guardian. Always." She said and pulled me into a tight hug, or as tight as she could manage.

"I'm so sorry." I said through my tears as I gripped onto her shirt. She said the same as her tears soaked my shirt.

After a few moments later we both let go of each other and wipe our eyes. "I'm also sorry for leaking so much darkness in you. I didn't even notice, I didn't mean to." She said.

"No, it's my fault. You didn't give it to me, I took it. A lot, I couldn't control it at times." I told her. She gives me a funny look.

"Really? Has that happened before?" I shake my head.

"No, it doesn't matter now since we don't have the bond anymore." She nods and looks back at Andre who is trying to steady himself on the bed. She sets him down before he could fall.

"I guess. When you holed yourself in your room I was mainly afraid that you weren't eating, not stealing darkness. I even limited magic while you were depressed." She said.

"I didn't notice." I said, talking about the darkness. "Even though this doesn't change much, I did eat or at least a little bit. Camille was being strangely nice and left chips and chocolate at my door every day."

Lissa's eyes go wide. "Camille, Camille super royal bitch Conta?" I laugh and nod.

"That's the one." I said.

"Wow, can't believe she decided to do something nice." Lissa said, in shock.

"Can't believe she knew what nice was." I said which caused both of us to laugh. This causes us to launch into crazy stories of how bitchy all the royals were. If I closed my eyes, I could even imagine being back in St. Vladimir's, in my dorm and it just being the two of us – like before.

()

The Rebels beaten down shack was even more broken then before. The saggy walls, some still in the same condition, others torn down all together, which caused some part of the ceiling to come down as well. The only thing cheerful was the sunlight the cracked walls and ceiling let in. It gave it a look that made it seem as it was more of a ruin, than an abandoned building.

I could still make out the meeting room; the table was broken in two, the chairs thrown carelessly across the small room, some chairs outside and in other rooms. I even recognized the chair I was tied to.

"They stripped this bare." Eddie said. He was one of the guardians who were taken on the trip. He also couldn't keep his eyes off me, not in any romantic way but in the I-can't-believe it way. Now that things were soothe over with me and Lissa, I felt much more at peace.

"No, more like tossed everything around. Bare would be less messy." I said to him. A few guardians took a few pictures of things around, but there wasn't much to take pictures of. The place didn't have the freshest smell either.

He smiles over to me, and it has nothing to do with the Rebels quarters. He's still on the 'Rose's back' high. "I guess, we should look in those closets, maybe we can find clothes items, do a few D.N.A test and find someone."

"I already told Lissa everyone I knew and Mia knows one of them." I tell him while going to a wardrobe. They had a few bedrooms here, most stacked with beds so more than around ten people each room. There was a bedroom right behind it, which was the one Eddie was in. Due to poor management the wall was down and I could see Eddie in the cracked mirror. "Do you still talk to Mia?" I asked.

"Never really talked to her in the first place." He calls back. "That was Mason's job." Mason's name stabs me in the heart, even after three years or so, his death was still sore to me. "But I see her around every now and again. We talked about a week or so ago. Got some coffee at a one of the Court's café."

"Oh, was that a date?" I asked wiggling my eyebrows. He shakes his head while going through some of the shelf's on the walls of the room.

"We're just friends; I don't see her like that." He said.

"Is there someone else?" I asked when I went through the empty wardrobe. When all I got was silence I knew the answer.

"There is someone else!" I said with excitement. I look back to see a faint blush on Eddie's face. I smile and look back at the wardrobe.

"I don't see anything here." Eddie said, maybe trying to take a subtle change of conversation.

"Me either." Right after the words left my lips, a guardian shouts out from the basement.

"I found something!" He yells. Eddie and I look at each other before darting out the door and down the wobbly steps. A few more guardians were around us, they sent around twenty to come here. Once we got to the last step, the moldy smell of the basement hit me full force.

I wrinkle my nose; the smell was mold and…blood I believe. "What died down here?" I asked no one in particular. Eddie looked around the room and his eyes widened at something in the room. I heard a few guardians gasp. I wiggle my way through them, it coming into view.

One the wall, in red were the words 'We'll kill you, just like last time' closer examination I seen that it was blood. Another tell-tell sigh was the dead body just below the letters. Her hair sticky with blood and half her brain blown to bits around the wall along with what looked like stab wounds on her chest and her stomach.

The body's was Cat's.

**A/N – I love it when I get to the point of a story where I knew where I'm going and how to get there, this is that moment for this story. Yah! Remember to Review!**


	26. Chapter 26

**Major lemon up ahead! Don't worry; I have it marked so you can skip it if you wish. **

**Rose's P.O.V**

"Isn't this a good thing?" Adrian asked, looking at all of us confused. "One less person trying to kill us, right?" Lissa shoots a glare at him from across the table and throws a brown banana at his head, which he gracefully dodges.

"Depends how you look at it, Adrian." I said my voice soft and tired. It's been a tiresome day; the events here today will revisit themselves in my nightmares. I rub my eyes and yawn, craving a nice nap. I won't sleep tonight, though. No, I have work to do, mainly try to connect the dots. It isn't so hard to put together, but denial…well that's a little bitch and it's clouding my reasonable thought. Admitting it is the first step.

I'd love to pen my actions on someone else, I really would. But it would be beyond crushing if I later found out there was no one else, and it was just me along. That's what the Rebels try to do, get inside my head to screw me over so I can falter and they can come and take Lissa. I can't think back on past events, no I should just push that in the dark corner of my mind. I need to focus on the present and future.

Everyone knows what happened in that basement. The Guardians gave Lissa all the details, not sparing anything. When I heard them telling her, I snuck a few peaks at her face. It slightly amused me. Since when did Lissa know how to bottle up her emotions? She was always the one who bottled it up and spit it out moments later. I on the other hand said what needed to be said at that moment. I was expecting her to pull me aside again, but she never does and it's been a few hours since we've been back.

Perhaps she can see how exhausted I am and is sparing me the long talk. She'll wait till tomorrow, I know it. But again she seems to be switching things up quite a lot recently. I barely know this Lissa anymore. She has changed, I know that. Maybe it's me, I'm the one who hasn't grown and matured. I just stayed a teenager forever only difference is that I'm sadder. I look over at Dimitri, who seems to be deep in thought once again.

His hair was in his small pony tail once again, a few strands leaking into his concentrated face. His eyes glued to the ground and his chin resting in his hand. Almost as if he feels my eyes on him, those dark orbs look over to me. I quickly advert my eyes to something on the table. But I could feel his eyes still on me, just knowing that makes my heart beat a million times a minute.

"I know were all kind of tired, so I suggest we head off to bed." Lissa proposes which is met with nods all around. "I'll look at this some more tonight, but besides that we can meet up again at night." She said she grabbed Christian's hand and they both walked to their bedroom, whispering things to each other.

A few moments later Adrian spoke up. "I'm going to the bar; it's the ultimate stress reliever." He gets up and before he passes me, ruffles my hair before walking out the door. Leaving Dimitri and I. For a moment it's just silence, both of us deep in thought. I was thinking of him, and who knows what's on Dimitri's mind. I sigh and look down at the table, drawing invisible patterns with my finger.

"I think you shouldn't go to your apartment tonight." Dimitri's voice sliced through the silence and I turn to him, confused.

"Why?" I asked. "I doubt they know where I live."

"It's not time for doubt; it's a matter of life and death now." He said walking towards me and leaning on the table, arms crossed and looking down at me. "They already seem to know a lot about you." I flinched; I knew where he was going with this. He wasn't at the warehouse, but he got filled in just as much as Lissa. He knew what was written on the walls; maybe he even saw some pictures they took. I prayed we won't bring it up.

"Where do you suggest I stay?" I asked, getting back on topic. Dimitri looks hesitant for a minute before he says anything.

"You can always come to my place. It's temporary since my charge will be going back to Russia in a few more weeks but you're welcome to stay till then." He's going to Russia? I thought he was staying here permanently. I couldn't really fathom Dimitri being half-way across the world, away from me. Maybe Lissa can fix this, but then again it would be selfish to just take away that. For all I know he loves being the guardian of his charge.

"Fine." I agreed. We both left Lissa's house, passing all the blank-faced guardians. Once outside I soaked in the sun. It early sunrise and the sky was orange with the dark clouds on the other side, the light about to consume the night. The court was quiet, with guardians patrolling about. All alert because of the recent attacks on their queen. I could tell they enjoyed it, however. The sun was a privilege we rarely ever experienced. I was also in a grave for three years so I took all I could get.

Dimitri's hand go to my lower back, guiding me to his place. I could still feel the heat of his hand through the thin fabric. If anyone noticed us, or cared they would probably assume we're a couple. Something I wished were true but long distanced relationships rarely very work out. He did propose that we could have something yesterday, is that deal still up?

We arrived at the guardian's housing. Something mainly used for court guardians who didn't stay with their charges. I'm guessing Dimitri's an exception. The people in the lobby simply wave at Dimitri and cast me odd looks. One guardian comes up to us.

"Dimitri, can I speak to you for a moment?" He asked. He was a fairly handsome man but paled in comparison to Dimitri, like everyone else. Dimitri goes with him and I stay a respectable distance away they talk for a little while longer before Dimitri comes back to me.

"What did he want?" I asked, not caring if I seemed nosey.

Dimitri led me away till we came to his door. "He wanted to know what I was doing with such a beautiful girl at this hour." He said while pulling his eyes out and unlocking the door. He flipped on the lights and everything became clear. Inside it was cozy, but not very small. I knew the layout of the apartment, once being here when I snuck up on Dimitri. I'm guessing I'll take Viktoria's room now that she's back in college.

"He thought we were gonna sleep together?" I asked standing in the middle of room and looked back at him.

"In so many words, yeah that was what he was implying." Dimitri explains as he shrugged his jacket off onto the leather couch. I examine it before turning to Dimitri.

"What happened to your duster?" I asked him, picking up the regular jacket. I remember teasing him about that worn out duster. It made him look like some sexy cowboy. "Did you finally burn it?" He cracks me a small smile, but a haunted look in the back of his eyes.

"It's just hanging up in my closet; I don't really wear it anymore." He said, keeping emotion out of his voice. I slightly frown, knowing why he wouldn't wear it. It reminds me of us.

"I'm going to take a shower, there's food in the fridge and extra blankets in the closet. Sleep wherever you want." He said while he was heading out to his room. I look after his retreating figure before a thoughts pops into my head. I throw a spiteful look at the jacket and walk into Dimitri's room, already hearing the shower running.

The door was cracked open and I could see Dimitri's closed scattered around floor, and the silhouette of his naked body behind the shower wall. I bite my lip before going to his closet.

Most of Dimitri's clothes were dark, greys, black and other dark colors. Everything was plain, not really attention drawing, but that was the guardian's lifestyle, to be a shadow. I shuffled through his clothes till I found the horrible piece of clothing. Dimitri's duster. Now, I believe we have some sort of truce.

I take one more peak of the bathroom door before stripping every off. I stuff my clothes under his bed and walk over to his mirror. I can't say I was entirely happy with my figure; I still didn't have my golden tan or my amazing shape back. I wonder if Dimitri will still like me, even if my body isn't perfect. I slide his duster on but freeze when I hear the shower turn off. Insecurity and anxiousness run through me. I quickly flicker his lights off and go to his bed.

Dimitri steps out of the bathroom; from the faint light coming from the bathroom I can tell he's still naked. I saw every inch of him before, and while I was rotting he just got even better. He was slightly more buff but not meat head buff. He dries his hair with a small towel before throwing it in the hamper. He walks over to the bed, still not noticing me. If he was fully alert he would have seen me the moment he came out. Once he gets near the bed he spots me.

**-M Scene-**

"Rose?" He asked and quickly snatches a pillow from the bed and covers himself, as best as he could.

"It's nothing I haven't seen before Comrade." I said and crawled to the edge of the bed and gently remove the pillow, covering my prize. "In case you forgot, we've been through this before. Twice actually, remember?" I asked. He nods and I could see his cock getting hard. I give him a wicked smile before leaning down to and brush my lips against his length. He shakes a little and I smile, getting the desired effect and I've barely touched him.

I move my lips to the head of his cock; I gently engulf it between my lips, moving my lips gently over the slit, back and forth. He shutters and grabs onto my hair, more of leverage than to guide me. He knows I know what I'm doing. I slowly take more of his length into my mouth. Dimitri moans and grips onto my hair harder, twisting strands around his fingers. "Fuck." He grunts.

Once he was situated in my mouth I start to tighten my mouth around him. I quickly get to work and move my mouth up and down his length. Rushing my pace with every second, I could feel him throb inside me and I could taste the pre-cum in the back of my throat. Dimitri released a few more words in Russian before I feel him tightened and he released inside my mouth.

I let his limp cock fall from my mouth and swallowed the rest of cum. I move back and let him sit on the bed. I give him a cocky smile, no pun intended. He gives me a sideways glance. "Why'd you do that?" He questioned. I shrug nonchalantly.

"Because I wanted to." I answer. I get behind him, my legs on either side of him and my core pressed against his back. "And you recently dropped the bomb on me today that you'll be going back to Russia soon." I said and kiss his shoulder and upper back.

"So this is impulse?" He asked, holding onto my leg. "I don't just want to fuck you; I want to make love to you, Roza. Like you deserve." I smile against his back. He's so sweet; I don't deserve a man like him.

"Who says we can't do both?" I asked and maneuvered myself so I was straddling him. Looking at his face I could see he was conflicted but lust overshadows it.

"You're wearing my duster." He notices. He touches the leather fabric, examining it before moving onto my body. "It looks good on you."

"I look good in everything, Comrade." I teased. I lean in to kiss him, his lips moving in harmony with mine. He tasted like mint and slightly like coffee. Just the way I remembered. I pressed harder against him, my core rubbing around his stiffing cock. "So is this a yes?" I asked, slightly breathless. He doesn't say anything, just turns me over so we're in the middle of the bed and he was on top of me and in between my legs.

"Just relax, Roza." He said his voice husky and deep. His sexy Russian accent becoming more pronounced which only caused a flood to go through me. He spreads the duster apart, giving him a full view of my body. His hands immediately go to my breast, his large hands surrounding them. He gently squeezes and leans down to kiss my lips once again, giving me a sultry kiss before moving away from my lips, down to my chin, across my neck and finally to my breast.

He takes one nipple between his lips, slowly sucking on it. My moans soon fill the room and my fingers trail through his hair. He releases it with a pop before going to the other. I wrap my legs around his torso, rubbing my aching core against his stomach, trying to find some release from the pleasurable torture.

Dimitri senses my distress and removes my legs and puts his fingers around my core. He's teasing at first, but soon after his fingers sneak inside of me. My breath catches inside my throat. His fingers spread through my tight hole. It's been too long since the last time. He adds two more fingers, being four fingers total crammed inside me. "Go faster, don't be gentle." I moan and he goes harder and faster till I feel the coil inside me unwind. He slips his fingers out, and put his tongue down, wiping off the excess wetness. This gets me in the mood once more.

He grabs my legs and spread them further apart and without warning plunges inside me. He continues to plunge inside me and I rock my hips to meet his thrust. All around us the sound of our bodies smacking against each other. Good god, he's only gotten better at this. He was already a god in bed, now…he's off the charts. "Fuck, Roza. You're so tight, and wet around me." Just his words are able to have me hitting my high. He grunts more as he slams into me harder each time till I come undone. He shots his load into me seconds later.

**-M Scene Over- **

He lies down beside me, both of us breathing hard.

A goofy smile soon places on my lips. I can't believe I just had sex with Dimitri – again! Never thought I'd be in this situation again.

"I'll stay for you, Roza." He said, breaking the silence between us. I turn my head to look over at him. "I'll do anything for you." He wraps his arms around me and pulls me to his chest, the most peaceful place on earth. I then process his words and another smile comes up.

"You'll be with me?" I asked. "Even if I left you, all those years ago?" He merely held me tighter to him and buried himself in my hair.

"All's forgiven."

A few hours later, after meaningless chatter about futile topics, I dozed off wrapped in Dimitri's arms, on my way to what I thought was the best sleep I've ever obtain. I soon found myself in a dream. The scene materialized around me, objects came into focus as well as colors blending together.

As the time passed I got a clear vision of my dorm room at St. Vladimir's. Everything looked just like I remember. It was a complete mess, like usual. My clothes were scattered across the floor, while the closet was open and I could see most of the hangers empty. My bed wasn't made and the window was open, letting in a cool breeze.

Pain shot through my arms. I looked down to see several straight lines going across my wrist, bleeding furiously. "What?" My voice drifted away, I had to strain to hear it myself. I try to wipe the blood away, only to have more pour out.

"Remember?" A voice asked. I look around the room, but no one else is here. Slightly frightened, I go to the door. I try to pull on it, but it's locked and won't open. I go to the window and look out, only to see a big fog making it impossible to see anything. For all I know I could be hundreds of floors up.

"No escape." The voice said again. The voice was unfimilar, but the voice of a woman.

"Who are you?" I asked but my voice comes out raspy, and suddenly my throat feels dry and tight.

"Your worst nightmare." The voice replies. "I was so displeased when I got word of your return. Here I was hoping you were gone for good."

"Well I wasn't!" I scream at the voice, but talking only made my throat feel tighter. Soon enough I have a struggle to breath.

"Next time I'll do it in person." The voice said. "No tricks or treats – just blood." With that being said my oxygen cut off completely and I drop to my knees, blood surrounding me. Too much to have come from my wrist, the blood seemed to come up from the floorboards. I can't scream because soon black spots dance around my vision till it completely consumes me.

I wake up in a sweat, my body feeling too hot and sweaty, not that good kind. "Roza, you okay?" Dimitri asked, putting his hand on my shoulder. I put the blankets to my chest. I nod and brush some sweaty hair out of my face. Dimitri gives me a concerned look before circling me into his arms.

"It was just a bad dream." I whispered, mainly to myself than anyone else. It had to be the logical explanation. I can see the dream reflected off my suicide, being that my wrists were slit and I couldn't breathe, representing my hanging. Just thinking of the actual events gives me chills. I can only hope that it was a fragment of my imagination, and not something more sinister, like a spirit dream. Because if it was, it means a spirit user was behind it – something that can be deadly for Lissa and me.


	27. Chapter 27

**Disclaimer – I don't own Vampire Academy. **

**Rose's P.O.V**

I predicted it would be awkward in the morning. Last night was impulse, not regrettable, but impulsive. I'm glad it happened of course, now I have Dimitri and its official. I smiled as I finished putting on clothes. They were all scattered around Dimitri's room so it took some time.

After I finished I joined Dimitri for a cup of coffee, it was silent but perfect at the same time. We didn't need words to understand each other. By the way he looked at me; I can tell he knew something was weighing on my mind but he respected my privacy to not ask about it…yet.

Once we were done we walked hand-in-hand to the palace. Due to the fact that I still wasn't 'out of the closet' I didn't want to be risk being seen by a familiar face. I have no idea how breaking the news will go for most. Royals, like always, would be scared because we all know they hate change.

We make it to Lissa's room; the air seemed to be buzzing with excitement. The first thing I noticed was the large machine set up in their living room and a pile of money sitting not-so-neatly on the coffee table.

I also notice that a new member of the gang is here – Mia.

She looked just like I remembered her. She was gone with the doll face and stayed with looking her age. If I did my math correctly she'd be nineteen now and she looked matured. Her blond hair was straightened down to her waist and she wore a casual tee-shirt and jeans. She was talking to Eddie and both of them wore big smiles on their faces. When the door shut behind us her baby blue eyes darted over to me. If anything her smile got wider, showing off her sharp fangs.

"Rose!" She cried and what seemed like at the speed of light, her skinny arms were thrown around my neck. Her body crushed against mine as she practically tackled me. I had to take a step back to steady myself. I laughed a bit as she stepped away, her blue eyes shining with tears.

"I told myself I wouldn't cry." She cries, she sniffles in her tears and hastily wipes them away. Eddie steps up from behind her and smiled over at me.

"She's meaning to say, we're happy you're back." He said, his eyes shining with happiness.

"Glad to be back." I answered. To turn the attention away from me I asked about large machine.

"That's an ultrasound machine, Lissa's gonna find out the sex of her baby today." Eddie answers, wrapping his arms around Mia's shoulders.

"From what Adrian told me, there's some money on this." Mia said with interest.

"Yup and Mia here will solve the mystery once and for all." Lissa said joining us. "She'll be my doctor and since I can't actually leave my apartment I brought it all here." Lissa then claps her hands together and smiles widely at all of us.

"Let's get this started, shall we?"

Around ten minutes later we all found her answer. Lissa will be having another boy, much to Christian's enjoyment and the few people who betted on a girl's disappointment. I could tell Lissa was still very excited, even though the designer little girl dresses will have to be put on hold. Seeing all the excitement that surrounded this, it made me feel a bit guilty for having to put a hold on this.

And to think I could possibly ruin their lives because of some selfish act all those years ago…

Or so it seems. I defiantly need to find the answers to such a thing, whatever the outcome and answer I need to move on and I can't do that if something is holding me back, regret. I have this second chance at life and I'm gonna use it.

In the entire thrill, Lissa and Dimitri seemed to look over to me a few times casting me suspicious looks. I remained mostly quiet which wasn't very characteristic, and they've taken notice. Dimitri, since he's usually anti-social came over to me. I was relaxing at the mini bar and looking over to the group of people fawning over the ultrasound pictures.

"You seem so distracted lately." Dimitri told me, leaning against the bar. I shrugged and play with the small plastic sword that circled the rim of the glass. "Ever since this morning, is something bothering you?" He asked and he was also hinting at if it had anything to do with our 'connection' last night. Or morning.

"I'm just sad that I lost my money." I said, cracking a small and forced smile. Dimitri does the same and I can see he didn't buy into it. But the amazing thing about Dimitri is that he didn't push but I know that famous restraint will only last so long.

The tiny celebration went by rather quickly and while Adrian, Christian and Eddie were having a beer and Dimitri and Mia watching Andre I taken Lissa upstairs under the assumed topic of 'Girl Talk'. She's beaming and joyful when we go up to her room.

"I can't believe I'll be living with three boys in a few months." Lissa said flopping down on the bed. She had a big grin on her face and turned to me.

"A lot of things have been changing." I said, with a cheerful tone so she doesn't see that I have an ulterior motive. "So, uhm, have you've been practicing with spirit lately?" I asked casually, Lissa who is still in pre-baby bliss doesn't seem to notice the switch in conversation.

"No, not lately. I occasionally use it to see aura's and once Andre fell on the pavement and scraped his knee…but other than that I don't really use the magic." Lissa said and a dark cloud seemed to hang over her, the bubbly personality gone. "The consequences are too much, Rose. I lost you last time, it was a lesson well learned."

"Don't let me hold you back, Liss." I told her, it's not like we're bonded anymore anyways. "Besides Adrian, have you found any information on spirit or any other spirit users?" She gives me a curious glance and I quickly cover it.

"I just want to get all the information since it's been years." I said.

Lissa thinks it over and responded. "Only one girl, a total wacko if you ask me. She abused her magic and it eventually came to bite her in the ass. I met her shortly after you…died. She made me feel better for a little while, but of course she couldn't replace you. If she wasn't such a high royal she would have been sent to the asylums but her father managed to pull a few strings."

"Was she funny crazy or psycho crazy?" I asked with peaked interest.

"Psycho crazy." Lissa said without hesitation. "She tried to kill me, which she claimed had been a misunderstanding which Tatiana bought. Even though she hadn't been sent away, it caused great humiliation for that family."

So great that it might cause her to want revenge?

"What was her name?" I asked.

"Avery Lazar."

The name of my target.

"I can come right?" Asked Britt. I sighed and packed up the small belongings I had. A few shirts, pants and comfortable shoes. I also had a gun, stake and other weapons inside.

"You know that won't make it pass airport security right?" Britt said as she looked over into my suitcase. I close it shut and zipped it up effortlessly since it wasn't full to the brim.

"I'm driving, and no you can't come." I said to Britt. After Lissa's little get to together I made a bee-line to the library, hoping to find some info on the Lazar's. After getting nothing from that I snuck into some high security places and stole a few files and found out a few Lazar estates where Avery may be being held. She's currently my only hope – odd considering she may also want me dead.

Nothing seemed to slip pass Dimitri and he noticed my odd behavior. I told him I wanted to spend tonight with him, which is not a lie, and currently he's probably making me dinner waiting for me. The thought breaks my heart but I needed to do this alone – kill Avery (if she's the culprit) and hopefully this may break whatever fucked up gang is trying to kill Lissa.

"You may get yourself killed." Britt argued. I rolled my eyes. She may have been right, but what could she do? She's a moroi and will only slow me down.

"And you'll be there to magically save me?" I asked with much sarcasm. She huffed and crossed her arms.

"At least you won't be alone when you die!" That's her argument? I give her a weak smile and do a mental checklist of everything I have and need. My mind then drifts to Dimitri, a smile comes on my lips when I remember our night and a frown quickly comes when he finds out I left him again.

"Just tell Dimitri when the moon rises tomorrow, and then I'll be too far for him to come get me, okay? Tell him I'm fine." Even though chances are that I won't but he doesn't need to know that.

It breaks my heart that I have to leave him again, but this time I will be back.

**A.N – It's been a long, long time but I had writers block. I started this chapter shortly after I wrote the last one but nothing came to me. I hate that…**


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